Encountering Conflict 2013
http://jonswilliams.wikispaces.com/
Text list (2 must be taught)
· Brecht, Bertolt, Life of Galileo (1)
· Greene, Graham, The Quiet American (2)
· Hillman, R & Mazari, N, The Rugmaker of Mazar-e-Sharif (A) (4)
· Paradise Road, (Director: Bruce Beresford) (A) (3)
Style and Form
· Expository
• Essay
• Feature Article (magazine, newspaper, journal)
· Persuasive
• Letter to the editor
• Editorial
• Speech
· Imaginative
• Short story
• Dialogue between characters
Audience
What I have found over the past few years teaching Creating and Presenting regarding the importance of audience is the following. The more defined the audience is when the student is writing, the more defined their piece of writing becomes. (Ironic isn’t it how the overwhelming majority of students choose to write in the somewhat generic expository essay style/form.) Think about this: if the student knows who they are writing for this is going to shape their language, expression, content, approach.
The most asked question – But how do I make it different to a text response?!
The way texts are read and studied in the Creating and Presenting area of study is markedly different to how texts have been traditionally studied. The chosen texts must read through the lens of ‘Encountering Conflict’. The student must be able to identify what conflict is represented, who becomes involved and what factors influence their involvement.
Also… a student can write an excellent piece (for example) without detailed historical background of the culture in the text, as long as they respond directly to the prompt, writing appropriately to style and form and use the selected text as the basis for their piece of writing. The intention of Creating and Presenting is to reward good writing.
Creating and Presenting is about allowing students to write in a style and form that best suits them. As teachers, we guide students as they discover their favoured method of writing.
High level Sample Expository Essay
Here is a high level expository essay. This demonstrates how the text (The Rugmaker of Mazar-E-Sharif) is seamlessly and purposefully integrated into this more formal writing approach. You will find this sample piece @ http://jonswilliams.wikispaces.com/
Prompt: ‘We all have a responsibility to take an active role in the conflicts around us.’
This piece is written as:
mode(style): expository
form: first person formal essay
When I was young, I once toted guns made of plastic, and felt a thrill as I sighted down my crooked barrel. The click of the trigger brought honour and glory, and no game compared to war. Yet as the years pass, I begin to realise the potential horrors of conflict. Bullets are no longer plastic, war no longer a harmless game. Its legacy is often not of the glory, adventure and honour I once imagined, but of shell-shock, courage and atrocity. Sadly, the blights of conflict are not only death and destruction, nor is its insidiousness exclusive to the clash of swords or the buzz of bullets. The boiling pot of conflict also brings to the surface some of humanities’ most detestable attributes as they partake and are actively responsible [Responding to the prompt] for brutal conflict. However, a person’s active responsibility in conflict may be for the better, and in other cases avoiding it is best. To watch the fiery flames of the furnace is to observe the mystery of humankind’s responsibility in conflict: it either blackens and burns, or refines in its absence or participation.[Excellent introduction, providing a clear point of view and directly responding to the prompt.]
Another mystery is the stars. I often look up to them and wonder what humanity must sound like from the heavens. Surely it must be a symphony of tears and screams; for ironically, that which is common to us all destroys us all. The crimson thread of conflict, endured by every race and people, is the clash and clamour that divides and degrades. It is these sorts of conflicts that we should not hold the responsibility to take an active role [Responding to the prompt]as it is only to result in pain and bloodshed. The Rugmaker of Mazar-E-Sharif, by Najaf Mazari and Robert Hillman, explores this concept. The protagonist, Najaf Mazari, has grown up in Afghanistan, a land which has long been divided by international, tribal and civil war. [Clear knowledge of the text] The reality of Afghanistan as being a land of conflict has simply become a fact of life to its people where ‘safety’ is only an illusion. The bitter war between the Afghan resistance, the Mujahedin, and Afghanistan’s Russian-backed communist government has been one of the key causes of conflict. Both sides wished to recruit every young Afghani male they could get their hands on. Najaf informs us that to be caught simply means certain death in battle. The war between these two forces has produced devastating effects on the people in Afghanistan, where neither side were concerned about innocent civilians and acted with no real conscience. It was simply a struggle to power and as a result countless have been killed and maimed in their continuous battle. Surely innocent people do not have the responsibility to partake in such horrific violence, in the acts of callous and dangerous slaughtering others. Sadly, in this case, it is the innocent that suffer by being forced to take an active role in the tragedy that is Afghanistan.[A clear and powerful paragraph; the prompt was directly responded to.]
