Stay with the poor
Sr. Teresa Ma, Little Sisters of the Poor
As Little Sisters of the Poor, our mission has always been to provide hospitality to the needy elderly. For all of you here who have a good will to promote the human dignity, we would like to say Thank You to you for we have the same goal and vision as Christian, also as health care provider and promoter. How we promote the human dignity in our daily life with the elderly? I would like to use the reference in the catechism of the Catholic Church Itsaid: The dignity of the human person is rooted in his creation in the image and likeness of God; The divine image is present in every man. It shines forth in the communion of persons, in likeness of the union of the divine persons among themselves. From here we can understand, why we need to respect one another. It is simply because God is in us … We are created in the image of God… As our Foundress remind us always: “Never forget that the Poor are our Lord”. The vocabulary- Poor- for our foundress mean specially the elderly. She sees the Lord in them. It is why she can go all the ways to give care to the poor until the limit of the gift of her-self. In 1839 a winter night she received the first old blind, paralyzed woman who suddenly found herself alone.
This act committed her forever. The congregation of the Little sisters of the poor – with its unique mission of hospitality to the elderly – was born!
Since we are taking care the old people , very often I will come across these questions, when the relatives seeing the love one in long term illness , in the stage of total dependence , can not have any communicate with others . They will ask what the dignity of life in this stage is. They will ask again and again; is it worthy to continue to come and see their family and is it worthy to keep life go on like that? Usually I will ask them; Do they love their father / mother? Why they still come every week to see he /she? The answer is because they love them. I think they already answer their own question by answering that they do love their family. The respect of human is first of all because we love another human being. By loving care for the a long term sickness elderly, we are giving them , their proper dignity as they are one of us, although the inability physic. The same when we feel that we loved and appreciated, we find ourselves worthy. In some way, the long term illness and dependantelderly, their dignity is much depend on the health care giver how they respect their dignity. As for us Little Sisters we will remind ourselves always “The Poor is our Lord.”
We must be convinced that each elderly person “remains a person, even in a state of physical or mental decline. A person does not lose his /her dignity, either because of a condition of dependency in advanced age or because of the judgment of others…” As Little Sisters we are committed to promoting the dignity of human life and each and every one of our residents. We believe that the wisdom and potential of the elderly ‘are even greater and more remarkable when they are surrounded by esteem and respect, when they feel accepted, when their suffering are alleviated as much as possible and they are helped to live this stage of their existence which is old age, and that moment, that event of life which is death.
As we follow the legacy of hospitality which our foundress Bld Jeanne Jugan left to us- caring for the whole person. We try to attend to the physical and medical needs of the aged. The role of medical and nursing personnel in promoting the well-being of each residents is critical, we try to provide the best medical and nursing care available – including promoting of health and wellness, timely diagnosis and treatment of problems, effective pain management and strive to up grad the medical standard in our home but yet bear in mind “a professionalism that does not include the skills of serving human dignity is no professionalism at all”, we need have this radical conviction at the center of it all that health care is the care of person not biological system alone. So many time, in the fulfillment of duty and the medical order we do not consider the opinion and the feeling of the elderly, they just become an object for seek of practice. So above all we would like to make our home is a community of healing and compassion, the care offered is not limited to the treatment of a disease or bodily ailment but embraces the physical , psychological, social and spiritual dimension of the human person… That mean let our resident know that they are loved, respected and they are appreciated.
The loneliness of the elderly, one of them said: “The deep pain of the poor is that no one needs our friendship.” We can give them shelter, feed, cloth and care for them, without making them happy. So what means that “making the poor happy” as our foundress said. Which is rescuing them from their anonymous solitude, giving back to them a name and face, prompting them to be open to a new awareness of themselves and their dignity. To do all that , we must love them, granting them the quality of gaze and attention that would make them aware of their dignity, of their greatness as sons and daughters of God.
Old age is a stage of life – it is not an illness which is a nature process so therefore the most natural place to grow old is at Home. “Home” always is a place where we can be ourselves, where our gifts are appreciated and our weakness accepted. Elderly resistance to institutional care is derived from the fear of losing one’s autonomy understood as personal independence, freedom and choice. So we try to keep our home , more “ home feel” to attain this goal by employing means adapted to each person, to his /her possibilities, tastes, past life, health, etc. Having a center of interest, doing something they like to do ,feeling useful, being able to take initiative, to communicate, to form friendship , maintaining facilitated relationship with the family, having contacts with youth … these are factors which provide joy and happiness. by letting our residents participate some light work and occupation in the daily routine of the home, example help to gather up the dishes after meal time , peeling the skin of the vegetable or make handicraft for sell . All the participation is free choice.By these small occupations, some of the residents rebuild their self esteem, which help them to understand that enter an old age home which is not end of the active life but it is only another beginning of life and their relationship with other will not be stopped by the walls of the old age home. By keeping in touch with people outside the home, the residents can feel more integrated into the life and the people around them. It is also stimulating and helps them maintain their mental and psychological balance. For the visit of the children and teenagers, both young and old benefit from such encounters, since the young share their joy and spontaneity with the elderly, while older persons are for the young precious teachers of the lesson of life.
To help the elderly maintain their sense of dignity and appreciation for life is the reason for our attention and care, first of all of their person- proper hygiene, good grooming ( hair style, Shaving, etc) ; then of their clothing – clean, appropriate, properly fitting; of their environment- cleanliness, beauty, peacefulness; of their belongings – leaving them the right and freedom to dispose of their personal effects, These are all small, desire to express our respect, do much to promote the cause of life and the desire to live in these people who are now in the last phase of life on earth.
The care of the dying has always been the summit of our apostolate. Our hospitaller vocation has always directed us towards the care of the very ill residents, who are in the final stage of their lives. The church encourages health care workers to alleviate the suffering of the sick. Without actually saying that we offer “Palliative care”, in the strict sense of term, we are striving towards it, encouraging the family to participate when this is possible ,as well as the other residents. Everything is done to comfort the sick and the attentive and understanding presence of those around them makes them feel loved and not abandoned. Pope Benedict has written that “The true measure of humanity is essentially determined in relationship to suffering and to the sufferer. He encourages all of us to take our place as brothers and sisters beside those who are ill and dying and bear their sufferings inwardly though compassion. When death gradually approaches, the elderly need more than anything else to have “someonetakes care” of them. We ( caregivers, little sisters ) no longer situate ourselves in action but in being, in the quality of our being. In my experience real peace reigns so often in the bedside of the dying elderly , where the family comes even more willingly since the little sister is there if need be. In this ultimate phase, how many things remain unsaid until then, how many expression of affection or regret are manifested at these moments, how many reconciliations. We can say that in these circumstances, death takes on its true dignity;it is the confident placing of one’s life into the hands of the one from whom it was received.
However, all these can be achieve, it is because of the help of so many people, volunteer doctor and nurses who offer precious help and always give a great confidence in us.
In following the teaching of the church and the sprit of the Congregation , we continue seek to foster the dignity , well-being and happiness of the elderly in new and creative ways. We would welcome the collaboration of all those who wish to join us in providing hospitality to the needy aged: Residents families, staff, volunteers, Our Association Jeanne Jugan members, benefactors, profession consultants. Not only does such collaboration contribute to the effectiveness of our mission, but we believe that it is a concrete way of realizing God’s desire for communion and solidarity between persons.
1