BORN FREE
(A Brief History of Man)
THE VIEWS AND OPINIONS EXPRESSED IN THIS WORK ARE ENTIRELY THOSE OF THE AUTHOR. NO ONE ELSE IS TO BE HELD RESPONSIBLE FOR THEM. THE AUTHOR ADVISES CAUTION WHILE READING THE WORK.
A PRELUDE
“This life is what you make it. No matter what, you're going to mess up sometimes, it's a universal truth. But the good part is you get to decide how you're going to mess it up. Girls will be your friends - they'll act like it anyway. But just remember, some come, some go. The ones that stay with you through everything - they're your true best friends. Don't let go of them. Also remember, sisters make the best friends in the world. As for lovers, well, they'll come and go too. And baby, I hate to say it, most of them - actually pretty much all of them are going to break your heart, but you can't give up because if you give up, you'll never find your soulmate. You'll never find that half who makes you whole and that goes for everything. Just because you fail once, doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything. Keep trying, hold on, and always, always, always believe in yourself, because if you don't, then who will, sweetie? So keep your head high, keep your chin up, and most importantly, keep smiling, because life's a beautiful thing and there's so much to smile about.”
― Marilyn Monroe
My life, indeed one woman’s relentless pursuit of peace and happiness reads like a song…
Every unique experience in the journey called “Life” indeed that in my own case has been the lyric of a song. I have also come to fervently believe that LOVE is the most powerful phenomenon, and that God is the most powerful truth on Earth!
Consider this; by the grace of the Lord, I have matured into a sincere and conscientious young professional interested in the study of the Liberal Arts and decoding the true meaning of Peace and Non-violence…
I have never been the usual couch potato, but of late I have been leading mostly a sedentary life which could have been torn to shreds if it had not been for a strange phenomenon called LOVE.
Indeed, my last 16 years have been one of tremendous emotional and physical pain and suffering. In the year 1997, I underwent Depression following completion of my studies from Delhi University. There were various factors underlying the same, especially the loss of an overseas scholarship. In 1998, I went to Orissa (India) to work with a corporate NGO, but my condition deteriorated and I had to return home. Life by then had taken a strange turn, with a plethora of blood tests, ECTs, doctors (including Advanced Homeopathy which has had a very positive effect no doubt) but nothing I repeat has truly healed me. I always dream about humanitarian service as a call of the Lord, but have largely been a sick child. I have taken drugs like Alprax and Lithium. I am also not recovering from my phobias and tension especially a deep phobia of flying and distant and overseas travel.
My psychological health has also deeply affected my physical health and weakened the system. Indeed, I went through Bronchial Pneumonia once and hemorrhoids. I am also slightly obese which is causing numerous problems in the lower limbs. I am currently undergoing my menopause at the age of 38.
I remember the time I first learnt of terms such as Counseling and therapy versus aggression and violence (during a brief visit to a practicing physician when in college in Delhi, India), I was a bit curious, considering the immense importance I was attaching to them (the terms). I was wondering whether these terms had something (in fact, anything!) to do with self- instability, about which I had nurtured strong feelings ever since I was in school. I was pleased to know that THEY DID INDEED, LOOKING AT THEM MY WAY. A visiting Counselor had advised us to follow a “VOCATION OF THE HEART”, or, in other words, choose a profession that would be based on what one heard from one’s conscience. It would be conceptually, as it was said, “work with feeling”….
With time, there were questions (related to contemporary issues, largely War/Conflict in Developing Economies) that were to start haunting me, more so as I happened to be a developing country national. Some of these would have been like the following: How best could reduced World military spending be channeled into social development? Why would innocent children, such “innocent flowers” be forced into conflict? Could Law intervene to bring about progressive social change? Would social change be an effect or a cause???? And, why would people commit “Crimes against Humanity”, as during War and/or Ethnic Conflict? The issues that haunted the then “young mind” were endless. I was in a state of utter confusion.
It was following my undergraduate studies that I started looking at these issues from the grass root level(s). The question was: How could one alleviate them?
