FADE IN:
EXT. SMITH’S HOUSE – DAY
It’s a beautiful day in the neighborhood. The sun is shining and it’s very warm.
RONALD SMITH, 32 years old, is watering foliage next to his beautiful backyard pool. He is wearing a tight white Speedo suit, green Oakley sunglasses, and a smile.
KATHERINE SMITH, 30 years old, walks out from inside the house with ABIGAIL, 25 years old and very, very, very HOT. Both are dressed in teeny weenie bikinis.
Ronald looks up and turns off his hose.
RONALD
Hi Katherine, how are you?
Katherine and Abigail walk up to where Ronald is standing.
KATHERINE
Hi Ronald. I am fine. How are you.
RONALD
I am great. It sure is a beautiful
day, isn’t it?
KATHERINE
It sure is. What are you doing?
Ronald looks down at the hose in his hand.
RONALD
I’m watering the foliage, Katherine.
Katherine laughs.
KATHERINE
Oh, I see, that’s why you have a
hose in your hand Ronald.
Ronald looks to Abigail, as a bulge begins to grow in his Speedo suit.
RONALD
And who is this beautiful friend
of yours?
KATHERINE
This is my new lesbian friend, Abigail.
Ronald looks puzzled.
RONALD
Your new lesbian friend?
Katherine smiles and rubs Abigail’s big breasts.
KATHERINE
Yes, my new lesbian friend.
RONALD
I didn’t know you had any lesbian
friends.
KATHERINE
I didn’t before…she’s my new
lesbian friend.
Ronald tries to smile as the bulge in his pants gets more and more obvious.
RONALD
Oh, I see. Hi Abigail, I’m Ronald.
Abigail smiles bashfully and looks down at Ronald’s boner, which is now quite obvious.
ABIGAIL
Hi Ronald, nice to meet you. Looks
like you’ve got quite a big piece
of meat crammed into that Speedo.
RONALD
Yes I do.
Katherine nods.
KATHERINE
Yes, he sure does…big meat.
RONALD
Do you two want to go skinny dipping
naked? We could just take off our
clothes.
Katherine looks at Abigail with a smile.
KATHERINE
Yes we could.
ABIGAIL
I would like that very much. My
big breasts would also like to be
free.
RONALD
Alright let us do that then.
KATHERINE
Alright let us get naked.
All three take their suits off and stare at each other. Then the girls both stare at Ronald’s erection. Then they all jump into the pool.
INT. POOL – DAY
Katherine and Abigail fondle each other’s boobs, while Ronald treads water in the deep end of the pool.
RONALD
Abigail, are you staying for dinner?
ABIGAIL
Yes I am Ronald. Thank you.
KATHERINE
Yes, she is, thank you Ronald.
RONALD
That is great. I am making
wieners for dinner tonight.
Katherine and Abigail both frown. Then they kiss each other on the lips.
KATHERINE
Oh no, Ronald, that is not
good news.
ABIGAIL
No it is not good news.
RONALD
Why is that Katherine and Abigail?
KATHERINE
Abigail is a vegan.
RONALD
Is that so Abigail?
ABIGAIL
Yes Ronald that is so.
Ronald looks puzzled again.
RONALD
That is so what Abigail?
ABIGAIL
What?
RONALD
You said that is so…
ABIGAIL
So what?
Katherine now looks puzzled as well.
KATHERINE
Now Ronald don’t you be mean to
our guest. Abigail is also spending
the night with us so you be extra nice.
Ronald looks very happy now.
RONALD
That will be very fun Abigail.
ABIGAIL
Yes it will Ronald.
RONALD
What about the wieners?
KATHERINE
Ronald, you know that I am
a carnivore.
RONALD
Yes Katherine, we are both
carnivores.
Ronald looks even more confused now.
RONALD (CONT.)
Abigail do you like my meat?
ABIGAIL
I don’t like any meat Ronald, I’m
a vegan.
Katherine laughs.
KATHERINE
Silly Ronald, she doesn’t like any
meat she’s a vegan…and a lesbian.
RONALD
Is that true Abigail?
Abigail blushes.
ABIGAIL
Well yes sillypuss, everyone
knows that vegans don’t like meat.
RONALD
What about lesbians?
ABIGAIL
What about lesbians?
RONALD
Lesbians can eat meat.
ABIGAIL
When I became a vegan I also became
a lesbian…or was it when I became a
lesbian I also became a vegan? I can’t
remember. I don’t like meat wieners.
RONALD
Will you have sex with us tonight
Abigail? You are very attractive.
Abigail blushes again.
ABIGAIL
No, but I’ll have sex with Katherine
While you cook your wiener.
Ronald looks to Katherine.
KATHERINE
Sorry honey, but Abigail doesn’t like
Any meat. You should become
a vegan and then we’ll all be happy
together.
RONALD
That is all it would take?
ABIGAIL
Yes, if you were a vegan I would
have sex with both of you.
Ronald has an idea. He gets out of the pool, his stiffie leading the way. He goes over to the foliage and pulls out a giant eggplant from the garden. He carries it past the two ladies and into the house.
Both women look confused.
KATHERINE
Ronald, what are you up to, you
old goat you?
We hear sounds like a power drill inside the house. Both of the girls giggle like school girls.
LATER
Ronald walks out with a big smile on his face. The giant eggplant covers his schlong and sticks out in front of him.
RONALD
I am now a vegan. Can we all
have sex now?
Abigail laughs while Katherine laughs also.
ABIGAIL
I don’t like eggplant either. I’m
allergic to dairy products.
Katherine laughs again.
KATHERINE
Oh Ronald…
The eggplant falls off his member and into the pool.
FADE OUT: