The Ribbles Build a Residence

THE RIBBLES BUILD A RESIDENCE

ACTOR 1

TODAY OUR STORY IS ABOUT THE A-B-C’s. ARCHITECTURE, BUILDING AND CONSTRUCTION. CAN ANYONE TELL ME WHAT AN ARCHITECT DOES? ( TAKE RESPONSES) NO HE DOESN’T BUILD THE BUILDING HE DESIGNS THE BUILDING. THAT WORD DESIGN MEANS A CREATION OF A PLAN FOR THE CONSTRUCTION OF AN OBJECT LIKE A HOUSE. DOES ANYONE HERE HAVE A ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD YOU CALL HOME? WELL I’M GLAD TO HEAR IT. DID YOU BUILD IT YOURSELF? I DIDN’T THINK SO. LONG BEFORE YOU LIVED THERE MAYBE EVEN BEFORE YOU WERE BORN YOUR HOUSE WASN’T THERE AT ALL. IT WAS JUST A PIECE OF LAND WITH GRASS AND DIRT AND TREES BUT NOW IT’S GOT DOORS, WINDOWS, FLOORS AND CEILINGS, ROOMS TO SLEEP IN, EAT IN, WATCH TV IN AND BATHROOMS TO DO ALL KINDS OF THINGS IN. HOW DID THEY GET THERE? WHO DID IT? WELL LET’S FIND OUT. I’M SURE WE’LL NEED SOME HELP TODAY CAUSE BUILDING A HOUSE TAKES A LOT OF WORK. OUR STORY STARTS AT THE WEDDING OF IMA AND URA RIBBLE AND WE NEED A VOLUNTEER TO MARRY US. CAN ANYONE READ US OUR INSECT MARRIAGE VOWS? (CHOOSES SOMEONE AND HANDS THEM AN INDEX CARD WITH THE LINES PRINTED ON IT. POSITIONS THE PERSON AT C.S.) THANK YOU ______NOW EVERYONE ELSE WE NEED SOME MUSIC CAUSE HERE COMES THE BRIDE! ( HE BEGINS TO SING HERE COMES THE BRIDE IN GIBBERISH- DUM-DUM-D-DUM, DUM,DUM,D,DUM . SHE ENTERS WITH VEIL AND BOUQUET)

VOLUNTEER

MY FELLOW INSECTS! WE ARE GATHERED HERE TODAY FOR THE WEDDING OF TWO RIBBLES. YOU MAY NOW SAY THE INSECT MARRIAGE VOWS.

IMA

I IMA RIBBLE DO TAKE YOU URA A RIBBLE TO BE MY INSECT WIFE.

URA

I URA RIBBLE DO TAKE YOU IMA RIBBLE TO BE MY INSECT HUSBAND.

VOLUNTEER

I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU HUSBAND AND WIFE. YOU MAY NOW CLICK THE BRIDE.

(THEY DO A FUNNY INSECT DANCE AND JIGGLE THERE ANTENNA WHILE CLICKING HAND HELD CRICKET SOUND MAKERS) EVERYONE MAY I PRESENT MR. AND MRS. RIBBLE! (THEY TURN TO THE AUDIENCE AND WALK UP THE CENTER AISLE GREEETING GUESTS)

URA

OH LOOK IT’S MOM AND DAD.

IMA

I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW SIR THAT I WILL BE A GOOD HUSBAND TO YOUR DAUGHTER.

URA

YOU BETTER BE OR I’LL SICK MY BROTHERS ON YOU.

IMA

I DIDN’T KNOW YOU HAD BROTHERS.

URA

I DO. WOULD YOU LIKE TO MEET THEM? HERE’S FRANK, LLOYD AND WRIGHT, THEY RUN AN ARCHITECTURE FIRM, THERE’S MICHAEL AND ANGELO AND I,M AND PEI. AND…

IMA

HOW MANY BROTHERS DO YOU HAVE?

URA

27…I THINK.