Despite an overwhelming and powerful physical and behavioral challenge (indeed several such challenges), I started working for these “hapless” people. I started moving about with them. I started breathing the very air that they breathed. I started assimilating their problems as if these were mine. I could feel the change in me. The person, who wore the shoe, knew exactly where it pinched! I started feeling (emotions) for them. I started hoping for them. I STARTED GETTING, WELL, INVOLVED WITH SMALL HUMAN RIGHTS, PEACE AND SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT ISSUES AND INITIATIVES. However, I would still be hoping…
But hopes would not be castles in the air. These would need to be developed on a logical foundation so that they could be transformed into reality. They would need nurturing and caring…. SAY, FOR INSTANCE, higher education …could open up the door(s) to the mind. They could be a gateway for understanding the cause effect relationship… they could give an insight for questioning our basic norms, our accepted principles, at the same time, laying the foundation for an approach towards challenging age old social traditions/taboos/concepts and/or idiosyncrasies …
I could then, for instance, study fresh political, philosophical, social and scientific perspectives PRIMARILY ON THE “PARENT ISSUE”, WHICH I LATER LEARNT, WAS CALLED “PEACE/HUMAN RIGHTS//SOCIAL JUSTICE”; indeed control of gross violations; how to practice such work in intergovernmental and international organizations as well as in current issues and controversies, with a much-anticipated exposure to the global human rights and stability situation. Another closely-related area would be CONFLICT RESOLUTION. Its nature would make it not just an object of study, but a matter of policy, intervention and practice as well. We would be motivated to think about and do something about these very issues.
It was only now (much to my satisfaction), that I could gather more specialized knowledge in the field, particularly, one that each of us hoped to choose for our respective objectives. There would, presumably, be scope for exposure to key international debates over a “Policy in the Indian and global scenario”… Moreover, some of us, coming from nations of the World (and, as in my case, India), where those like GANDHI, have walked across the Land, would really have much to gain, from, as I noticed, a Study/PRACTICE of the concept of ‘Non-Violence’…
In fact, I am myself preoccupied with and strongly wishing to work to unearth the causes underlying the absence of peace, beginning on the firm conviction that there would be hardly any, if at all, instability, if “We” were to guarantee a better (in terms of food, drinking water, medical care, education, and yes, much-needed love and affection!) world to our children, our future…In other words, were “We” to concentrate on the marginalized and poverty-stricken, I guess there wouldn’t be much need for conflict and post-conflict reconstruction…
Because I have been “DISTURBED” by what I have seen, namely, visual images of undernourished, thin or lean, wasted and emaciated CHILDREN in places as diverse as Uttar Pradesh, Orissa and Jharkhand states in my desperately impoverished nation, India OFFCOURSE, WITHIN THE BOUNDARIES OF MY (OWN) HUMAN LIMITATIONS!
I STRONGLY BELIEVE IN “SOLIDARITY BETWEEN NATIONS”, AND I HAVE NO DOUBT, WHATSOEVER, THAT WITH MUCH-CHERISHED SUPPORT, I COULD BE WHAT I WANTED TO BE SOME DAY!
I would like to make certain general comments about conflict/development and welfare/peace and non-violence, as I would see them. A study of them would involve the world we lived in, and why it were the way it actually were. Facts as quoted after studies would be mind-boggling: "Ten million more people will stay poor…due to the events of September 11th". The goal of the new Millennium should be the “Development Goal” of 'eliminating' World Hunger. When we read the papers, watched TV or listened to the news, we would be bombarded with images of the poor, of wealth, fame and power, and, obscene conflict. These would be issues that needed to be looked at not only by Human rights and/or Welfare practitioners (including Economists and Governance specialists) but us OURSELVES as well. This would be the greatest challenge for the coming generation…. This would be the question for which we would need an answer for the new world that is emerging, like work with refugees, for instance…
These would be my thoughts and comments. I do realize that there are certain issues that merit immediate attention, and these would include poverty, ecological damage, war and conflict, gender inequality, and that, the fact that these issues existed, made for the immense importance of this discipline(s) (of welfare/policy and good governance) to contemporary society…
I GUESS WE WOULD THEN, TOGETHER, BE ABLE TO CONTRIBUTE TO THE ATTAINMENT OF PEACE AND HARMONY AND THE COMPLETE REALIZATION OF THE DREAMS OF THOSE WHO FORMULATED THE “UNIVERSAL DECLARATION OF HUMAN RIGHTS”.
