THE DETECTIVES: Get out of Jail Free

ARCHIE THIEF

WINSLOW THIEF'S HELPER #1

LUCY THEIF'S HELPER #2

THEIF'S HELPER #3

THE DETECTIVES: GET OUT OF JAIL FREE

(Scene One: Winslow's office, WINSLOW and ARCHIE)

PROPS: None needed

ARCHIE: Inspector, there's a girl here to see you.

WINSLOW: Send her in, Archie.

LUCY: Inspector Winslow, you've got to help me. None of the other detectives will even listen to a little girl like me.

WINSLOW: But I certainly will. Children's problems are very important to God, so I'm sure Jesus wants me to do my very best for you. What's your name, miss?

LUCY: My name is Lucy.

WINSLOW: And how can we help you, Lucy?

LUCY: Well, when I was at school yesterday, some thief just grabbed my kickball and ran across the street with it.

ARCHIE: Did he leave you with any clues, like did he tell you his name?

LUCY: No. He just said, "I'll be back for another ball tomorrow."

WINSLOW: Hmmm. I think I know how to find this guy. Just meet me at the front gate of your school, tomorrow morning at 8:00, Lucy.

LUCY: Ok, inspector. And thank you for your help.

(Scene Two: At the school, ARCHIE enters, pushing a trash can that WINSLOW is hiding inside)

PROPS: Playground ball, sensor chip, location sensor device, trash can, broom, clubhouse sign

LUCY: Hi, Archie. How come you're sweeping up around here?

ARCHIE: Shhh! I'm trying to disguise myself as a janitor.

LUCY: Where's the inspector?

WINSLOW: (lifting the trash can lid) Good morning, Lucy. Do you see this little microchip?

LUCY: Yes.

WINSLOW: It's very sticky. Just stick it somewhere on the ball you're playing with.

LUCY: Okay (she does so).

WINSLOW: Good girl! Now when that thief shows up again and steals this ball from you, no matter where he goes, my location sensor will track him down and find him. I'll just hide right here until he comes (shuts the lid).

THIEF: Hey girl, it's me again. Nice ball. It's so nice of you to give it to me. Ha Ha (he runs off and goes behind the partition)!

LUCY: Inspector Winslow, he just stole another playground ball!

WINSLOW: Archie, after him!

ARCHIE: I already lost him, inspector. That guy is fast!

WINSLOW: That's quite okay, Archie. My location sensor should help us out.

(WINSLOW begins to use the sensor. He relays direction commands to ARCHIE, who follows them by pushing WINSLOW around in the trash can. Finally, ARCHIE is steered up the center aisle and right to the partition entrance in the back. By this point, the clubhouse sign should be attached to the partition.)

ARCHIE: Hey, look at that sign, inspector. It says, "Secret home of the Black Cloud Club. Keep out. This means you!" Well, let's go (he starts to push the trash can away).

WINSLOW: Hey, wait a minute, Archie. Where are you going?

ARCHIE: Well, the sign says to keep out. I'm just trying to obey the sign.

WINSLOW: Never mind the sign, Archie. This is the thief's hangout! Just knock on the door and arrest whoever's inside. I'll be hiding in this trash can in case you need my help.

ARCHIE: Knock knock.

THIEF: Who's there?

ARCHIE: Archie.

THIEF: Archie who?

ARCHIE: Archie glad I'm here alone? Ha ha!

THIEF: You're here alone? That sounds good to me. Come on out, guys (three other boys come out).

THIEF'S HELPER #1: Are you really going to try to arrest us all by yourself?

ARCHIE: Nope. I've got extra help.

THIEF'S HELPER #2: What does he mean, boss. I don't see anybody else.

WINSLOW: (popping up) Hold it right there. This is my thermo- freeze gun. When I pull the trigger, you're going to freeze (he has some trouble getting it to work). Heh-heh. I guess it needs new batteries.

THIEF: All right, get out of the trash can (WINSLOW does).

THIEF'S HELPER #1: What are we going to do with them, boss?

THIEF: We can't let them go, or they'll tell the police on us. I know! We'll lock them up in the old prison.

THIEF'S HELPER #2: You mean that jail that hasn't been used in over a hundred years?

THIEF: That's the one. Nobody will ever find them in that place. Let's go, you two (gives ARCHIE a push down one of the side aisles)

(Scene Three: At the prison, THEIF, WINSLOW, ARCHIE)

PROPS: Cardboard jail background, padlock & key

THIEF: (pushing them both inside the jail) Move it, move it. Get in there.

WINSLOW: You'll never get away with this.

THIEF: You mean you'll never get away. I will now lock the door and throw away the key (he does it). Ha ha! Do you have anything to say before we leave?

WINSLOW: I only have one thing to say: See you later, alligator.Come on, Archie. Let's get out of here.

THIEF: What do you mean? You're not going anywhere.

WINSLOW: You were in such a hurry to lock us up that you made one big mistake. You locked us up on the wrong side of the bars. In other words, we are free. You are the ones locked in jail.

THIEF'S HELPER #2: You big dummy! You locked us in jail and threw away the key!

WINSLOW: Don't worry. I won't just leave you here all alone.

THIEF: You won't?

WINSLOW: Of course not. I'll be back with some policemen to keep you company.

THE END