IMA

WOW. OH HERE’S SOMEONE FROM MY SIDE OF THE FAMILY I WANT YOU TO MEET. (CHOOSING ANOTHER AUDIENCE MEMBER) IT’S MY UNCLE BARNEY FROM TUSCALOOSA.

URA

PLEASED TO MEET YOU,UNCLE BARNEY, IMA HAS TOLD ME ALL ABOUT YOU. HE LOOKS A LOT LIKE YOU IMA.

IMA

DO YOU THINK SO I ALWAYS THOUGHT I FAVORED MY AUNT BERTHA. WELL UNCLE BARNEY, MOM & DAD,BROTHERS AND SISTERS AND ALL THE REST OF YOU RIBBLETS, URA AND I ARE OFF TO OUR HONEYMOON.

URA

WHERE ARE YOU TAKING ME DEAR…HUSBAND?

IMA

WELL DEAR… WIFE. WE ARE GOING TO THE PLACE WE FIRST MET.

URA

THE PLAYGROUND AT THE SCHOOL?

IMA

YEP.

URA

OH HOW ROMANTIC! LET’S GO MR. RIBBLE. (SHE PRESENTS HER ARM)

IMA

RIGHT THIS WAY MRS. RIBBLE. ( THEY LOCK ARMS AND HOP OFF HUMMING THE WEDDING MARCH)

SCENE 2:

( THEY ENTER WITH BEACH TOWELS AND A BEACH BAG)

IMA

THIS LOOKS LIKE A GOOD SPOT. ( HE PUTS HIS TOWEL DOWN)

URA

Hmmmm? I LIKE IT OVER HERE. ( SHE HOPS TO ANOTHER SPOT AND WAITS FOR HIM TO PUT HER TOWEL DOWN THERE.)

IMA

WELL… I LIKE IT OVER HERE.

URA

WELL THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD STAY THERE.

IMA

OH ALL RIGHT I’LL COME OVER THERE.

URA

NO WAIT. LET’S MEET IN THE MIDDLE!

IMA

GREAT IDEA! (THEY MOVE THEIR TOWELS TO CENTER NEXT TO EACH OTHER) THIS IS MUCH BETTER. WE’LL HAVE TO LEARN TO COOPERATE IF WE ARE GOING TO BUILD A FUTURE TOGETHER.

URA

YES DEAR. WOULD YOU LIKE TO OPEN OUR WEDDING PRESENTS?

IMA

I SURE WOULD. (HE TAKE’S OUT A PRESENT FROM THE BAG AND OPENS IT)

IT’S A……. FRYING PAN?

URA

THAT WILL BE VERY USEFUL ONCE WE HAVE A KITCHEN. ( SHE OPENS ONE)

IT’S A ….. HAMMER?

IMA

THAT WILL BE VERY USEFUL TOO ONCE WE HAVE SOMETHING TO BUILD.

URA

OH HERE’S A WEDDING CARD ADDRESSED TO YOU. (SHE HANDS HIM A CARD)

IMA

(OPENS THE CARD AND READS) “DEAR IMA IT’S YOUR UNCLE BARNEY. I’M SO HAPPY YOU GOT MARRIED TODAY. CONGRATULATIONS. YOUR AUNT BETSEY AND I NEVER THOUGHT ANYONE WOULD WANT TO MARRY YOU SO BOYARE YOU LUCKY.”HUH VERY FUNNY UNCLE BARNEY. “ANYWAY I HAVE A VERY SPECIAL PRESENT FOR YOU AND URA. IT’S A DEED TO A PIECE OF LAND THAT YOUR GRANDFATHER GAVE ME A LONG TIME AGO. YOU CAN BUILD A HOME THERE FOR YOU AND YOUR NEW WIFE AND ANY BABY RIBBLETS THAT MIGHT COME ALONG. HINT,HINT,WINK,WINK. GO BUILD A HOUSE FOR YOUR FAMILY IMA. BUILD A HOME FOR A BETTER WORLD. ALL THE BEST BARNEY AND BETSEY RIBBLE.”

(HE FISHES OUT THE DEED FROM THE ENVELOPE) LOOK HERE’S THE DEED!

