Bear One Another's Burdens, and So Fulfill the Law of Christ. (Gal 6:2)

SUNDAY SEMINARY: COUNSELING

April 2016

COUNSELING

Program

“If anyone wants to be my disciple, let him renounce himself and take up his cross and follow me” (Mk 8:34))

“Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” (Gal 6:2)

COURSE OBJECTIVES

This course is designed to help you understand the privilege and responsibility you have to help other believers live the Christian life. It will equip you with the Biblical knowledge and practical resources you need to be an “Instrument in the Redeemers Hands.”

COURSE OUTLINE

Instruments in the hands of the Redeemer (chapter 1-3)
Getting to the heart of the matter (chapter 4-5)
How to be more helpful (chapter 6)
Love: Building relationships (chapter 7-8)
Know: Getting to know people (9-10)
Speak: Speaking the truth in love (11-12)
Do: Formal counselling (13-14)

Break for Easter (25 March)

Overview: How people change
Getting help: Resources at your disposal
Essential Do’s and Don’ts

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES

Paul David Tripp, Instruments in the Redeemers Hands: People in Need of Change Helping People in Need of Change, P&R Publishing, 2002.
Wayne Mack, A Fight to the Death: Taking Aim at Sin Within, P&R Publishing, 2006
Joel Beeke, Overcoming the World: Grace To Win the Daily Battle, P&R Publishing, 2005.

LESSON ONE

INSTRUMENTS IN THE REDEEMER’S HANDS

1: SYNOPSIS

“Many of us would be relieved if God had placed our sanctification in the hands of trained and paid professionals, but that is simply not the biblical model. God’s plan is that through the faithful ministry of every part, the whole body will grow to full maturity in Christ…The paradigm is simple: when God calls you to himself, he also calls you to be a servant, an instrument in his redeeming hands. All of his children are called into ministry, and each of them needs the daily intervention this ministry provides.” (Paul Tripp, Instruments in the Redeemer’s Hands, 9)

2: WHAT IS WRONG?

“If you are going to help someone, you need to know what is wrong and how it can be fixed…This is where our culture gets it completely wrong. In rejecting a biblical view of people, the world eliminates any hope of answering the “what is wrong?” question accurately. And if it wrongly answers this question, how can it possibly provide a proper solution? Why do people do the things they do? Is my problem fundamentally an informational one? Will a well-researched, logical set of insights provide the solution? Or is my problem fundamentally experiential? Will dealing with my past solve my problem? Is my problem fundamentally biological? Will helping me achieve chemical balance solve my problem? Or is there something beneath all these things that is more deeply wrong with me? Scriptures answer to the last question is a clear, resounding, “Yes!”” (Tripp, Instruments, 9)

Romans 3:10 as it is written: "None is righteous, no, not one; 11 no one understands; no one seeks for God. 12 All have turned aside; together they have become worthless; no one does good, not even one

According to this verse what is the problem with people?
How pervasive is the problem?
In what sense have we all become “worthless?”
What is the evidence of our fallen condition? (Rom 3:13ff)

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“The Bible says that our core problem, the fundamental reason we do what we do, is sin. Scripture is defining sin as a condition that results in behaviour. WE are all sinners, and because of this, we all do sinful things.” (Tripp, Instruments, 10)

What does Psychology say the root or cause of our problem is?

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“Because sin is my nature as a human being, it is inescapable. It marks everything I think, say, and do. It will guide my cravings, my response to authority, and my decision making. It will alter my values, direct my hopes and dreams, and shape every interpretation I make. If you are going to deal with your own difficulties or assist others who want to deal with theirs, you must correct wrong thinking. Yes, you must deal with the suffering of the past and ways the body isn’t functioning properly, but you must do more. You must help them conquer the sin that distorts all these experiences.” (Tripp, Instruments, 10)

3: HOW CAN IT BE FIXED?

What is God’s solution for the weakness of the flesh according to Rom 8:1-11?

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What must a Christian do when we fall into sin?

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What must a Christian do to enable us to overcome sin?

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How does a Christian exercise and strengthen the muscle of faith?

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4: Can we change on our own?

“The problem is that most of us think that God is carrying around a very small toolbox! A successful carpenter uses many tools, each on designed for a particular job. God has a huge toolbox, and his principle tools are his children. Sadly, many people in the church do not see themselves this way. They think of ministry as something for the paid professional. When they think of their own involvement, they don’t think very far beyond saying a prayer or making a meal. Yet their adoption into the family of God was also a call to ministry, a call to be a part of the good work of the kingdom….The overall biblical model is this: God transforms people’s lives as people bring his Word to others.” (Tripp, Instruments, 18)

According to Eph 4:11-16 how does the body grow to maturity in Christ?

