9:00 –9:10 / Introduction / · Introduce Presenter
· Housekeeping – breaks/lunch, washroom locations and questions
· Creating a safe environment for all participants – no judgements or advice, simply accepting and respecting everyone’s space and perspective
· Introduction by each attendees - what they hope to gain by attending the workshop / Advise that there is a great deal of information in this workshop that cannot be completed in class – and that if they are truly committed to getting ready they will need to do some homework and for best results get some coaching.
9:10 – 9:15 / Mood Elevator Check-in / · At beginning of day, after lunch and at end of day – participants check where they are on the Mood Elevator.
· Explanation – to become aware of our physical, mental, and emotional energy levels and how they impact our moods and frame of mind / Have participants come to front of room and check each area of the mood elevator. Use different coloured markers for each time they do it. This will provide you with a snapshot of their energy levels throughout the day.
9:15 – 9:25 / Meaning of Readiness / · It is a state of being ready, willing and able to have the relationship of your dreams:
· Ask what ‘baggage’ am I carrying that will hold me back from finding the love I deserve: financial situation, health and fitness, emotional or mental state
· Know what you want by assessing what you don’t want (previous relationships) and by understanding your deal breakers.
· Mine your values and life vision – what are they? How clear is your vision? How do your values reflect the way you want to live your life?
· Understanding your life vision and values is critical to assessing compatibility with a partner.
· Know that the love mate of your dreams will honour, cherish, and share these values and vision / Recent US studies indicate that 69 % of all marriages fail because the couple had a different life vision – this is a crucial insight into what makes a successful partnership – couples had differing life visions.
9:25 – 9:35 / Chemistry of Falling in Love / Who Has Fallen in Love?
· How did it feel?
· Review 3 Stages of love – Lust, Attraction and Bonding.
· Who can relate? / · Use board or flip chart to list feelings
· Refer to chart in workbook (You may wish to use an overhead projector and slide of chart), draw it on the flip chart or have a large color copy available to tack to the wall
· Ask for comments from participants
9:35 – 9:45 / Relationship Failure / What happens next?
· Many relationships fail
· Who has been in a failed relationship? Why did it fail?
· What’s going on? How do we move from love to failure? What went wrong?
· What is missing?
o There is no reason or logic overlaid onto the “chemistry” of falling in love. We experience hormone overload, and logic seems to take a vacation!
· What are the most crucial skills a pilot must have? - takeoff and landing
· It doesn’t matter that a pilot can take off if he can’t land!
· Just like taking off and landing are two critical elements of flying a plane, the two elements that help us manage love are:
o Chemistry (emotional/physical/sexual)- the takeoff
o Logic and reason - helps us land the plane SAFELY!
o BOTH are important
· Much like a pilot it doesn’t help that you know how to take off…if you can’t land the plane.
· You NEED to create a way to allow you to BALANCE the head and the heart….and that is where conscious dating comes in. / · Ask participants for their opinion of why relationships fail
· Ask for show of hands – who has been in a failed relationship?
· Why did it fail? (List reasons on flip chart or board.)
9:45-9:55 / Introduction to Conscious Dating
3 Types of Relationships / · Before we discuss the philosophy of conscious dating…I want to ask what it is you WANT as a single, and what is holding you back?
· Fear! – many singles feel hopeless – they have given up or settle for less than what they want and deserve.
· Singles WANT the right relationship; they want to be happy in a great relationship – no one wants to make a mistake that will cost them emotionally, mentally, physically and financially.
· Being in a good ‘head’ space will help keep you in balance when you are heady with the chemical attraction to a potential mate. This means:
o Having clarity about your life vision and goals;
o Thinking BIG and unlimited, instead of small and scarce;
o Accepting that you are deserving of an amazing relationship with a partner who is worthy of you;
o Prioritizing ‘self’ by understanding and accepting that YOU are the centre of your universe and without you, nothing exists. This is different from being selfish!
o Starting to operate on a conscious level, by being aware and making good choices based on what you want. Realize that limiting beliefs reside in the subconscious and that it takes conscious control to affect positive change in your life.
o Understanding your values, relationship requirements and needs and ensuring that relationship choices need to be made based on that list. It also means making difficult choices based on the long term vision of your life.
· Review 3 Types of relationships: refer to manual
· Being a Successful Single / · Ask for responses
9:55 – 10:10 / Overview of Conscious Dating Program and of 10 Principles of Conscious Dating / Explain "Conscious Dating" from workbook
Philosophy – get your house in order – be ready – clean up baggage, understand what you want out of life, what your goals, values, relationship needs are. Only then will you be ready to attract the love of your life.
· Readiness is the foundation for attracting your ideal mate.
· Conscious Dating Process is 2 distinct stages:
o Readiness – Stage 1 – what today is all about
o Attraction – Stage 2 – now I know what I want, how do I get it?
· Finding a life partner requires WORK – like searching for your ideal job – you don’t sit at home waiting for it to come knocking on your door.
· In order to realize change, you need to understand this equation:
Awareness + Choices + Action = POSITIVE AND INTENTIONAL CHANGE
Review 10 Key Principles of Conscious Dating / Go to Flip Chart or write the equation on white board
10:10 – 10:20 / Frog Tale / · When I was a little (girl or boy) I (or my sister) had this beautiful book with a princess on the cover.
· The first page showed a princess on her horse riding into the forest.
· Page 2 was a picture of her dismounted near the edge of a pond. You could see a frog sitting on a rock near the water’s edge.