(THEY HOP AROUND FOR JOY AND MAKE WEIRD INSECT SOUNDS)

URA

OH WHAT A GIFT! I’M SO HAPPY I COULD CLICK YOU! (THEY CLICK) WHERE IS IT?

IDA

LET’S SEE. (HE INSPECTS THE DEED) 62 1/2 STRAWBERRY LANE BEHIND OLD McDONALD’S BARN NEXT TO THE GARDEN PATCH BETWEEN THE HAYSTACK AND THE CLUMP OF GRASS.

URA

OH I CAN’T WAIT TO SEE IT LET’S HOP OVER THERE NOW.

IDA

WE MUST. OH HAPPY DAY! (THEY GATHER UP THE STUFF AND HAPPY DANCE OFF BOTH SINGING)

IDA& URA

WE’RE GOING TO BUILD A HOUSE, WE’RE GOING TO BUILD A HOUSE, OH WE’RE GOING TO BUILD A HOUSE!!! (THEY EXIT)

SCENE 3:

( THEY REENTER WITH HAMMER AND FRYING PAN AND DEED)

IDA

I THINK THIS IS IT. YES,YES,YES THERE’S THE BARN. THERE’S THE GARDEN ( HE POINTS LEFT) THERE’S THE HAYSTACK ( POINTS RIGHT) AND THERE’S THE CLUMP OF GRASS! THIS IS IT. THIS IT. THIS IS IT!

URA

THIS IS IT?

IMA

YOU DON’T LIKE IT?

URA

I DIDN’T SAY THAT. IT DOES NEED A LITTLE WORK. THERE’S NOTHING HERE.

IMA

I’VE GOTTA HAMMER URA I AM GOING TO BUILD YOU THE BIGGEST BESTEST HOUSE YOU HAVE EVER SEEN. IT’S GOING TO BE HUUUUGE. 27 BEDROOMS FOR ALL YOUR BROTHERS, A SWIMMING POOL, A FOUR GRASSHOPPER GARAGE.

URA

WAIT,WAIT,WAIT,WAIT,WAIT! I DON’T NEED A HUUUUUGE HOUSE IMA I WANT SOMETHING THAT’S MORE MODEST. SOMETHING THAT’S NOT SO BIG IT WILL USE UP ALL MY ENERGY JUST TO CLEAN IT. NOT TO MENTION ALL THE ENERGY IT WILL USE TO KEEP IT WARM, AND THE WATER IT WOULD USE AND THE PLUMBING AND THE HEATING AND THE CLEANING AND THE COOKING AND THE

WASHING AND THE LAUNDRY AND THE…..( SHE WEEPS AND WAILS)

IMA

OH HONEY, SWEETY, DARLING, LOVE OF MY LIFE, THE CUTEST LITTLE BUG I’VE EVER SEEN, MY LITTLE SQUEEGY POO! IT’S GOING TO BE OKAY. WE’LL BUILD A HOUSE THAT’S JUST THE RIGHT SIZE FOR US. NOT TOO BIG NOT TOO SMALL, JUST SO.

URA

JUST SO.

IMA

JUST SO.

URA

IMA HAVE YOU EVER BUILT ANYTHING?

IMA

UMMM… I BUILT A SPICE RACK ONCE IN THIRD GRADE.

URA

A SPICE RACK? THAT’S NICE IMA.VERY NICE. BUT WE CAN’T LIVE IN A SPICE RACK!!!!!