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“The combination of powerful truth wrapped in sacrificial love is what God uses to transform people…The bottom line is that you cannot have a relationship without being a person of influence. You give and receive counsel every day. It is not a task of paid professionals; it’s woven into the fabric of human relationships. The problem is that we don’t often recognize the powerful impact of those everyday encounters.” (Tripp, Instruments, 21, 46)

What are some of the things that hinder us from being used to minister to others in the way described above?

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“The sad fact is that many of us are simply not biblical in the way we use the Bible! Being biblical does not mean merely quoting words from within its pages. Being truly biblical means that my counsel reflects what the entire Bible is about. The Bible is a narrative, a story of redemption, and its chief character is Jesus Christ….The overarching story reflects the fact that our problem as human beings is deeper than the individual sins we commit each day, creating the specific problems that complicate our lives. Our deepest problem is that we seek to find our identity outside the story of redemption….It is because our sin problem is so pervasive and so deeply ingrained that we need more from Scripture than insight, principles, understanding, or direction…We need something that will change us from the inside out – we need Jesus Christ.” (Tripp, Instruments, 27)

LESSON TWO

THE HEART IS THE TARGET

1: SYNOPSIS

“Why can your toddler be so contrary? Why did your friend get up in the middle of the conversation? Why is your teenager so angry? Why is Amy swallowed up by depression and despair? Why do you get angry in traffic? Why is that once-romantic couple now engaged in guerrilla warfare? Why is Bill driven in his career? Why is Sue so critical and controlling? Why does George speak so bluntly and unkindly? Why is your daughter so afraid of what her friends think? Why does Pete refuse to talk? Why do people do the things they do? The simplest, most biblical answer is the heart…. You cannot understand a human being without understanding the heart. So what does the term describe? The Bible uses “heart” to describe the inner person.” (Tripp, Instruments, 59)

2: What is the heart of man?

“Scripture divides the human being into two parts, the inner and outer being. The outer being is your physical self; the inner person is your spiritual self (Eph 3:16). The synonym the Bible most often uses for the inner being is the heart. It encompasses all the other terms and functions used to describe the inner person (spirit, soul, mind, emotions, will, etc.). These other terms do not describe something different from the heart. Rather, they are aspects of it, parts or functions of the inner person. The heart is the “real” you. It is the essential core of who you are… Because the Bible says your heart is the essential you, any ministry of change must target the heart.” (Tripp, Instruments, 59)

Luke 6:43-45

In this passage Christ compares people to fruit trees.

What does the fruit represent?
What does the tree represent?
What is the point he is making?

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“Jesus’ point is that a tree has the kind of fruit it has because of the kind of roots it has: we speak and act the way we do because of what is in our hearts… In many ways we deny this connection and blame people and circumstances for our actions and words. Here Christ calls us to humbly accept responsibility for our behaviour. He calls us to humbly admit that relationships and circumstances are only the occasions in which our hearts reveal themselves… If my heart is the source of my sin problem, then lasting change must always travel through the pathway of my heart.” (Tripp, Instruments, 62)

3: Where should we focus our efforts to change?

Matt 23:23-28

In this passage, Jesus is condemning the Scribes and Pharisees.

What is he criticising them for in 23:23-24?
What is he criticising them for in 23:25-28?
What does he command them to do in 23:223,26?

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Give some examples, from daily life, of how we try to deal with externals rather than the heart

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4: What is our Essential Heart Problem?

Ezek 14:1-6

In this passage, the elders of Israel had come to enquire of the Lord from the prophet Ezekiel. They had questions for which they wanted answers, decisions which needed to be made, insights which they required, in order that their plans might succeed. God however instructs Ezekiel not to help them until they deal with the idolatry that is in their hearts. According to this passage:

Where are idols established?
What is the result of having set up idols in their hearts?
How many idols do the people have?
Why will God not answer them in the way they desire?
What does God instruct them to do?

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Give some examples of idols we set up in our hearts and the ways we worship them?

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“An idol of the heart is anything that rules me other than God…Sin is fundamentally idolatrous. I do wrong things because my heart desires something more than the Lord… Our hearts are “idol factories” and our words and actions are shaped by our pursuit of the things our hearts crave….To make matters worse, this idolatry is hidden. It is deceptive; it exists underground. We can make this great exchange without forsaking our confessional theology or even our observance of the external duties of the faith. So we hold onto our beliefs, tithe, remain faithful in church attendance, and occasionally participate in ministry activity. Yet at the level of what we are really living for, we have forsaken God for something else. This is the silent cancer that weakens the church, robs individuals of their spiritual vitality, and leads to all kinds of difficulty in relationships and situations.” (Trip, Instruments, 66)

Note: Heart idolatry can be well hidden behind external obedience/religion (Is 29:13)

Matt 6:19-24

Everyone seeks some kind of treasure
Your treasure will control your heart
What controls your heart will control your behaviour
There are 2 kinds of treasures, earthly and heavenly – whatever treasure we choose will become our rulers.

