Accountability Partners
By Hal Baumchen, Psy. D., L.P.
1. Be willing to be accountable in regard to specific issues, areas of concern, or habitual sins or struggles.
2. Find one person who can consistently serve as your accountability partner.
3. Use a same sex person for your accountability partner.
4. Do not use a spouse or other family member as an accountability partner.
5. Ask a trusted, respected, committed Christian whom you believe will be supportive, non-judgmental, and committed to prayer.
6. Accountability is a biblically based principle that allows us to feel supported, breaks bondages that are fueled by secrecy, provides guidance, and enables others to pray. Part of the power of an accountability partner is knowing that what I do in private will be shared with my partner in the next day or week.
7. The accountability partner is not a trained counselor. He or she should probably not try to “force” you to stop a behavior. An accountability partner is committed to help you be actively listening, offering prayer support, and providing a “safe” place to share your struggles. Ultimately, you are responsible for you actions.
8. Accountability partners must maintain confidentiality unless they think you or someone else is in imminent, serious danger. If you as the accountability partner are unsure about what to report, discreetly get advice without breaching confidentiality. You can call a Christian counselor or crisis line to help you make this determination.
9. Accountability must be specific in order to be helpful. Asking someone, “How are you?” is insufficient. Develop a set of 3 – 10 questions, which are written out and kept by each partner. Seek information about progress rather than perfection.
You may use this procedure in person or over the phone. Keep it short and simple. The power of this procedure is in the asking of the questions, not the answers.