Overcoming threats to family life through Natural Family Planning
-Fr. Kenneth Teles, Director, DFSC
Human life normally begins and ends in a family, the basic cell of society, a domestic Church. The members of healthy families rooted in Christian values build good families for the future. The family is the miniature society in which growing children learn how to relate with others.
The family, founded and given life by love, is a community of persons; of husband and wife, of parents and children, of grandparents and grandchildren of relatives. Its primary task is to live with fidelity the reality of communion, a constant effort to develop an authentic community of persons.
Christian family
The basic social norm for the family is the divine ordinanceon creation, statedat the beginning: “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and they will become one flesh” (Gen.2:24). The commitment of a man and a woman to the unique relationship of marriage establishes a social unit that supersedes the existing parental structure and authorizes the couple to become themselves parents in fulfilment of the procreation blessing (Gen.1:28).
Marriage is a great mystery
Marital communion is a sacred covenant in which the husband and the wife “give themselves to each other and accept each other” (G.S. 48). As the sacrament of their covenant, marriage is a “great mystery”. It expresses the spousal love of Christ for his Church: “Husband, love your wives as Christ loved the Church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word” (Eph. 5:25-26). A matrimonial relationship, purified in divine love and established in faith, is enriched by the experience of God’s presence and power.
Family: called to live the Trinitarian spirituality.
Every family has its origin in God and this God is a triune God. He created man and woman in his own image, according to his likeness (cf. Gen. 1:26). Divine life is the centre and foundation of every family. The Christian family by its very vocation is called to partake of the life of the Most Holy Trinity, that is the spirituality of love and communion, which is the daily sustenance of all Christian families and every liturgical celebration.
Family: called to a be a communion of persons
Communion of persons is established through fidelity and total self-giving of spouses to one to the other. They should be aware of their own ability and limitations; so also, the ability and limitations of the other. They should constantly renew and relive the commitment given to God and to each other on the wedding day. As human beings, they are prone to commit mistakes but they should acquire strength from the Lord to change, convert and to forgive. These conditions will bring about the success and the durability of the family communion.
Family the sanctuary of life
In his encyclical Centesimus annus, Pope St. John Paul II refers to the family as ‘the Sanctuary of Life.” A sanctuary is a sacred place, dedicated to God, where God meets man and vice-versa. Pope St. John Paul II says so because the family is the place in which, life - the gift of God - can be properly welcomed and protected against the many attacks to which it is exposed, and it can develop in accordance with what constitute authentic human growth. As a domestic Church, the family is called and sent out to proclaim, celebrate and serve the Gospel of Life and Love.
Family: Increase and multiply
Fecundity is a gift, an end of marriage, for conjugal love naturally tends to be fruitful. A child does not come from outside as something added on to the mutual love of the spouses, but springs from the very heart of that mutual giving, as its fruit and fulfilment. So, the Church, which “is on the side of life” (FC 30) teaches that “each and every marriage act must remain open to the transmission of life” (HV 11). “This particular doctrine, expounded on numerous occasions by the Magisterium, is based on the inseparable connection, established by God, which man on his own initiative may not break, between the unitive significance and the procreative significance which are both inherent to the marriage act” (HV 12; cf. Pius XI. Enc. Casti Connubii).
Called to give life, spouses share in the creative power and fatherhood of God. (cf. Eph. 3:14). “Married couples should regard it as their proper mission to transmit human life, and to educate their children; they should realize that they are thereby cooperating with the love of God the Creator and are, in a certain sense, its interpreters. They will fulfill this duty with a sense of human and Christian responsibility” (GS 50§ 2).
“By safeguarding both these essential aspects, the unitive and the procreative, the conjugal act preserves in its fullness the sense of true mutual love and its orientation toward man’s exalted vocation to parenthood” (CCC 2369).
Threats to the Family
The family today has to face many situations like severely deformed babies, handicapped persons, mentally retarded persons, elderly persons, abuse of the elderly, persons with incurable diseases, AIDS, etc.... Every person is irreplaceably precious in the sight of God. Our human dignity and all human rights that accompany this dignity, come from God. The only proper response to a person is love.
Lack of understanding of the above or the unwillingness to make an effort to live family life as per the plan of God can lead the family to encounter practises that could threaten the very essence of family life.
Individualism: Anti-life revolutionaries promote practices that break the bond/link between family members so that everyone thinks only by himself and of himself. This is slowly creeping in our society.