IMA

YOU HAVE NO CONFIDENCE IN MY CREATIVE ABILITIES! ( STARTS STOMPING ABOUT) I’LL SHOW YOU. NOW YOU JUST WATCH. I’LL BUILD YOU A HOUSE IN 5 MINUTES. THERE’S NOTHING TO IT. I’LL SHOW YOU. I’M JUST GOING TO GO GET ME A PIECE OF WOOD AND SOME NAILS AND A SCREWDRIVER AND A LADDER AND RULER AND A CROWBAR AND SOME SHINGLES AND SOME…. WAAHH! ( HE BEGINS TO CRY)

URA

OH, HONEY, SWEETY, MY LITTLE POOPSY DOODLE! DON’T CRY. I HAVE AN IDEA I’LL ASK MY SISTER-IN-LAW THIA THE ARCHITECT TO FLY OVER AND SEE US.SHE WORKS FOR MY BROTHERS, FRANK, LLOYD AND WRIGHT, THE ARCHITECTS. SHE’S BEEN ALL AROUND THE WORLD AND SEEN EVERYKIND OF BUILDING THERE IS. I’M SURE SHE CAN HELP US MAKE A PLAN. NOW I HAVE A DOCTOR’S APPOINTMENT SO I’LL SEND OVER TOMORROW SO YOU CAN TALK TO HER.

IMA

A DOCTOR’S APPOINTMENT? WHAT’S WRONG URA ARE YOU SICK?

URA

OH IT’S NOTHING. MY TUMMY IS FEELING FUNNY.I’M SURE IT’S SOMETHING I ATE.

IMA

PROBABLY THAT SPINACH SALAD PIZZA.

URA

MAYBE SO. WHY DON’T YOU EXPLORE THE PROPERTY A BIT AND I’LL SEE IF I CAN FIND SOMETHING SOFT LIKE A DANDELION PUFF TO SLEEP ON TONIGHT. ( SHE EXITS)

IMA

OH UNCLE BARNEY, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU. WHAT A WONDERFUL THING TO HAVE A PIECE OF LAND. (WALKING ABOUT THE ROOM) THIS IS INSPIRING. RIGHT NOW I FEEL LIKE A KING! THIS IS MY KINGDOM. FROM THE HAYSTACK TO THE CLUMP OF GRASS! I WILL BUILD A CASTLE OR MAYBE SOMETHING A LITTLE SMALLER HERE. OVER HERE I WILL HAVE A MOAT WITH A DRAWBRIDGE THAT LEADS INTO 20’ DOORS! WHEN YOU ENTER IT WILL HAVE A LONG RED CARPET FOR OH…100’ ( HE BEGINS TO STEP OFF A FEW FEET) 1,2,3

( HE LOOKS UP AND SEES THAT’S TOO LONG) UMMM OKAY 50’. IT WILL HAVE EVERYTHING I EVER DREAMED OF. A SWIMMING POOL, AN ENORMOUS ROOM FILLED WITH VIDEO GAMES, A BASKETBALL COURT, A BOWLING ALLEY AND I’LL NEED ENTIRE ROOM FOR MY ELVIS THE RIBBLE COLLECTION. YOU KNOW THIS IS SOUNDING LIKE A PRETTY BIG HOUSE. I GUESS I BETTER GET STARTED. ( TAKES UP HIS HAMMER) NOW LET’S SEE…UMM…AHHH…OK… I THINK I’LL JUST DIG A HOLE FOR MY HOUSE. YES I’M JUST GOING TO DIG A HOLE RIGHT HERE AND BUILD ME A HOUSE. ( HE HESITATES BEFORE USING HIS HAMMER TO DIG) NOW WAIT A MINUTE. MAYBE I DON’T WANT THE HOLE OVER HERE SO CLOSE TO THE HAYSTACK. ( CROSSES TO THE OTHER SIDE AND REPEATS THE ACTION WITH THE HAMMER) EHHH THIS IS NO GOOD IT’S TOO CLOSE TO THE CLUMP OF GRASS.( WALKS SOMEWHERE ELSE) HERE, NO. ( WALKS) HERE NO! OH I DON’T KNOW WHERE TO START! THERE ARE SO MANY THINGS TO DECIDE. IT’S GIVING ME A HEADACHE. I NEED A NAP. MAYBE TOMORROW WHEN OUR FRIEND THIA COMES BY SHE CAN HELP ME FIGURE THIS OUT.

URA

( FROM OFF-STAGE) IMA COME TO BED. I FOUND A NICE PETUNIA FOR US TO SLEEP ON.

