Sexual Identity

Divine Design Series #3

“Sexual Identity” = essence of being a man or a woman. Sexuality has to do with how we express ourselves as a man or a woman in relation to others. Our sexuality can be expressed without sex!

Question: Why is this important today? = “What does it mean to be a man or a woman? Do you know? Can you define manhood? Is it just a matter of my physical make-up?What does it mean to be feminine?

If you are raising a boy, what do you tell him it means to be a man?
If you’re raising a daughter, how do you mentor her in being feminine?

In our culture... total confusion (ie., Bruce Jenner)

Not thinking clearly on this. Contrast Bruce Jenner to Rachel Dolezal (who pretended to be black). How is their thinking not the same?

Proposition: Sexuality involves more than just our bodies, it involvesour souls. In fact, our sexuality is a major part of our identity, and it effects the way we approach life.

TWO CHRISTIAN APPROACHES TO SEXUALITY

Egalitarians: Emphasize the complete and thorough equality of men and women to the extent that there are no innate differences between men and women other than biology. They don’t have separate roles or sexual identities.
Complimentarians: This group also sees men and women as equal, but different. Men and women have equal worth, but they also play different roles in the world.

THE DIVINE DESIGN FOR MEN AND WOMEN

Genesis 2:18 Then the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him."

Genesis 1:26 Then God said, "Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness; and let them rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over the cattle and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth." 27 God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. 28 God blessed them; and God said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky and over every living thing that moves on the earth.

* God’s design is that men and women are equal but different.

Equal

Both men and women were made in God’s image

We have personhood (distinct from the animals)
We have self awareness (we can reflect on our lives)
We have creativity
We have will and responsibility

Both were given the command to subdue and rule the earth

Stewards (not owners)
Partners in using the earth’s resources wisely

Both men and women were commanded to be fruitful and multiply

And IN Christ, as we stand before God, there will be no hierarchy, no greater or lesser, no helper or head... all are equally valuable and of worth.

Galatians 3:28 There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free man, there is neither male nor female; for you are all one in Christ Jesus.

POINT: If you are a Christian, you reject the notion of men being superior to women in any way.

Crux Issue: Is this ALL the scripture has to say about sexual identity?? If this is where the gospel message on sexuality ends, then WHAT IS BEING MALE AND FEMALE? If we are only biologically different, then there is no soulishness to our sexuality. It’s just personality and preference.

Different

Genesis 2:18 Then the LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him."

The phrase “suitable for him” indicates equality, the word “helper” denotes difference. .Over and over again the scripture repeats this pattern.

The man is the HEAD... implying leadership, oversight, and responsibility
The woman is the HELPER... implying support, nurturing, and encouragement.

Is this Patriarchal? Just cultural? If this was just cultural, Jesus would have corrected it. Yet he affirms this pattern by choosing 12 male disciples. He treats women with dignity and they are involved in his ministry, but He guides them into a different role.

Key passages: I Corinthians 11:3, Ephesians 5:22-25, I Timothy 2:12. The reasongiven for these role difference is not cultural but theological!

OBJECTION: If men and women are not allowed to do the same things, then they are not equal. Equal means “the same”.

ANSWER: The Trinity! The Father is the “head” of Christ (I Cor. 11:3) and Jesus submits to his leadership (read the gospels!). The Son also sends the Holy Spirit. This is the doctrine of procession. No orthodox Christian would say that the Father, Son and Holy Spirit are not equal, or are not made of one nature and essence. They do however have different roles. Our relationship of equal but different is patterned after the Trinity. (see Philippians 2: 5-11)

TRUTH: The different roles of men and women trace back to the beginning, BEFORE the fall of man, to the place where God’s original design is seen.

VISION OF MANHOOD AND WOMANHOOD

Definitions from “Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood”, Piper and Grudem

Definition of a MAN: at the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead, provide for and protect women in ways appropriate to a man’s differing relationships.

LEAD, PROVIDE, PROTECT. In one word: INITIATE!

Be a servant leader
Don’t force your leadership on anyone (Did Christ do that? No way!)

Definition of a WOMAN: at the heart of mature femininity is a freeing disposition to affirm, receive and nurture strength and leadership from worthy men in ways appropriate to a woman’s differing relationships.

AFFIRM, RECEIVE, NURTURE. In one word: EMPOWER

Even if you’re in a position of leadership over men (as doctors, lawyers, judges, principals, etc), never leave your femininity behind. Lead like a woman, not a woman trying to be a man.
Do men feel like more of a man around you or less? Are they empowered or humiliated?

CONCLUSION:

IF there is a Creator who Designed men and women to be a certain way, and ...
If in His word He says “This is how I want you to relate to each other”...
THEN we should not aim to see how often we can get around his guidelines...
Rather... we must KNOW what it means to be who He created us to be...
Celebrate who we are instead of trying to change who we are...
And teach our children who they are as a man or a woman!