Threat to the Unitive element of the sacrament of matrimony: Unitive means the husband-wife are called to love, share and grow together.
Divorce, adultery, pornography, trial marriages, live-in marriages, and swapping partners break the unitive link between husband and wife by destroying trust, faithfulness, openness and communication.
Threat to the Procreative element of the sacrament of matrimony: The procreative dimension of marriage demands that the couple remain open to life from natural conception to the natural death following the plan of God revealed in the book of Genesis (Gen. 1, 28). All unnatural or artificial means of birth control whether temporary or permanent (sterilization) are immoral and blameworthy.
Contraceptionis that action which, either in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible is a wrong action (cf. HV, 14). This includes the pill, the intrauterine device, foams, diaphragms, condoms etc. The other forms of unnatural or artificial means are procured abortion, withdrawal, mutual or solitary masturbation and sodomistic practices. “From the moment of its conception, life must be guarded with greatest care, while abortion and infanticide are unspeakable crimes” (GS. 51). These means of unnatural birth control have been a significant factor which has contributed to the breakdown of family stability thereby giving rise to divorce. The other abuses that take place within the family are murder, rape, domestic violence, substance abuse and suicide to name a few.
Natural Family Planning: a way of life
Natural family planning (NFP) is fertility awareness, which is simply knowledge of a couple’s fertility. It is a means of reading the body’s signs of fertility and infertility; applying this knowledge through the Sympto-Thermal Method (STM) is over 99% effective in postponing pregnancy. A married couple’s virtuous application of this knowledge either to try to achieve a pregnancy or to postpone a pregnancy is called responsible parenthood.
Practicing NFP is 100% natural — there are no drugs, chemicals or devices involved, which is one reason many today find it to be a positive and refreshing alternative to contraceptive methods. NFP honours our dignity as persons by respecting the natural rhythms and functions of the body. It is very common to hear couples who use NFP speak of an increased awe and respect for femininity and their mutual fertility, and a greater sense of empowerment through self-knowledge.
Those spousal couples who avoid unnatural means of birth control bear witness to improved marital relationship, improved communication, absence of feelings of being used, development of non-genital courtship, peace of conscience, and no fear of the dangerous effects of some unnatural methods that have been mentioned above all contributing to an improved relationship. In addition, the practice of Natural Family Planning (NFP) helps to develop the same character strengths that are necessary for marital fidelity and life-long marriage.
The lack of willingness to learn and practice NFP and the silence from the pulpit, in many instances, towards the promotion of NFP, hamper its beneficial effects from reaching spouses. Once understood in the light of Theology of the Body of St. John Paul II, it is a great enlightenment for the spousal couple, who otherwise go through the grind of the tough anti-family lifestyle in today’s world. The Diocesan Family Service Centre teaches engaged and spousal couples to follow this Divine plan by promoting NFP.
History
Natural family planning is a method wherein the spousal couple is made aware of the woman’s fertile and infertiletime thereby making themresponsible in their life to achieve or postpone pregnancy.
The Diocesan Family Service Centre was established inSeptember 1976 in response to mass sterilization inIndia duringthe Emergency. The Centre was the collective effort ofa group of lay people with Dr. Auria Mascarenhas, as the Director and Sergio Carvalho as the AssistantDirector. Rev. Fr. Saturnino Dias then took over asits next Director from July 1977 till March 1983.
Thework done in the field of NFP by the DFSC, Goa extended beyond the borders of Goa.With the help of Fr. Saturnino Dias, who was also NFP Project Director and Dr. Aurea Mascarenhas as the AssistantDirector and also the chief co-ordinator, one of the pioneers of the NFP movement in Goa, the benefits of NFP grew exponentially. Since then, they have been with the Centre, guiding it all the way.It was during their tenure that NFP sessions were started during the Marriage Formation Programme (MFP).
Seminars on the Billings Ovulation method were held to train teachersto serve at the Centre and at the parish level. NFP teacherswere active at the parish level, and provided with additional data for scientific study of NFP in Goa.
Programmes on NFP were also recorded by All India Radio and talks were delivered on the need of NFP and related topics by Fr. Saturnino and Dr. Auria.A leaflet on the Billing ovulation method both in English and Konkani were published and also a book in Devnagiri konkani to reach out to the other section of the society.The sessions on NFP, that is the Billings method continued with the subsequent Directors along with the Training of the Trainers in NFP. The Billings method was taught at the Konkanni/ EnglishMFP courses up to October 2009. The conducted session was of 45 minutesduration.
