WEAMIS ref (office only)

ND/DO/DEE/(do)

Workers’ Educational Association, Northern District

Please use when, all other forms being completed, you feel formless and incomplete. This provides a new form to your day. Please retain one copy and send the top to the District Office and the second to someone you know who may be in need.

TO / PDO / FROM ...... (Name) Your Ref No ......

Subject/(or recipe you would recommend) ......

WEA Branch? ‘Yes please’  ‘No thank you’ 

Project? ‘Why?’  ‘Why not?’  What is your favourite no? ......

When did this Start? ...... When will it End? ......

How much time is left? ...... (enter number of hours) What’s it all for? ...... (enter C of E)

Is there any way out? Yes  No 

Category ...... (Please enter shoe size and hair colour)

No of sessions ...... Miles per Hour ...... Total ...... *

*(please help, if you possibly can)

Key Issue: ...... Inside leg ......

Options (if new) ...... Excuses (if any) ......

Other problems ......

Preferred codes/ postcodes and invoice numbers ...... Toothpaste ......

(If there are alternatives, please attach them on a separate sheet of paper with reference numbers, address(es), telephone numbers, advantages and disadvantages.)

Partner ...... Relationship ...... Partner’s Preferences ......

Is the WEA to claim the credit/blame? Credit  Blame 

Maximum ...... Minimum ...... Somewhere in between ......

Yes  No  Sometimes  Your Capacity ......

Subject ...... Object ......

Meaning...... Purpose ......

Target ...... (Please enter your lucky number) Has all this been accredited? Yes  No 

Please enter accrediting body ......

And their accrediting body ......

Delivery mode (please tick one box and cross another) Short 

Medium  Long  Very long  Interminable  Shady 

Blocked  Rounded  Open  Closed (On Sundays)  By prior agreement 

“Only Forms are real. All else is a pale illusion.” (Plato)

Categories

1 Minding your own /someone else’s/ Business

2 Meaning and Forms

3 Anxiety and Aimlessness

4 Boredom and Mindlessness

5 Loafing and liveliness

6. Undirected/directed loathing

7 Intermediate sloppiness

8 Certificated Indoctrination

9 Advanced Life Skills

10 Coping with Saintliness

11 Art and Craftiness

12 Assertive Mediocrity

13 Individual/ Collective Insanity

14 Gargling for Beginners

15 Strategic Silliness

16 Other Subjects

Primary Target student groups

1 Socially and / or educationally disturbed people

2 Noisy fat cats / Clever people who talk loudly in restaurants

3. Deserving/undeserving /forward thinking fiddlers

4 Readers of socially depraved newspapers

5 Criminals/ bullies / awkward / anti-social people

6 Sad adults who exercise regularly

7 Activists/ pacifists/ militarists/ magicians

8 Single Priests with an illicit liaison

9 Trailing elderly with obedient children

10 Disadvantageous men with amoral careers

11 Escaped Prisoners (safe/dangerous)

12 Really nice, tethered, people

13 Elderly sheep penned into forms

14 Goats who hate forms but will digest them

15 Incredible people who fill in the gaps

16 Excluded Gorillas who will fill you in

17 Members of unethical communities

18 Co-opted associates of Frail Trade Unions

19 Desirable / derailed / disadvantaged / depressed

20 Introverts (tattered/untattered)

21 Fremasons / Funny people / Alternative / Born Again / Dead / Dull / Devious

22 Not worth targeting or tethering / already tied up

23 Refugees/ Survivors of earlier targeting

24 Targeted, but nimble/ heavily armoured

25 Disadvantaged /Lame ducks / flustered / untethered

26 Bald, kneecapped, tarred, feathered, extruded

27 Attractive, shallow persons with pedigree dogs

Published in Reportback Vol 2, No 16, 1998