More Virginia Stuff

(Just because you write doesn’t make you an expert)

Let’s get to the point! Today’s entertainment is provided by Walter Nicholls, Washington Post Staff Writer. You know the Washington Post, that bastion of Democratic Liberalism and made-up stuff that has kept us annoyed and laughing for years. They’ve kept their reputation intact by printing Virginia is for Wine Lovers,With 80 Wineries and More on the Way Virginia Wants to Be the Next Napa, which appeared on October 23, 2002, as the headline story in the Food Section. This article turns out to be a wonderful advertisement for the Virginia Wine Industry. I wonder how much Virginia Wine Marketing, a division of the Commonwealth’s Department of Agriculture, paid him? If he was compensated with Virginia wine I think he got screwed and not in a nice way.

Be that as it may, this feature is a prime example of someone writing about what he really doesn’t know or understand, sound familiar? Think you’re reading a prime example? Anyway, the article accurately discusses that there is a proliferation of wineries in Virginia, numbering 29 in 1985 to more than 80 today and possibly 20 additional by 2005 (at last count Napa was up to over 330) and then drawing similarities between Virginia and California. Also compared is Virginia Tech to UC-Davis as the states’ respective wine experts. Boy that’s a jump for Tech going from cow tippers to oenologists; at least they both deal with farming. Finally the article deals with three examples of who is getting into the grape stomping business and some interesting facts and details. He also muses that maybe someday the eastern foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains may someday be called “Napa of the East.” Sure, just like Lefty said Maryland would be the “UCLA of the East” (editor’s note: Maryland did win the NCAA last year, just not under Lefty Driesell). (Editor’s note: The previous editor’s note was from WinoMike. Not from me, the real Editor!)

In a further effort to tout Virginia wines, two experts are quoted; both are much respected individuals in the wine industry and their endorsements are non-endorsements. Michael Mondavi of Robert Mondavi Winery is quoted as saying he has “periodically tasted” Virginia wines over the years and “I’ve seen consistent improvements” and local expert and Washington Post columnist Michael Franz states that “There is a greater clarity of flavor and a truer taste of the grape variety, with fewer flaws” but he shies away from any Virginia to California comparison. These heady words will make you want to run out to your local ABC Store and buy out the Virginia wine section. The author also called Michael Mondavi a “pioneer of winemaking in America”. I believe that the author has him confused with a guy named Robert. Michael who actually is the corporate leader of the various Mondavi enterprises; at least that is what they told us at the Mondavi tour this past summer. Brother Tim is the wine maker.

One similarity that is not pointed out between Virginia wines and Napa wines is that their pricing structure is very similar. Way too much! Do you detect a theme here? However, what is not similar is that the quality of Virginia wine is not even in the same universe as Napa or a pant load of other wine producing areas. Case in point, Patricia Kluge of Kluge Estate Winery and Vineyard, one of three wineries cited in this article, is selling a Virginia wine called ”2000 New World Red” for $495 per bottle! Not case, bottle! She says she has already sold six bottles. In her defense the bottle of wine comes in a wooden box designed by some British guy. Is it that precious? Then, drum roll please, in January there will be a brut–style sparkling wine on sale for a mere $35. Now don’t even ask me what the hell a brut-style sparkling wine is? Must be some new kinda grapes. Can someone clarify this for me? By the way, the author says Ms. Kluge, the former wife of billionaire John Kluge who is, among other things (Ms. Kluge not Mr. Kluge), a former belly dancer. I think if you check the facts a belly dancer is a nice way to say stripper. Bada Boom! Or is that Bada Bing? What else is odd is that Ms. Kluge is still using the billionaire’s name even though the article points out she has remarried an IBM executive who is not named Kluge. What this last tidbit of information has to do with this article I’ll never know.

In conclusion Virginia is for Wine Lovers because the District of Columbia has some of the most knowledgeable wine salespeople and most cost competitive pricing of wine in the United States and it’s only a 45-minute drive.

Keep slurping!

WinoMike

Northern Virginia

November 2002