IMA

JUST IN TIME I’M BUSHED. ( HE EXITS)

SCENE IV

( WE HEAR A TWEET FROM THIA OFF-STAGE THEN SHE FLIES ONSTAGE AND GOES INTO THE HOUSE AND BACK TO THE STAGE SHE HAS A SATCHEL WITH HER)

THIA

AH , TWEET, TWEET!, THIS MUST BE ZE PLACE. ZARE IS ZE HAYSTACK, ZE CLUMP OF GRASS’, ZE BARN AND ZE GARDEN PATCH. OUI,OUI ZIS IS ZIT! UH HUH. VERY NICE! I CAN SEE MANY POSSIBILITIES HERE AND SOME PROBLEMS TO SOLVE TOO.

MAGNIFIQUE! I LOVE A CHALLENGE. LET’S GET STARTED WE HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO DO. BUT WHERE IS MONSIER RIBBLE? MONSIER RIBBLE. TWEET, TWEET? ARE YOU ZARE? ( CROWS) COCK-A-DOODLE –DO!!!

IMA

OH GOOD MORNING. WHAT TIME IS IT?

THIA

5:00 A.M. I THINK.THE SUN HAS BEEN UP FOR 15 MINUTES.

IMA

5:00 A.M.?

THIA

I’M A BIRD IMA. WE GET UP EARLY. YOU KNOW WE HAVE ZE WORMS TO CATCH.

I’M THIA VON BIRD. TWEET TO MEET YOU IMA. WE ARE FAMILY NOW. I’M MARRIED TO URA’S BROTHER.

IMA

WHICH ONE? FRANK?

THIA

NO.

IMA

LLOYD?

THIA

NO.

IMA & THIA

WRIGHT!

IMA

URA TOLD ME YOU WERE COMING BY THIA, THANK YOU FOR COMING. SO THIS IS IT OUR NEW HOME. EXCEPT THERE’S NOT REALLY A HOME HERE YET. NOT EVEN A DOOR TO A HOME. I DON’T EVEN HAVE A PLACE TO PUT MY ELVIS THE RIBBLE COLLECTION.

THIA

TWEET,TWEET MONSIOUR RIBBLE IT IS NOTHING YET BUT EVERYTHING YOU SEE WAS ONCE A PIECE OF LAND LIKE YOURS A PATCH OF DIRT WITH NOTHING ON IT. ZIS BARN, ZE HOUSES,ZE SCHOOL,ZE CHURCH, ZE BANK,ZE EIFFEL TOWER, ZE PYRAMIDS, ZE GREAT WALL OF CHINA ALL WERE NOTHING ONCE.

IMA

I’LL BE HONEST WITH YOU THIA NOW THAT I HAVE SLEPT ON IT I HAVE A PRETTY GOOD IDEA THAT I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO BUILD A HOUSE. THERE ARE JUST SO MANY DESCISIONS TO BE MADE.

THIA

AH OUI! BUT THIS IS WHERE I THIA ZE ARCHITECT COMES IN. THE BLANK SPACE YOU SEE KNOW WILL SOMEDAY BE THE PLACE YOU WILL CALL HOME. WHAT WE NEED IS A PLAN. ( SHE GETS OUT A SAMPLE BLUEPRINT) THIS IS A SAMPLE OF ONE OF MANY DRAWINGS AN ARCHITECT MUST DO WHEN DESIGNING A HOUSE. I DESIGNED IT FOR A COUPLE OF LADY BUGS I KNOW. IT’S CALLED A FLOOR PLAN AND YOU CAN SEE IT SHOWS THE DIFFERENT ROOMS OF THE HOUSE AS IF YOU WERE ABOVE IT. LIKE A BIRD, TWEET,TWEET FLYING OVER YOUR HOUSE AND LOOKING DOWN ON IT,TWEET. ( SHE FLYS ABOUT)

IMA

OH YES I SEE HERE IS THE KITCHEN, THIS MUST BE THE LIVING ROOM AND THIS THE FRONT DOOR I THINK AND HERE IS A BATHROOM TOO.