5: What are the signs of heart idolatry?

James 4:1-10

Our lives are full of conflict of various kinds. According to this passage:

What lies behind all human conflict?
What makes these desires wrong?
Why will God not allow these desires to be fulfilled?
What is God doing to help us?
What does God command us to do with our idolatrous desires?

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“You and I are always desiring. Desires precede, determine, and characterize everything you do. Desires get you up in the morning and put you to bed at night. Desires make you work with discipline to get one thing done, and run as hard as you can to avoid another. Desires sculpt every relationship in your life. They are the lenses through which you examine every situation. At the foundation of all worship whether true or false, is a heart full of desire.” (Tripp, 78)

Give some examples of how and when good desires become idolatrous desires in our lives:

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“Our spiritual battle is a war for the heart. When that war is won, people behave in ways that please their Creator. God will never be satisfied with the crumbs of externalism.

LESSON THREE

how to be more helpful

1: SYNOPSIS

“Being an instrument of heart change means following Christ’s example and focussing on the heart – starting with your own….starting with your heart means understanding and submitting to God’s calling, which will shape your life and relationships. God has called us to nothing less than incarnating Christ to others.” (Tripp, 96)

How do we sometimes become an obstacle to effectively helping other people?

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2: Called to show god’s glory (Jn 1:14,18)

In 1 Jn 1:14,18 what has Christ come to do in the incarnation?

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“The incarnation gets right to the heart of the struggle because it confronts people with the one thing that can make a lasting difference, the glory of God. The revelation of God in his awesome glory is the only thing that exposes the utter emptiness of all the other glories we crave….Personal ministry is not just about confronting people with principles, theology, or solutions. It confronts people with the God who is active and glorious in his grace and truth, and who has a rightful claim to our lives. Only as our hearts are transformed by this glory will the principles of Scripture make any sense to us.” (Tripp, 99)

The text says that Christ came full of “grace and truth.” What implications does this have for the way we minister to other people?

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“Since the central character of the great story of Scripture is Christ, a central theme of the story is grace. It must be a central theme of our personal ministry, biblical counselling, and discipleship as well. We point people to a God who not only sets the goal for their lives, but who enables them to do what they have never done before…Personal ministry must not be reduced to a set of principles to live by. Its central focus is the Redeemer who rescues people from the power of sin and progressively eradicates its presence from their lives.” (Tripp, 99)

“People are changed by seeing Christ in new ways, ways that reveal the bankruptcy of their own agendas and the emptiness of the glories they seek. Their most important encounter is not with the counsellor, but with Christ. We are there to set up that encounter.” (Tripp, 103)

Practically, how do we make sure that people encounter Christ and not merely Christian principles?

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2: Called to be ambassadors (2 Cor 5:14-6:2)

“Our lives do not belong to us for our own fulfilment. The primary issues is, “How can I best present the King in this place, with this particular person?”… We represent God’s purposes to the people he placers in our lives. This is much broader than a commitment to formal ministry occupying a portion of our schedule. It acknowledges that our lives belong to the King. But this is where we get ourselves into trouble. We don’t really want to live as ambassadors. We would rather live as mini-kings…If we were honest, we would have to confess that the central prayer of our hearts is ‘my kingdom come.’ ” (Tripp, 105)

What motives do we have for getting involved in other people’s lives other than the “love of Christ?”

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How does lack of love for Christ hinder us from being an effective ambassador?

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How should the fact that we are representing Christ change the way we try to help others?

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“As an ambassador, I will represent:” (Tripp, 107)

The message of the King.
The methods of the King.
The character of the King.

3: love, know, speak and do

“These words do not represent a four-step process. They are not phases of a personal ministry relationship, as if you start at the first (Love) and push people through until the last (Do). They aer simply four elements of biblical ministry. Although there is some logic to the order, you will be doing all of these things simultaneously as you seek to be the Lord’s ambassador.” (Tripp, 109)

Love

“Love highlights the importance of relationships in the process of change. Theologians call this a covenantal model of change. God comes and makes a covenant with us. He commits himself to be our God and he takes us as his people. In the context of this relationship he accomplishes his work of making us like him. As we understand the way God works in our lives, we realize that relationship to him is not a luxury, but a necessity. It is the only context in which the lifelong process of change can take place. In the same way we are called to build strong relationships with others. God’s purpose is that these relationships would be workrooms in which his work of change can thrive.” (Tripp, 110)