Self-Appreciation and Self pleasure
Self-Appreciation is considered in the scientific psychological classification, one of the human strengths and virtues of character. Self-Appreciation can even be measured and assessed. Many types of psychologist, who are interested in positive psychology, clinical psychology, personality, and social psychology, engage in studies attempting to understand how people of all ages appreciate themselves.
Self-Appreciationcannot be separated from other essential psychological attributes, especially when we are talking about sexual relations with our partners. I’m referring to accepting and appreciating our own body. As a partner we can help the woman we love, if we are aware of the effect our words and body language have on her, both in and out of the bedroom. This body appreciation relationship will help women to positively accept and appreciate their own body. And isn’t that what we truly wish for our lover? To help her see herself and her body as beautiful and sexy as we see her.
In a recent study in the Journal of counseling psychology, the researchers divided 800 women into 3 groups of different ages. 2 groups of young adults (between 18-25 and 26-39 years old), and one group of middle aged women (between 40-65 years old).
They discovered not only does body acceptance by others (being in a body appreciation relationship with your partner) help women of all ages to appreciate their body. This positive relationship will even help your partner to avoid holding onto bad eating habits as intuitive eating. Social support is so important and the most meaningful support is the kind we get and receive from our partner. From the researcher’s comparison between age groups, they discovered the older adult women; those between 26-65 years are much more influenced by negative remarks from others, which can lead them to bad eating habits. While younger adults between 18-25 years had a more positive body and self appreciation, they could actually resist being influenced, and adopting an observer’s perspective helping them to engage in a good appreciation relationship with their partners.
Keep in mind a good sexual relationship starts with positive remarks and body language towards our partner’s body. Never stop saying and treating your lover as the sexiest most beautiful women in the world. She will appreciate your kind words but even more important she will always have self-appreciation bykeeping this belief about herself. This may last even as the years go by and her body changes.
What’s good sex?
Let’s talk about self pleasure and masturbation. This is important for self appreciation as you will soon discover. But first how would you define good sex? Good sex doesn’t have one single definition; each and every one of us has his or her personal interpretations for good sex. These are based on our personal history, our first sexual experiences, social and personal attitudes towards sex, our family, our education and our sexual preferences. Of course all of these are an inseparable part of our personal definition for good sex.
This is true for a specific period in time. Our sexuality changes as the years go by; our sexuality at 16 isn’t even similar to our sexuality at 45.
Self pleasure
The best way to get to know your sexuality is by masturbation. When we love ourselves, when we know our body responses to what feels good, we are actually giving a gift to ourselves. Masturbation is the first step towards a successful sexual relationship-and a great way to show each other how to have a good time.
Wouldn’t it be great if we could talk freely about our masturbation habits, but most people don’t even feel comfortable to talk about sex, not to mention, masturbation.
We literally search in the dark, without knowing: are we pleasing our partner, does this fell good or not?
We can begin by asking our partner what they like. Unfortunately in most cases you’ll get the common answer: well I don’t really know. So you can try discovering the answers together by trial and error. This can be quite fun if both you and your partner are open to new experiences, and have a relationship with open communication between the two of you.
Self pleasure in 4 hands
Masturbation in front of your partner has an element of putting on a show, and if this is the case, why not have a general rehearsal before hand? You can do it with the use of a mirror. Don’t concentrate on a better performance; rather check how open you are. Right in front of the mirror, is the best place to check things out. If you find difficulties masturbating in front of yourself, you’ll find it so much more difficult to masturbate in front of someone else.
This is where we return to the main concept of this article-self appreciation. While learning to masturbate in front of the mirror, with only yourself in the room, you can determine how much self appreciation you have of yourself and your body. Self-appreciation is an essential step towards your partner fulfilling your expectation to be accepted and appreciated.
Is there perhaps another way? Maybe after we learn alone we can just show our partner how we masturbate? Masturbation in front of your partner has many advantages, and is of course fun and arousing. By being a bystander you can learn without the need for words and explanations, how your partner likes to pleasure him/her self. There is no better way.
A few creative ideas-use your imagination
* You can play a game, by being children and daring each other-you show me yours, and I’ll show you mine…
* You can turn your bedroom into a stage in a club. Imagine your partner is a stripper in the club, and you are sitting in the audience watching the show. The next time you can switch roles or even invite a real stripper…
By giving in to your partner’s sexual advances, and allowing your partner to loose him/herself in masturbation in your presence, you will begin a wonderful process of openness and authenticity and you are guaranteed to have doubled the pleasure.