Relationship ManagementSpectrum The Personality Disorder Service for Victoria
Adapted from “Relationship Management of the Borderline Patient”By David Dawson, M.D.
Harriet L. MacMillan, M.D.
Early Childhood to Current ContextConceptual Leap
So far we've associated personality disorder symptoms to developmental deprivations
oinvalidating environments,
oearly childhood abuse,
oneurobiological developmental implications
Relationship Management
While holding to a rich developmental formulation of personality disorder, treatment intervention is focused less on developmental origins and more on current enactments
Unstable presentations are seen more in the light of iatrogenic reinforcement within treatment systems
Dramatic and Dysregulated states the considered the product of the interplay between patient and treatment context.
The Self-System
Those who have consistent “good enough” relationships, throughout childhood and adolescence, developed self systems that are relatively
ounconflicted,
ostable,
oclearly boundaried
This leads to normal regulating capacities
oemotions,
othoughts
orelationships
This is due to there being a set of stable experiences that are effectively encoded into both explicit and implicit memory systems.
These guide internal and external states.
This provides a stable flow of historical (internalised) experiences which in turn allows for a continuous stable self-definition
Personality Disordered People and Early Relationships
The Impaired Self-System.
This leads to conflicted, unstable, poorly boundaried past experiences lack an internal reservoir of stability.
Memory systems are impaired (implicit memory particularly so), and they suffer associated neurobiological deficits that impair emotion regulation
Self systems relating to continuity, unity, embodiment and agency are impaired.
Without the reservoir of inner stabilising experience, they are inordinately dependant on current time interpersonal relating for self-definition.
Without relationship on tap they easily panic and become symptomatic (e.g. abandonment anxieties)
BUT…
In the absence of historical warmth safety and reciprocity, their experience of relating is one of a battle ground for survival and control
Relationships quickly become the place where maladaptive relationship strategies are enacted
Conundrum: self system not adequate for autonomous functioning thus need for literal presence of “other”, but early maladaptive relating quickly becomes activated in relation to other, creating withdrawal and alienation. (Freud - repetition compulsion: Pavlov - conditioned response)
Maladaptive Relationship Strategies
Argument
Passive resistance,
Non-cooperation,
Threats,
Chaos,
Self-harm
Suicidal enactments
Conclusion:
Here and now relationship is desperately and repetitively sought to compensate for poor internal capacity for self definition
Without this client becomes anxious and symptomatic (abandonment anxiety).
But the very relationship vital for self definition becomes quickly characterised by re enactments of early dynamics: argument, passive resistance, non-cooperation, threats, self-harm etc.
Emerging Relationship Dynamic
CompetenceIncompetence
Inter-DependencyArgument
Intimacy Passive resistance
Spontaneity Non-cooperation
Awareness Threats
Responsibility Chaos
Stability/Permanence Self-harm
Suicidal enactments
Three Goals of Relationship Management
•Do no harm
•Reduce chaos and curtail the distorted relationship between patient and health care institutions
•Consider Therapy
The worst and most damaging behaviors of personality disordered patients occur when the competence - incompetence dynamic is being enacted
“Incompetence” behaviors become dangerous currency in the repetitious negotiation over control and power
The aim therefore is to stimulate switch from patient incompetence to patient competence.
Switch Method - “No-therapy” Therapy
Therapy often becomes the unhelpful arena for enactments of the competence - incompetence dynamic power play (repetition compulsion)
Yet withdrawal of helping relationship elicits extreme abandonment anxiety as the patient becomes desperate for a “self defining relationship
Offering a form of therapy without the content addresses the relational need while avoiding the competence-incompetence dynamics
Dawson and MacMillan call this “No Therapy” Therapy
“Not-therapist’s” Role
The Therapist is inherently caught up in distorted interpersonal negotiations i.e. he/she assumes stance of responsibility, control and competence leaving the client in their favored role of incompetence
The “Not-therapist” explains to clients that their job is not to help… but to determine what kind of help they might benefit from, what they want, from this or other agencies.
No Therapy Assumptions
It is assumed that the patient is responsible and competent person.
Patients are given ultimate control over the definition of their problems and proposed remedies.
Proposed remedies that promote or reinforce the patient’s assumption of incompetence are not taken up.
“Not therapist” needs to tolerate personal doubts and anxieties…it will take time for the client to end the currency exchange (give up the repetition) and adopt competency.
The “no-therapy” therapyoffer:
Regular contact “Not sure if I have any useful advice, but I could listen”.
Emphatic neutrality without anxiety or concern.
No probing, uncovering, offering advice, guidance and interpretation.
No access or only very limited access hospital admissions
“Not-therapist” in order to aid client and distance her/himself from the therapist role, spends time noting, clarifying, specifying and defining the client’s problems and wishes as they revealed; nothing can be left vague and abstract.
Demands or threats are often met with benign silence followed by limited inquiry such as “so …what might help right now”
Slowing down the pace of interview and using silence can help patient switch to competency.
Suicidal Impulsiveness.
The directive, problem solving approaches used successfully with acutelysuicidal clients can actually increase risk of self-harm and suicidal behavior with chronicallysuicidal personality disordered clients
Leading to a battle over power and control
Leaving the client with a sense of relationship loss (anxiety symptoms)
Reinforcing the idea that the client needs to be rescued (incompetence)
Self harm therefore needs to be tolerated
Hospitalization is reserved for management of acute symptoms of high prevalence mental illness (typically psychosis, major depression).
Requires specialist psychiatric evaluation
Prerequisites for Applying This Model
A belief that client is at least potentially competent and responsible.
Self Awareness; must not use this approach as covert way of getting rid of patient.
Compliance with organisational context (roles, policies, tolerances)
Regular external supervision or consultation.
Whole system agreement with approach to prevent conflict, mixed messages and splitting.
Stance and Techniques
Avoid assigned role position (power-competent)
Always assume the client is a responsible, competent adult
Overtly present and discuss the social contract
Assume a warm benign but neutral position
Overtly set absolute limits or boundaries according to agency role, resources and polices
Set consequences you are able to deliver
Be carefully honest
Apply principles to all issues (medication, mutilation, suicide impulses, drug/alcohol abuse, length of sessions
Bring family members and other helpers, other agencies and third parties into the approach if possible
Otherwise apply the same management principles to them.