Ghost Chickens in the Sky
Scout Songs
Ghost Chickens in the Sky
A chicken farmer went walking out one dark and fateful day
He rested by the coop as he went on along his way
When all at once a rotten egg hit him in the eye
It was the sight he dreaded
Ghost chickens in the sky!
Bok bok bok BOK
Bok bok BOK
Ghost chickens in the sky
The farmer had raised chickens since he was 24
A-working for the Colonel for thirty years or more
Killing all those chickens and sending them to fry
Now they want revenge...
Ghost chickens in the sky.
Bok bok bok BOK
Bok bok BOK
Ghost chickens in the sky
Their feet were black and shiny, their eyes were burning red
They had no meat or feathers, these chickens all were dead
They carried off the farmer and he died by the claw
They cooked him extra crispy
And ate him with cole slaw
Bok bok bok BOK
Bok bok BOK
Ghost chickens in the sky
Shaving Cream - Benny Bell
I have a sad story to tell you
It may hurt your feelings a bit
Last night as I walked into my bathroom
I stepped in a big pile of ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
I think I'll break off with my girlfriend
Her antics are queer, I'll admit
Each time I say, "Darling, I love you"
She tells me that I'm full of ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
Our baby fell out of the window
You'd think that her head would be split
But good luck was with her that morning
She fell in a barrel of ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
My old lady died in a bathtub
She died from a terrible fit
In order to fulfill her wishes
She was buried in six feet of ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
When I was in France with the army
One day I looked inside my kit
I thought i would find me a sandwich
But the darn thing was loaded with ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
And now folks my story is ended
I think it is time I should quit
And if anyone of you feel offended
Push your head in a bucket of ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen
Its A Lie
I was born a hundred thousand years ago. (YEARS AGO)
And there's nothing in this world I do not know. (DO NOT KNOW)
I saw Peter, Paul, and Moses playing ring-around the roses,
And I'll lick the guy who says it isn't so. (IT ISN'T SO)
Chorus:
It's a lie; It's a lie ; Ship ahoy, ship ahey, ship a hi-hi-hi!
Oh, I've sailed the seven seas and I've sniffed the salty breeze,
But I never, ever, ever saw a mermaid. (A MERMAID)
I was there when Satan looked the garden o'er. (GARDEN O'ER)
I saw Adam and Eve a'driven from the door. (FROM THE DOOR)
I was round the corner peekin' at the apple they was eatin'
I can prove I was the guy that ate the core. (ATE THE CORE)
Chorus:
It's a lie; It's a lie ; Ship ahoy, ship ahey, ship a hi-hi-hi!
Oh, I've sailed the seven seas and I've sniffed the salty breeze,
But I never, ever, ever saw a mermaid. (A MERMAID)
I was there when Ceasar crossed the Rubicon. (RUBICON)
I'm the guy who built the raft he crossed it on. (CROSSED IT ON)
I saw Nero burning Rome, and Hannibal at home.
I even saw the fall of Babylon. (BABBLE ON)
Chorus:
It's a lie; It's a lie ; Ship ahoy, ship ahey, ship a hi-hi-hi!
Oh, I've sailed the seven seas and I've sniffed the salty breeze,
But I never, ever, ever saw a mermaid. (A MERMAID)
I saw Washington afloat a cake of ice. (CAKE OF ICE)
I saw Sherman, Lee, and Grant a shakin' dice. (SHAKIN' DICE)
I saw Roosevelt's great laugh that split his face in half,
While Pershing set a trap for German mice. (GERMAN MICE)
Chorus:
It's a lie; It's a lie ; Ship ahoy, ship ahey, ship a hi-hi-hi!
Oh, I've sailed the seven seas and I've sniffed the salty breeze,
But I never, ever, ever saw a mermaid. (A MERMAID)
You may think that all this bunk, it isn't true. (IT ISN'T TRUE)
But what difference does it really make to you? (MAKE TO YOU)
I've been feeding you this line just to pass away the time,
And now I'm going to quit because I'm through. (YOU'RE THROUGH)
Chorus:
It's a lie; It's a lie ; Ship ahoy, ship ahey, ship a hi-hi-hi!
Oh, I've sailed the seven seas and I've sniffed the salty breeze,
But I never, ever, ever saw a mermaid. (A MERMAID)
If I Were Not A Boy Scout
If I were not a Boy Scout, something else I'd rather be..
If I were not a Boy Scout, a ______I would be.
(This song usually needs at least five Scouts to be fun.
Each Scout has his own verse to sing.
Start with the group refrain and then add a Scout each time you sing it.
(Refrain + first Scout, Refrain + first Scout + second Scout ....
It gets longer and funnier each time. )
Here are some verses that go with it.
Plumber - Plunge it, flush it, overflow, Plunge it, flush it, look out below!
Lawyer - Guilty - Innocent - (Pause ---) I don't really care!
Preacher - Hallelujah, Amen (Pause --) Pass the plate again
Pizza maker - Toss it, turn it, throw it in the air (make motions, turn around) Toss it, turn it, - got it in my hair
Hark - a - Lark - flying through the park, Splat!
