249.2: (D&C Gospel Doctrine Lesson 27)

“They Must Needs Be Chastened and Tried, Even as Abraham”

Hook / How do we cope when things don’t turn out the way we hope or expect? What is God’s role in all this?
Goal / To model thoughtful engagement with difficult issues in the scriptures, even pushing back and challenging them when necessary.
Overview /
  • Framing thoughts
  • Detailed engagement with the assigned scriptures
  • Some context on Abraham and Isaac
  • How we deal with mistakes and disappointment
  • Reflections on suffering

Conclusion

Remember our “challenge and be challenged by the scriptures” motto? Well, it is time to challenge. I am going to be pushing back against and “challenging” the scriptures a great deal this lesson. In fact, it is this specific example that motivates the motto of this podcast. Explain it is a sensitive issue and I will respect that. We are on the sacred ground of tender aspects of the human experience. It is not too extreme to say scriptural interpretation can be a matter of life and death, especially when severe depression or mental illness come into the picture. This story confronts us with a fundamental philosophical question: Can we believe in a God whose commands betray our deepest understandings of what is good and right? Or must we reject such a God? I would submit we are doing it wrong. (Can God command us to do what we believe to be ethically wrong? How could we be sure it is God commanding us?)

Going to spend quite a bit of time carefully discussing the scriptures because they bring up key issues

Points to address

Tackle the titular verse:

The story of Abraham offering Isaac and how we talk about it

In what ways is the idea that God “chastens and tries us” helpful? In what ways is it harmful? (Let’s examine this theology)

Discussion of Zion’s camp

How Zion’s camp is talked about at Church

How do we deal with choices and sacrifices that don’t work out as we expect?

Persecution then and now

What we can learn from the early Saints’ efforts to build Zion

How we can build Zion today

Human sacrifice in the Bible

  • Don’t sacrifice your children to Molech/God is angry because people do (Lev. 18:21; 20:2-5)
  • Solomon builds a sanctuary for Molech (1 Kings 11:7)
  • Josiah destroys one (2 Kings 23:10)
  • Jeremiah tells of Judeans sacrificing their children to Molech (Jer. 32:35)
  • “make a son or daughter pass through fire” is likely a euphemism for child sacrifice (Deut. 18:10; 2 Kings 16:3; 17:17; 21:6. Ahaz and Manasseh are accused of this).
  • Many intriguing passages that suggest sacrificing children to the God of Israel may have been an accepted practice (Ex. 13:12 for example, which would explain all the other passages)
  • The daughter of Jephthah (Judges 11)
  • The Moabite crown prince (2 Kings 3)
  • Abraham and Isaac?

Maxwell different kinds of suffering

For next lesson:

Use this? At least use quote about crisis:

Discussion Reading points:

  • (101:2) If God can suffer afflictions to come upon us, can he stop them? Does that mean all suffering occurs with his permission?
  • In depth discussion of the Abraham and Isaac story. This gets at the heart of what the scriptures are and how we use them.
  • (101:7) Why would be God be slow to answer our prayers?
  • How do we understand the interrelated approaches of patience and being still, obeying the laws of the land through purchase and appeals for restitution, and violence and vengeance?
  • (103) What do we make of the failure of these prophecies to be fulfilled?
  • How do we understand what could be seen as victim blaming in these sections? (things didn’t work out because you weren’t good enough)
  • What is the role of punishment and suffering in learning and forgiveness?
  • Can we truly only be close to God through hardship?

Brene Brown:

There's a great quote that saved me this past yearby Theodore Roosevelt.A lot of people refer to it as the "Man in the Arena" quote.And it goes like this:"It is not the critic who counts.It is not the man who sits and points outhow the doer of deeds could have done things betterand how he falls and stumbles.The credit goes to the man in the arenawhose face is marredwith dust and blood and sweat.But when he's in the arena,at best he wins,and at worst he loses,but when he fails, when he loses,he does so daring greatly."

…Shame drives two big tapes --"never good enough"and, if you can talk it out of that one,"who do you think you are?"The thing to understand about shame is it's not guilt.Shame is a focus on self, guilt is a focus on behavior.Shame is "I am bad."Guilt is "I did something bad."How many of you,if you did something that was hurtful to me,would be willing to say, "I'm sorry. I made a mistake?"How many of you would be willing to say that?Guilt: I'm sorry. I made a mistake.Shame: I'm sorry. I am a mistake.

There's a huge difference between shame and guilt.And here's what you need to know.Shame is highly, highly correlatedwith addiction, depression, violence, aggression,bullying, suicide, eating disorders.And here's what you even need to know more.Guilt, inversely correlated with those things.The ability to hold something we've done or failed to doup against who we want to beis incredibly adaptive.It's uncomfortable, but it's adaptive.

Courage, the original definition of courage,when it first came into the English language --it's from the Latin word cor, meaning heart --and the original definitionwas to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart.And so these folkshad, very simply, the courageto be imperfect.They had the compassionto be kind to themselves first and then to others,because, as it turns out, we can't practice compassion with other peopleif we can't treat ourselves kindly.And the last was they had connection,and -- this was the hard part --as a result of authenticity,they were willing to let go of who they thought they should bein order to be who they were,which you have to absolutely do thatfor connection.

The other thing that they had in commonwas this:They fully embraced vulnerability.They believedthat what made them vulnerablemade them beautiful.They didn't talk about vulnerabilitybeing comfortable,nor did they really talk about it being excruciating --as I had heard it earlier in the shame interviewing.They just talked about it being necessary.They talked about the willingnessto say, "I love you" first,the willingnessto do somethingwhere there are no guarantees,the willingnessto breathe through waiting for the doctor to callafter your mammogram.They're willing to invest in a relationshipthat may or may not work out.They thought this was fundamental.

This is what I have found:to let ourselves be seen,deeply seen,vulnerably seen;to love with our whole hearts,even though there's no guarantee --and that's really hard,and I can tell you as a parent, that's excruciatingly difficult --to practice gratitude and joyin those moments of terror,when we're wondering, "Can I love you this much?Can I believe in this this passionately?Can I be this fierce about this?"just to be able to stop and, instead of catastrophizing what might happen,to say, "I'm just so grateful,because to feel this vulnerable means I'm alive."And the last, which I think is probably the most important,is to believe that we're enough.Because when we work from a place,I believe, that says, "I'm enough,"then we stop screaming and start listening,we're kinder and gentler to the people around us,and we're kinder and gentler to ourselves.

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