THIA

THAT’S RIGHT IT’S ONE OF SEVERAL DRAWINGS I MUST DO. LIKE A SITE PLAN. THAT’S A DRAWING OF THE LAND ITSELF THAT WILL TELL US JUST HOW MUCH LAND IS YOUR PROPERTY AND WHERE WE WILL PUT THE HOUSE.

IMA

THAT’S GOOD. CAUSE LAST NIGHT I HAD A HECK OF A TIME WITH THAT.

THIA

I’LL ALSO DO AN ELEVATION PLAN THAT WILL SHOW HOW IT LOOKS TO US WHEN WE STAND INFRONT OF IT.

IMA

LIKE A PICTURE OF MY HOUSE.

THIA

MORE LIKE A DRAWING OF YOUR HOUSE BUT IN GREAT DETAIL. EVERYTHING I DO MUST BE DRAWN FIRST. THE DOORS THE WINDOWS,THE WALLS, THE STAIRS,EVERYTHINGAND MEASURED VERY CAREFULLY. I USE SPECIAL TOOLS FOR DRAWING LINES,CIRCLES AND CURVES LIKE A T-SQUARE AND A COMPASS AND TO MEASURE I USE A SPECIAL RULER LIKE THIS. (SHE SHOWS THE RULER) YOU SEE IT HAS 3 SIDES AND IS TRIANGULAR IN SHAPE. EACH SIDE HAS 2 SCALES ON IT SO THERE ARE SIX DIFFERENT WAYS TO MEASURE WITH IT.

IMA

WHAT DOES A SCALE MEAN?

THIA

WELL IF I WANTED TO DRAW YOUR HOUSE ON A PIECE OF PAPER IN IT’S ACTUAL SIZE I WOULD NEED A VERY, VERY LARGE PIECE OF PAPER TO DO IT.

IMA

OR A VERY.VERY SMALL HOUSE.

THIA

TWEET,TWEET! SO INSTEAD I USE A SMALL MEASUREMENT TO REPRESENT A LARGE AMOUNT. LIKE 1 INCH EQUALS 1 FOOT. WHEN IT COMES TIME TO BUILD IT THE BUILDING CONTRACTOR WILL KNOW HOW TO MEASURE HIS MATERIALS.

HE WILL SIMPLY LOOK AT MY PLANS AND SAY” AH,HUH! I ZE THE SIZE OF ZE DOOR IS 7 INCHES THAT MEANS THE DOOR IS 7 FEET.

IMA

I HOPE HE KNOWS HOW TO READ I’D HATE TO HAVE A 7INCH DOOR.

THIA

OUI,OUI! THAT IS WHY I MUST BE VERY CAREFUL WITH MY MEASUREMENTS IF I’M NOT THEN THE DOOR’S WON’T CLOSE, THE WINDOWS WON’T OPEN, THE FLOORS WILL TILT, THE TOILET WILL LEAK AND ZE WHOLE THING WILL COME CRUMBLING DOWN AND YOU DON’T WANT THAT.

IMA

OH NO THIA I WANT THIS HOUSE TO LAST A VERY LONG TIME.

THIA

THEN WHAT YOU NEED IS A GOOD FOUNDATION. EVERYTHING THAT YOU BUILD ONTOP OF YOUR FOUNDATION WILL GIVE YOUR HOUSE THE STRENGTH IT NEEDS OVER TIME. LIKE THE PYRAMIDS.

IMA

AH.. I’M NOT SURE ABOUT THE PYRAMID THING I DON’T THINK URA WOULD LIKE THAT.

THIA

NO,NO,NO! YOUR HOUSE MUST FIT YOUR NEEDS AND THE NATURAL SETTING IT SITS ON SOMETHING THAT FITS YOU AND URA..JUST SO.

IMA

YES, JUST SO.