While stars only hear one cacophony, it is conflict on the individual level [Development of point of view/argument] where it is often most potent. Najaf recounts encountering conflict at its worst when he is captured and brutally, repeatedly tortured by the Taliban. It is important to note Najaf’s identity and situation as a Hazara. Traditionally in Afghanistan has been ruled by the ethnic majority, the Pashtun, whom the Taliban is largely constituted of. Cultural conflict lies at the root of the Taliban, and like a fire proves a spark, being a Hazara meant trouble with this group was unavoidable. Hence Najaf has two choices: [Response to the prompt and direct use of the text] to attempt to fight against them, or to flee. The term ‘fleeing’ may hold cowardly connotations, however it is critical to understand that Najaf holds a responsibility to himself – to remain alive, and in doing so he is able to support others, such as his beloved family. [Strong argument] The chances of taking the ‘safe’ option to leave his country were greater than escaping the Taliban. It is essentially this responsibility that means he does not take an active role in the conflict in Afghanistan. [Thoughtful insight]
But to return to the analogy of fire: [Clever link, clearly in control of the shaping and development of ideas] without its purifying and regenerative force, refined gold would not exist. There are times we should consider when we have demonstrated responsibility to take an active role in conflict. Consider also the wind – it may blow and howl and break the branches of the tree, and many have been felled by its gust. However, what drives the roots of the tree deeper? What makes it stronger? In life we must all experience times of testing. While sometimes it may not be the safest option, one still has the responsibility in other circumstances to stand up and take responsibility in times of trail and suffering. This responsibility is not always negative. Away from war, as an Australian, we know of the conflict between our global humanitarian obligations with border security – our nation’s desire to protect its borders from illegal intrusion. [Good link to the text] Playing on our fears and insecurities is the incident on September 11 of the terrorist attacks on the New York World Trade Centre. Whilst we may be afraid, it is stories like Najaf’s that remind us of the violence and bloodshed in other countries and the desperate plights of refuges and harrowing journeys to escape it. As compassionate and empathetic humans, we have, to an extent, the responsibility to help these people, who are fleeing from persecution and war, who eventually arrive on our shores. Najaf asks readers [Rich knowledge of the text] to imagine if suddenly there were no Australians left and it was up to the refugees incarcerated in detention centres to rebuild society. His answer is simple – the refugees would become the new generation of Australian with all their passion and hope for the future there would be artists, scientists, mechanics, and like all societies, there would exist elements of the criminal class. Najaf urges readers and our authorities to consider the humanity of refugees and accentuate how asylum seekers have become victims of the broader conflict, the war on terrorism, [Excellent link to previous ideas] which has affected the way Australia encounters refugees. While we fear terrorism and terrorists, it is up to us as a nation to act responsibly and take a role in such conflicts.[Ideas are skilfully developed. Arguments are shaped with insight.]
When I was young I not only toted guns, I also aspired to the stars. I have learned that I have the responsibility to partake in some conflicts and avoid others. [A most effective return to the point of view]Previously mentioned were the stars, the wind and the flame. All these are elements of nature which share in common of humankind, conflict and their source of life. The fire is born of friction, the wind of struggles between warm and cold air, and the stars of heavenly explosions. [Colourful language] All are useful – the furnace refines, the wind propels, and by the stars humans have navigated for centuries. [Sophisticated ideas] Likewise, I will inevitably encounter a time where I must make a decision[Effective return to the prompt] regarding my responsibilities to take an active role in a situation of conflict, be it safe or not. I do not have the responsibility to participate in acts of violence and destruction; however as a human being I am inclined to help others actively in times of need, even when the situations may be deemed as dangerous. From this I can only surmise that responsibility may be a gift or sin granted in encounters of conflict, and it is ultimately up to us to use it wisely.
The exam
Assessment is based on the interrelationship among:
· the quality of writing in relation to the specified purpose
· the handling of the prompt
· the quality of ideas (this, of course, is formed by the study of the Context and from the texts studied)
Students presented a range of approaches to writing in their responses. While the expository approach was still the most popular, it was evident that students are being encouraged to choose an approach that best suits their writing and thinking. There continue to be fewer bland textual responses. (We have just looked at a sample expository essay that expertly navigates this form of writing and avoids being a ‘bland textual response’. It was pleasing to see the varied and imaginative ways that students were able to explore the Context, the nominated text and the prompt. Students who wrote excellent responses were obviously thinking about responding to the prompt as written. They used their understanding of the text(s) and concepts from their Context study to inform the ideas they explored within their writing.
The less successful responses did not think critically about the idea that the prompt was communicating or ignored the prompt altogether.
Students should not come to the examination with pre-prepared responses relating to the concepts/issues central to their Context study and ignore the idea the prompt is communicating.
(I would suggest, however, that it is perfectly acceptable and indeed something that I encourage, for students to have identified the style and form that they will be writing in for the exam. For example, one high scoring student chose to write a letter adopting the persona of Deputy Governor Danforth from The Crucible. What this student did so well was always responded directly to the prompt.)
The prompt should be seen as a springboard for effective writing; the ideas of the prompts must be explored. It is important that students have an exact understanding of the core of the prompt.
Use of text
While students are free to create a response that is an expository, persuasive or imaginative piece of writing, the piece itself must explore the nominated Context and respond to the prompt offered for that Context…Encountering Conflict.
In addition, the instructions are quite clear about the expectation of the connection of the response to the student’s nominated text.
It is expected that the study of the texts forms the basis of a detailed exploration of the Context.
While many classrooms supplement the study with a variety of other material, and this is a rich way to develop an exploration of the central ideas in the Context, the more specific aspects of the study of Context comes from the selected texts.
This is why I suggest starting with a 3-5 lessons on introductory activities looking at the general concept of encountering conflict and from thereon to focus directly and specifically on the text being studied. Certainly draw parallels and examples from the conflict encountered in the text, but when the student writes about conflict encountered it has to be directly related to the text or an idea coming from the text. Students must ensure that the connection between the piece of writing and the nominated text is discernible and central in the ideas of their pieces.