The social mixer in our washbasin
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Nicholas Blincoe
The Guardian, Wednesday 1 April 2009
If you ever wondered what the world really thinks of Britain, the answer comes with a new Facebook group: "You are not an advanced country if you have separate water taps." The idea that a washbasin should have a single mixer tap unites people across the most intractable divides. Poles and Russians, Americans, Arabs and Iranians all want to know why the British choose to scald and then freeze their hands, rapidly alternating between two faucets. Why do we do it? When I answer, "We don't - we either use the cold tap or the plug," that only strengthens their newfound commonality. And their frank disgust with me.
The Facebook group has links to an ingenious Kurdish doctor who demonstrates how to improvise a DIY mixer tap with a plastic bottle. Elsewhere on the web, a German discussion group ponders how the British cope, with one bright Teutonic spark pointing to a BBC report that one in four commuters has faeces on their hands and suggesting: Sie waschen sich nicht die Hände (they do not wash their hands).
I have had so many tap-related arguments, I clearly know too many foreigners. I learned the hard way not to mention the larger truth: while the rest of the world is addicted to running water, the British can be found soaking in baths and washing their crockery in froth-filled bowls. Anyone who lives in Britain long enough finds out the truth for themselves. A Syrian friend of mine cringes when English supper guests offer to wash the dishes. She cringes but accepts, then has to spy around the doorway to make sure they rinse under fresh running water. As she says, "Why spend all that money on organic food, and then eat detergent?"