Tickling the Monster: Jealousy Induction in Relationships

Tickling the Monster: Jealousy-induction in Relationships

- 2 types of jealousy-induction goals:

o  relational rewards

- improve relationship

- help boost self-esteem

- increase relational rewards

o  relational revenge

- punish partner

- need for revenge

- desire to control partner

- 3 types of jealousy-induction tactics:

o  relational distancing

o  flirtation façade

o  relational alternatives

- 3 types of partner-response to jealousy:

o  aggressive

o  withdrawal

o  relational compensation

*both relational compensation and withdrawal lead to relational improvement*

- People sometimes intentionally attempt to make their partners jealous

- What is jealousy?

o  a complex of thoughts, emotions and actions that follows loss or threat to self-esteem and/or the existence or quality of the romantic relationship

- What is romantic jealousy?

o  a set of thoughts emotions and responses following perceived threat to a romantic relationship by a rival

-Jealousy always results from predispositions and a triggering event

-Jealousy complex:

o  comprised of anger, fear and sadness

o  associated with loss of affection, rejection, suspicion, insecurity and anxiety

- Jealousy is more prevalent in couples in love due to their emotional dependence

- Jealousy is motivated by certain strategic goals; goals followed by tactics to elicit certain jealous responses

goals:

·  to hurt their partner or cause emotional distress

·  to gain partner’s attention

·  to increase partners’ commitment

·  mate-retention strategy

·  to test the relationship

·  to boost self esteem and confidence

tactics:

·  talking of past/current relationships

·  flirting

·  dating or sexual contact with another

·  lying about the existence of a rival

·  sexually/emotionally spending less time

responses:

·  negative affect expression (crying)

·  solution-oriented communication

·  aggressive/negative communication

·  active distancing

·  avoidance or denial

·  violent threats or behavior

·  surveillance

·  manipulative attempts

- the more influential partner responses tend to be improvement and withdrawal

- the tactic and goal help moderate the response

- jealousy is influenced by biological sex, relational involvement, and commitment

- more females used withdrawal responses than males in other studies

(though equal responses were found in this study, and inconsistent elsewhere,

this cannot be proven)

- measures of study were newly developed and require further study in order to validate

information

- individual perceptions were taken opposed to hearing both sides of the story

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

1) Do you consider jealousy to be an adequate form of communication considering partners develop jealousy-inducting tactics to gain attention from each other?

2) In which ways can one increase their partner’s commitment using jealousy? And what may be some healthier alternatives?