Bus driver - turn it, swerve it, push it to the floor
Truck Driver - grind them gears -- been doing it for years!
Farmer - here's a cow, there's a cow, YUK!
Farmer (milking cow) - Give, Bessie, Give - Baby's gotta live
Garbage Collector I Would Be - Pile that garbage, pile that garbage, pile it to the sky!
A Statute I Would Be - (Strike a pose as a statue without moving the rest of the song)
A Life Guard I Would Be - Look so fine, Look so fine, no tan line
A Camp Director I Would Be - Do this, do that, Hmmm, I think I'll take a nap
A Lumberjack I Would Be - Chop the tree, chop the tree, I hate Ecology
Carpenter (nailing) - Two by Four - nail it to the floor, bang bang bang
Girl Scout - Hey there Doctor, Hey there Rookie, come on down and buy a cookie
Here's an example of the song using about 15 people (some of the verses
are the same as above and some are new ones)
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(1st Scout) A Hippi I would be.
(Say Slowly) Peace! Love! Never cut your hair!
Peace! Love! Never cut your hair!
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Fireman I would be.
(Sat Fast) Jumpedee Jumpedee Umm Splash
Jumpedee Jumpedee Umm Splash
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Preacher I would be.
(Say medium speed) Well, well you never can tell, you might go to
Heaven or you might go to...
Well, well you never can tell, you might go to Heaven or you might
go to...Well, well you never can tell
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Rambo Smurf I would be.
(Smurf Tune) La, La, La, La La La, La, La, La, La La La. BANG!!
La, La, La, La La La, La, La, La, La La La. BANG!!
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Tree I would be.
(Hold up tree branches for a few seconds)
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Farmer I would be.
(Same tempo as the Fireman) Give, Betsie, Give. My babies got to live
Give, Betsie, Give. My babies got to live
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Hairdresser I would be.
(Act real hyper) Twist it! Tease it! Tie it in a bow! Woo!!
Twist it! Tease it! Tie it in a bow! Woo!!
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Cop I would be.
(Medium speed) Chocolate cover, cream filled
Chocolate cover, cream filled
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A College Student I would be.
(Fast) Party, party all night long.
Party, party all night long.
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Plumber I would be.
(Medium speed) Plung it! Flush it! Look out below!
Plung it! Flush it! Look out below!
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Carpenter I would be.
(Medium speed) Two by Four, and nail it to the floor.
Two by Four, and nail it to the floor.
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Ice Cream Man I would be.
(Medium speed) Scoop It! Slush It! That will be a dime!
Scoop It! Slush It! That will be a dime!
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be,
(group) If I were not a Boy Scout, I'll tell you what I would be...
(Next Scout) A Scoutmaster I would be.
(Yelling) SHUT-UP!! SHUT-UP!! Go to bed. OH my gosh my aching head!!
SHUT-UP!! SHUT-UP!! Go to bed. OH my gosh my aching head!!
My Turtle
My turtle swims sideways
Your turtle swims upside down
My turtle swims sideways
Your turtle is DEAD!
On Top of Spaghetti
On top of spaghetti,
All covered with cheese,
I lost my poor meatball,
When somebody sneezed.
It rolled off the table,
And on to the floor,
And then my poor meatball,
Rolled out of the door.
It rolled in the garden,
And under a bush,
And then my poor meatball,
Was nothing but mush.
The mush was as tasty
As tasty could be,
And then the next summer,
It grew into a tree.
The tree was all covered,
All covered with moss,
And on it grew meatballs,
And tomato sauce.
So if you eat spaghetti,
All covered with cheese,
Hold on to your meatball,
Whenever you sneeze.
Alice the Camel
Alice the camel has 4 humps, Alice the camel has 4 humps
Alice the camel has 4 humps so go Alice go
wibble wobble wibble
Alice the camel has 3 humps, Alice the camel has 3 humps
Alice the camel has 3 humps so go Alice go
wibble wobble wibble
Alice the camel has 2 humps, Alice the camel has 2 humps
Alice the camel has 2 humps so go Alice go
wibble wobble wibble
Alice the camel has 1 hump, Alice the camel has 1 hump
Alice the camel has 1 hump so go Alice go
wibble wobble wibble
Alice the camel hasNO humps, Alice the camel hasNO humps
Alice the camel hasNO humps
Because Alice was a donkey.
I Met A Bear
Chorus:
(Same lines in unison)
The other day, I met a bear,
A great big bear, Oh way out there.
He looked at me, I looked at him,
He sized up me, I sized up him.
He said to me, "Why don't you run?
I see you ain't, Got any gun."
I says to him, "That's a good idea."
"Now legs get going, get me out of here!"
And so I ran, Away from there,
But right behind me, Was that bear.
In front of me, There was a tree,
A great big tree, Oh glory be!
The lowest branch, Was ten feet up,
So I thought I'd jump, And trust my luck.