From November 2009,the DFSC went a step higher. It started teaching the sympto – thermal method for aduration of two and a halfhours, whereinthe instructors do personal charting and practice charts with the participants. During the sessions, the Couple to Couple League (CCL)’s “Mucus only method” isdealt with. The second session on the use of “temperature method”is conductedfor those registering for the same by Mr. and Mrs. Valentine and Anna Coelho, who are pioneers in introducing and preparing instructors for the same in Goa and India at large.
The DFSC started celebrating and organizing 3rd Sunday of July as Natural Family Planning Propagation day in our Archdiocese through its Responsible parenthood department to celebrate ‘Humanae Vitae’ the Encyclical Letter on moral teaching of the Church on marriage and family by His Holiness Pope Paul VI of Blessed Memories from the year 2011. Every year the diocesan event is celebrated in a particular parish for the whole deanery with the liturgy being published on ‘Amcho Sevadhorm’. A letter with inserts for Bulletins is sent to parishes, schools, colleges to celebrate the day and the week with the matter being uploaded on our website as well..
Keeping with the Pastoral theme of this year, we at the DFSC are celebrating Natural Family Planning PropagationDay on the 16th of July 2017 for the 7th consecutive year in succession and the week following it(16th to the 23rd July).
The worldwide theme for 2017 is:
It's time! Say "Yes" to God's plan for Marriage! Natural Family Planning
The slogan focuses on God's gift of the nature of marriage to husband and wife. Natural Family Planning is presented as a support for married couples to honor God's plan.
On this day, we focus on the three predictions made by Pope Paul VI if contraceptives mentality prevails. They are
a)Loss of marital fidelity – that fidelity is lost for we see trail marriages, live-in-relationship, pre-marital or extra-marital affairs, and changing partners has become the norm of the day.
b)General lowering of moral standards and
c)Lack of reverence due to a woman by which she is treated as a mere instrument for the satisfaction of his own desires, stressed by focusing the attention on the rapes that we witness on our daily newspaper.
I call this Pope a Prophet for all his predictionshave come true and we are able to witness the result.
The Responsible Parenthood department of the Diocesan Family Service Centre is working very hard to bring awareness and to help spousal couples to know the importance of NFP. This awareness is created not only among the members of the Catholic community but also among the members of other faiths as well.
The Diocesan Family Service Centre organized seminars on Natural Family Planning, at Arambol, Curca, Chimbel, Bambolim and Talaulim (Santana)for anganwadi workers and members who received their training in NFP. We also helped doctors, nurses and other health workers.
The speakers convinced the participants about the scientifically proven effectiveness of the method. They further said that NFP is a healthy, safe and morally accepted method. They helped them with charting exercise. Among those who attended the workshop there was one who was pregnant who was helped to cope up with pregnancy and five women who were in their pre-menopause who were helped to know the symptoms and to respond to these symptoms. There was counseling offered to a woman having difficulty in child bearing. All who attended the workshop were very receptive and enjoyed each of the session and are looking forward for the follow up session to be held next month. Centre served them tea and snacks.
In response to the challenges to the Pastoral care for the families as envisaged in the Preparatory Document for the III Extra-Ordinary Synod of Bishops held in October 2014 we offered Deanery conferences for religious and clergy of our Archdioceses to present the beauty of NFP to families at the parish level. We had these conferences in the following deaneries: Aldona, Benaulim, Daman, Mapusa, Margao, Murmugao, Panjim, Pernem, Ponda, Quepem, Raia, Sanguem and Siolim. On this occasion DFSC published book compiled from various articles and sermons as a ready material for priests and religious to make use in their ministry titled, “God’s Plan for Love Life and Family”, a few copies of which are still available with the Centre.
Conclusion
God is love and the Author of life and human sexuality. Authentic religion is concerned with sex because sex is concerned with love and life. God is truth, and it is Catholic belief that the Church is guided by the Holy Spirit in teaching the truth about love –including sexual love. “If you make my Word your home you will indeed be my disciples you will learn the truth, and the truth will make you free.” (Jn. 8: 31-32). So, it is pertinent that spousal couples learn and practice NFP, to speak the truth with each other in the marital embrace to overcome the threats to the family.
To put you in touch with a NFP teacher, please contact your Parish Priest
or call DFSC on 2224140
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