THEY SAY, “TINY DROPS OF WATER MAKE UP THE OCEAN”. I STRONGLY BELIEVE IN THE “RIPPLE EFFECT”. LET EACH ONE OF US CONTRIBUTE HIS/HER BIT! ONLY THEN CAN WE MAKE THE WORLD A MORE PEACEFUL PLACE TO LIVE IN…!!!
BORN FOR FREEDOM, LIBERTY, EQUALITY & FRATERNITY, I FINALLY REALIZE THAT’S WHAT WE ARE IN THE FIRST PLACE…”
LOVE…thy fellow beings, indeed every one of God’s beautiful creation. BELIEVE in the power of love…to touch and heal minds, hearts and souls…
True LOVE knows no boundaries of religion/belief; or nations and flags and borders. The only passport will be our heart(s)!
Hatred is an ugly word…so start LOVING!
CHAPTER 1
PLEASE FORGIVE ME
“It takes a strong person to say sorry, and an ever stronger person to forgive.”
- Unknown
Forgiveness is an Art very few are actually capable of. Gandhi had once famously remarked: “"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong."
Explaining the truth of this statement, I must confess that I may have in the past either consciously or sub-consciously hurt someone without being able to relate to his/her pain and suffering. It could have been in my past life and as an ordinary mortal (Hindus believe in re-incarnation), I have been subjected to gruesome consequences as a result of my past “KARMA”…
As a mortal, my weak mind and spirit have indeed lacked the courage to forgive. After all, it takes more than courage to get past any previous offence or hurt caused either deliberately or unconsciously to someone…it could be anyone. The meaning of reason has eluded me to such an extent that I’ve always considered having an alibi for what possibly could have been (if not entirely) my fault.
Often out of low self-esteem, I have been unable to forgive, instead I have sought to be revengeful and negative (though not in a harmful manner) instead of being positive. I have not been able to put my differences aside…bad “Karma” I might once again safely assert.
Okay. Imagine a scene, where someone has done a lot of harm to you...what do you do? The main feeling that comes to you is that 'one day I'm going to get him'. You want revenge, because you were weak, you could not stand his atrocities, and you could not stand the pain he caused you.
Revenge, anger comes from weakness. If you were a strong person, people can do no harm, because you do not let yourself get harmed (another Gandhi quote: Nobody can make you unhappy or weak WITHOUT YOUR CONSENT). The things they did made no difference to you, and even if they did, you have the 'strength' to stand up and keep walking again (if you were a billionaire, would you mind if somebody took a dollar from your account?).
Not wanting to harm the person who harmed you releases your soul from a cage, a cage on whose bars are written "I got to have revenge". It's never easy.
Revenge destroys both, the person who harmed, and the person who had revenge. Forgiveness blesses both: the person who harmed is free, and the person who suffered ultimately has happiness.
We are living in testing times: Everyone wants to have revenge…
The aim of this treatise is not to confuse love with forgiveness yet love, forgiveness, a mutual tolerance and more compassion for our fellow beings will most certainly make for a happier planet!
A word here on the intense and brutal pain and suffering inflicted on me by MOST IN MY IMMEDIATE FAMILY EXCEPT my mother and my two kind and loving lady doctors. I still crib no doubt, yet have discovered in forgiving a beautiful passion, indeed it is in the mysterious equations of love that I have found my true calling.
Thus, if I may have in this book hurt your feelings/sentiments either consciously or unconsciously, PLEASE FORGIVE ME. For I am only an ordinary mortal. It was never my intention in the first place, yet my circumstances were so trying that I failed to forgive at times and some of the scars inflicted still remain.
Only time can heal these scars. And we have recently survived an Armageddon of sorts!