And so I jumped, Into the air,
But I missed that branch, A way up there.
Now don't you fret, And don't you frown,
I Caught that branch, On the way back down!
This is the end, There aint no more,
Unless I see, That bear once more.
Boom Chick A Boom
(Repeat each line after song leader)
I said a Boom Chicka Boom
I said a Boom Chicka Boom
I said a Boom Chicka Rocka Chicka Rocka Chicka Boom
Uh huh
Oh yeah
One more time ______style.
Janitor Style:
I said a Broom Sweep-a Broom
I said a Broom Sweep-a Broom
I said a Broom Sweep-a Mop-a Sweep-a Mop-a Sweep-a Broom
Valley Girl Style:
I said like boom chicka boom
I said a totally boom chicka boom
I said like boom chicka like rocka chicka like gag me with a spoon
Baseball Style:
I said a boom chicka boom
I said a boom chicka boom
I said a boom chicka rocka hit that softball to the moon.
Barn-yard Style:
I said a moo chicka moo
I said a moo chicka moo
I said a moo chicka watch your step, don't track it in the room.
Race Car Style:
I said a vroom shifta vroom
I said a vroom shifta vroom
I said a vroom shifta grind-a shifta grind-a shifta vroom
Astronaut Style:
I said a moon shoot the moon
I said a moon shoot the moon
I said a moon blast-me shoot-me blast-me shoot-me-to-the-moon
Flower Style:
I said a bloom chicka bloom
I said a bloom chicka bloom
I said a bloom chicka blossom smell those flowers chicka bloom
Parent Style:
I said a boom GO TO YOUR ROOM
I said a boom GO TO YOUR ROOM
I said a boom GO TO YOUR ROOM and don't come out 'til next June.
Cheerleader Style:
I said a Boom-Go-Fight-Boom
I said a Boom-Go-Fight-Boom
I said a Boom Go-Fight-Win Go-Fight-Win Go-Fight-Boom
Taco Bell Style:
I said a bean chicka bean
I said a bean chicka bean
I said a bean and cheese burrito and a nacho supreme.
Arnold Schwarznegger Style:
[speak it slowly with a heavy 'Ahnold' accent and shoot a gun on every BOOM]
Ich spracht Boom Chicka Boom
Ich spracht Boom Chicka Boom
Ich spracht Boom Chicka Rocka Chicka Rocka Chicka Boom
Ah hah
Oh ja
Noch ein mal ______style.
McDonalds Style:
I said a Big Mac and Fries
I said a Big Mac and Fries
I said a Big Mac and Fries and dont forget to Super Size.
Photographer Style:
I said a zoom clicka zoom.
I said a zoom clicka zoom.
I said a zoom clicka Smile Watch the Birdie clicka zoom.
End of the World Style:
I said a Doom Chicka Doom.
I said a Doom Chicka Doom.
I said a Doom Chicka *Huge Explosion Noise* Chicka *Huge Explosion Noise* Chicka Doom.
Homie Style:
I said a grill shiny grill
I said a bling chinga bling
I said a Honda Civic rims a-spinnin' on my Limousine
Fonzie Style:
I said a vroom chicka vroom
I said a vroom chicka vroom
I said a vroom chicka aaaaaaye chicka aaaaaaye chicka vroom
Thunderstorm Style:
I said a boom crasha boom
I said a boom crasha boom
I said a boom crasha flasha crasha flasha crasha boom
Space Style:
I said a space chicka space
I said a space chicka space
I said there's a Pluto there's a Mars there's the Earth and there's the stars
Surfer Style:
I said a dude chicka dude
I said a dude chicka dude
I said a dude chicka wipe out chicka WHOA chicka dude
Conservation Style:
I said a tree hug a tree
I said a tree hug a tree
I said save the whales, save the gas, save the water, hug a tree
Librarian Style:
I said a book read a book
I said a book read a book
I said a book choose a novel, keep it quiet, read a book
Bee Style:
I said a Bzzzz chicka Bzzzz
I said a Bzzzz chicka Bzzzz
I said a Bzzzz flower nectar pollen honey chicka Bzzzz
Fire Style:
I said a OUCH chicka OUCH
I said a OUCH chicka OUCH
I said a OUCH burnt my finger in the fire Chicka OUCH
Speeder Style:
I said a Vroom Squeela Vroom
I said a Vroom Squeela Vroom
I said a Vroom Theres a Coppa Betta Stoppa Chicka Vroom
Cellphone Style:
I said a call me on my cell
I said a call me on my cell
I said a call me, text me, call me, text me, call me on my cell
Little Green Frog
Eee Ah went the little green frog one day
Eee Ah went the little green frog.
Eee Ah went the little green frog one day
And His eyes went Eee aAh too.
Honk, Honk, went the big blue bus one day
Squish, Squash, went the little green frog.
His eyes don't go Eee Ah any more
'Cause he got eaten up by a dog. Woof! Woof!
I'm My Own Grandpa
Many, many years ago when I was 23,
I was married to a widder who was purty as can be.