· The next picture showed the frog in the princess’ hand very close to her mouth….you could tell she was going to kiss that frog…and when I turned the page the frog had turned into a handsome prince.
(Take frog from hiding place)
That must have been a defective frog.
(Take 2nd frog from hiding place)
What a rip-off…I bought a bunch of defective frogs!
(when laughter dies down ask:)
What is the point here?
· The pond that we call earth is populated by frogs – over 6 billion of them. When we look at the pond, we see legions of frogs – the numbers seem endless. When most of those frogs look at us…well, you guessed it, they just see another frog.
· But amazingly, each and every frog is under a magical spell and is really a prince or princess in disguise. And when each frog looks in the mirror, they don’t see a frog face staring back at them - they see a beautiful prince or princess.
· On occasion, far out in the sea of green frog bodies, we might catch a glimpse of a prince or princess – and sometimes we may be startled to discover they also recognize us for who we really are too.
· When two frogs see the prince/ss in each other, it means they are compatible. It is nature’s way of telling them not to waste time with frogs who will never turn into a compatible prince/ss.
· Sometimes you may have to kiss a frog to see if s/he turns into a prince/ss. Most often they don’t, but occasionally one will change right before your eyes. You just never know until you plant the kiss!
Accept:
· You may need to kiss a lot of frogs before you find a prince/ss;
· If a frog doesn’t morph into a prince/ss, it’s because it isn’t the frog for you, so move on;
· If a frog doesn’t see the prince/ss in you, its because that frog isn’t for you, so move on and don’t waste your time feeling rejected (it’s a frog for goodness sake!);
It’s a BIG pond and the more you expose yourself to the frog population, the greater your chance of spotting your prince/ss; (hint: they are taller than frogs and not green). / Have 2 plastic frogs nearby that are hidden from view
Take 1 frog and kiss it. Wait a moment, shrug and toss it into the audience with a sigh before saying “That must have been a defective frog.”
Take next frog and kiss it. Wait a moment, shrug, say the line and toss it into the audience again
HANDOUT READINESS WORKBOOKS
10:20 – 10:50 / Relationship Readiness Quiz & Break / · Take Quiz (15 Minutes)
· Have 10 minute break during this exercise
Debrief & Key Learnings (5 Min) / Have attendees check their energy levels on the Mood Elevator as they return from break
10:50- 10:55 / My Rights / · Introduce "My Rights"
· How did that feel?
o Do the rights make sense to you?
o Do you believe in your rights?
· Are you Happy?
o Do you have a sense of peace?
o Do you have a sense of purpose?
o Do you feel anticipation when you awake?
o Are you “present” with your loved ones?
o Do you feel joy from what surrounds you?
o Do you feel connected?
· If not: why not? Being happy is your right and your choice / Have each participant read one sentence as you go around the room – make sure they start with “I have the right to…”Continue until all the Rights have been read aloud even if you have to ask participants to read more than one right.
10:55 - 12:30 / Subconscious versus Conscious / · Overview from workbook
· Top 10 Limiting beliefs
· Inner Voice vs Inner Critic
· Differences between Subconscious and Conscious and why our subconscious is usually NOT in alignment with our conscious goals
· Use the metaphor of the draft horses and wagon as the subconscious and the baby as the conscious
· Explain the process for retraining the Subconscious
· Exercise #1 - Wheel of Life
§ Explain exercise
§ Allow 5 minutes to complete
§ Coach Volunteer for 5 minutes
§ Debrief group & ask for Key Learnings (5 Min)
· Exercise #2 - Uncovering My Beliefs (Parts 1-4)
§ For each of the 4 parts
o Explain exercise
o Allow 5 minutes to complete
o Coach Volunteer for 5 minutes
o Debrief group & ask for Key Learnings (5 Min) / Refer to Charts
Ex #1 Note: those areas where people spend a lot of time or effort usually have a high rating of success – if love relationships score low it is because they aren’t focusing on that area. Success requires work!
12:30 - 1:15 / LUNCH
1:15 - 1:30 / Complete Limiting Beliefs Exercise / · Exercise #3- Eliminating My Top 3 Limiting Beliefs
· Remember how subconscious works…state what you WANT, not what you DON’T WANT
§ Explain exercise
§ Allow 5 minutes to complete
§ Coach Volunteer for 5 minutes
§ Debrief group & ask for Key Learnings (5 Min) / Have attendees check their energy levels on the Mood Elevator as they return from lunch
1:30- 1:40 / Creating Your Vision Overview / · What is a Life Vision or Purpose: Being in alignment with what is most important to me in my life and my deepest values and beliefs.
· When you are in alignment with your life purpose and living the vision, it just feels RIGHT . You feel at ease with what you are doing. There is no discomfort or feeling of being unsettled.
· Why people are disassociated from their Vision:
o Don’t realize they have an inner vision (the dream);
o We have been trained to do what others want (parents, peers, friends, teachers) and gradually lost our dream;
o Unaware – operate mostly on a subconscious level – sleepwalk;
o Stress numbs us- makes us robotic – function at only the most rudimentary levels;
o Lack of self prioritization – we don’t put ourselves first – yet we are the centre of our universe;
o Afraid to dream big or have learned to dream small because we don’t deserve more – many people have low self esteem.
o Our next exercise is designed to help you tap into who you really are / Mention again that there is limited time in class to complete all exercises and that they will likely need some coaching help to complete some of the exercises.
You will provide some options at the end of the class for those who are serious about going deeper and getting clarity.