Page 2 THE VILLAGE WORDSMITH April 2002
THE VILLAGE WORDSMITH
A compendium of second-guessing for the San Antonio Express-Newscopy desk and other interested parties
April 2004 Vol VIII, No. 4
Page 2 THE VILLAGE WORDSMITH April 2002
Here’s what we do best
The front page on Sunday, March 14, served up a piece that is the sort of thing the Express-News does regularly for its readers – a story they would not find elsewhere, heavy on human interest, carefully crafted and splendidly illustrated, by Staff Writer Michelle Koidin Jaffee and Staff Photojournalist Nicole Frugé.
The story, S.A. is promised land, told how a San Antonio couple had overcome a seemingly endless parade of obstacles and disappointments to bring a 7-year-old orphan here from riot-torn Haiti, to become their adopted daughter.
The efforts of the parents and the resultant happiness of their entire family – and the awe and wonder with which the child, Carinette, took in her new surroundings – made a warm Sunday feature to offer to our readers.
Good work, Michelle and Nicole.
Flough through?
Roseanne “Rosie” Brooks, who will be 19 on Valentine's Day, was driving the Toyota Corolla that flew threw the air and landed on a Ford F-150. (Feb. 7, caught by the slot)
Most writers, from kindergarten to old age, have learned to depend on spell-check programs. But whoever invented such programs probably never envis-
ioned the way homonyms like this one would frustrate editors.
I had a cow named Daisy . . .
This newspaper’s coverage of the San Antonio Stock Show & Rodeo in February included a picture of two cows identified as Brown Swiss Daisy heifers.
A day or so later our one-time Agriculture Writer Joe Fohn – identified before in this publication as knowing more about cows than Dr. Wordsmith ever thought about learning – e-mailed an explanation to us for this strange nomenclature. Brown Swiss, he reported to us, is a breed of dairy (not daisy) cow.
Hoo noo?
Protecting the Constitution
The United States played a similar role in drafting the ICC rules, which offer similar protections to the U.S. Constitution . . . (Feb. 28, Page 11B)
Say what?
A quick read of this sentence was likely to confuse many readers, as it did me.
At first glance, it seemed the ICC rules were offering protections to the U.S. Constitution, which made no sense at all
Rereading the sentence made it plainer that the protections being offered by the International Criminal Court rules were not to the Constitution but to anyone under the international court’sjurisdiction, and the writer meant to say those protections are similar to those offered by that older document.
Switching a few words around would have made it a lot clearer: . . . the court rules, which offer protections similar to those in the U.S. Constitution . . .
Our readers aren’t dense, but it never hurts to point the way for them from time to time.
The two-verb rule
County Court-at-Law 6 Judge Phil Meyer sentenced Dominguez to two years’ probation, 100 hours of community service and ordered her to pay a $500 fine. (March 11, changed on the rim)
Here’s a splendid example of the placement of a conjunction closing out a list.
The $500 fine isn’t part of the list that includes the probation and the community service. Those two items follow the verb sentenced, and thus should have been separated by and instead of a comma. The $500 fine boasts its very own verb, ordered, and thus was no kin to the other two items. One verb, one conjunction. Two verbs, two conjunctions
So the sentence appeared in the paper this way:
. . . Meyer sentenced Dominguez to two years’ probation and 100 hours of community service and ordered her to pay a $500 fine.
A quick fix like that makes clear to the reader the difference between what the judge sentenced and what he ordered.
Cutting timber
“Dean is just a loose cannon,” Michaud said, while Lieberman is likeable, “but I just don’t think he’s presidential timbre.” (Jan. 25, Page 19A)
Ye olde Webster's New World College Dictionary says timbre is reserved for harmonics, defining that spelling as “the characteristic quality of sound that distinguishes one voice or musical instrument from another.”
On the same page, timber, definition 6, is “personal quality or character [a man of his timber].”
Presumably, the speaker wasn’t referring to “the characteristic quality of sound” of Sen. Joe Lieberman’s voice among his lack of presidential attributes.
This is one of those words that most copy editors (including Dr. Wordsmith) ought to look up the first time it comes to their attention.
Just between us . . .
Egypt will host talks between Yasser Arafat’s government, Islamic militant groups and other Palestinian factions on how to control the Gaza Strip. . . (March 13, Page 22A)
Those Egyptian talks have too many participants for them to be between anybody. If substituting among for between in this sentence makes it sound awkward, try with. As in Egypt will host talks with Yasser Arafat’s government and all those other folks.
If Egypt plans to talk to Arafat and then go into the next room and talk to the Islamic militants while Arafat talks separately with the other Palestinians, then those would be two-group talks and one could say between. But if more than two people or things or groups are involved, most experts don’t like between.
One language expert on the other side is James J. Kilpatrick. In The Writer’s Art, he muses: “Contrary to the rule expounded in some antiseptic quarters, there is no rigid rule that between is used only for two things and among only for three or more.”
Chopping down an evergreen
Where front-runner Howard Dean’s wife has rarely talked to the media, Teresa Heinz Kerry has spoken candidly about using Botox and having a prenuptial agreement. (March 14, Page 3K)
Note the date on this piece. Howard Dean was eclipsed by John Kerry as the front-runner for the Democratic presidential nomination some time ago, almost as soon as the primary season began, and took himself out of the race in Kerry’s favor a few weeks before this article was published. .
Obviously, this was one of those not-very-time-sensitive articles that had been prepared for publication some weeks before and was sitting around waiting for a page with a big enough hole to run it.
Some newspapers call those “anytimes.” Some others, and most television news departments, call them “evergreens.” The only trouble with them is, if they sit around too long somebody better read them again to make sure, as in this case, that something in them hasn’t grown out of date.
Bracketing the news
Stulting . . . made the entire trip from Bracketville to San Antonio. (March 24, Page 6G)
Brackettville, the county seat of KinneyCounty and about 120 miles west of San Antonio, is the town John Wayne made famous when he chose it to build and film his Hollywood version of the Alamo.
With that in mind, you’d think anybody writing about the John Wayne movie should know how to spell Brackettville. Two t’s, please.