THIA

YOU KNOW I HAVE BEEN TO THE FOUR CORNERS OF ZE EARTH AND I HAVE SEEN BUILDINGS OF ALL KINDS FROM TINY CABINS FOR FRUIT FLIES, IGLOOS FOR MY PENGUIN FRIENDS, SAND CASTLES FOR THE HERMIT CRABS,BRICK HOUSES, WOOD HOUSES,GLASS HOUSES EVEN MUD HOUSES.I’VE FLOWN OVER LONDON BRIDGE, HAD LUNCH ON THE GREAT WALL OF CHINA AND MET A HANDSOME BLUE JAY ONTOP OF THE EIFFEL TOWER. OH,LA,LA. ARCHITECTURE IS EVERYWHERE! FROM THE SMALLEST HUT TO THE BIGGEST PALACE YOU’VE EVER SEEN AN ARCHITECT HAD TO HELP BUILD IT.

IMA

I BUILT A SPICE RACK ONCE. I GUESS IT WASN’T MUCH. I REMEMBER I PAINTED IT BLUE TO MATCH OUR KITCHEN.

THIA

THEN YOU UNDERSTAND COMPLETELY! TO MAKE YOUR SPICE RACK YOU HAD TO USE THE 3 RULES OF GOOD ARCHITECTURE, FIRMITAS,UTILITAS,VENUSTAS.

IMA

I’M SORRY I DON’T SPEAK FRENCH.

THIA

IT’S LATIN AND THESE 3 RULES WERE WRITTEN INTO 10 BOOK’S ABOUT ARCHITECTURE THAT WERE WRITTEN A VERY LONG TIME AGO BY A MAN NAMED VITRUVIUS.

FIRMITAS- MEANS IT MUST BE FIRM AND SOLID, BUILT WITH STURDY MATERIALS ON A STRONG FOUNDATION

UTILITAS- MEANS IT MUST BE USEFUL. EASY TO USE AND HAVE A CONVENIENT LAYOUT

VENUSTAS- IT SHOULD BE BEAUTIFUL AND PLEASING TO LOOK AT.

WHEN YOU MADE YOUR SPICE RACK IT HAD TO HAVE ALL THESE THINGS.

IT HAD TO SOLID ENOUGH TO HOLD ALL YOUR SPICES SO THEY COULD EASILY BE TAKEN OFF AND ON ZE RACK AND WHEN IT WAS FINISHED YOU PANTED IT BLUE TO MAKE IT LOOK BEAUTIFUL. VOILA, ARCHITECTURE!

IMA

VOILA TO YOU TOO! WELL SINCE I’M AN EXPERT ARCHITECT I SAY LET’S GET STARTED! I WANT TO DIG A HOLE FOR MY HOUSE BUT I’M NOT SURE WHERE TO START IT.

THIA

THIS IS GOOD. BE CAREFUL WHERE YOU START AS IT WILL BE HARD TO GO BACK.

FIRST LET’S LOOK AT THE SUN. (THEY LOOK UP,PAUSE)

IMA

AH….I’M NOT SURE WHY WE ARE LOOKING AT THE SUN RIGHT NOW.

THIA

THE SUN WILL HELP US DECIDE WHERE WE WANT OUR WINDOWS TO FACE SO WE CAN USE THE ENERGY OF THE SUN TO WARM YOUR HOME AND FOR NATURAL LIGHT. THIS IS THE DIRECTION THE SUN RISES IN THE MORNING HERE SO WE’LL ADD MORE WINDOWS ON THIS SIDE. NOW LET’S CONSIDER THE VIEW. AFTER ALL YOU’LL BE LOOKING OUT YOUR FRONT WINDOW FOR A VERY LONG TIME. ( THEY STAND AT CENTER AND FACE DR. ) THIS WAY IS NICE BUT THAT CLUMP OF GRASS BLOCKS THE SUN. (THEY TURN DC.) THE ROAD HERE IS WELL TRAVELLED AND DANGEROUS SO THIS WON’T WORK. ( FACING UL. ) THIS DIRECTION IS AWFULLY CLOSE TO THE HAYSTACK AND THE TRACTOR COMES AND GOES FROM HERE SO NOT SO GOOD. ( THEY FACE DL AND WALK TOWARDS IT)