Have You Paid Your Subs Yet?

HAVE YOU PAID YOUR SUBS YET?

FOREWORD

Welcome to the second edition of the weekly match reports of Brighton & Hove Crescent.

As skipper , I write most of the entries, though able deputies stand in when I do not play. The main reason why we started doing this was to ease the embarrassment of requesting somebody's Sunday on a Saturday evening , As anybody who has had anything to do with the running of a small cricket club will know, this is not exactly an unusual occurrence. By keeping everybody informed of what is going on with a weekly report, it makes "that' phonecall marginally less awkward. At least the prospective recruit can usually put a face to the caller, if not two blurred ones, when the call comes particularly late in the evening.

The subject of this year's cover illustration is undoubtedly the main reason why this club has survived since 1903. Eric Pratt has been treasurer and treasured umpire for very many years. Both posts inherently require enormous degrees of tact and layers of thick skin. Eric performs both tasks with great distinction, and the club is indebted to him , if I may use the phrase. Of course there is the odd occasion when a member may forget this, usually associated with an upward movement of a finger accompanied by a broad grin. As an umpire he is respected throughout the county . As a treasurer it is hard to envisage how the club would have survived so long without him.

Having a proper umpire usually greatly enhances our chances of winning any game. Don't get me wrong as Eric is totally impartial and far from finger happy. It's just that club cricketers umpiring tend to be very keen to be involved ,and the benefit of the doubt more often goes to the bowler than the batsman. Our own players over the years have given their own batsmen out at an alarming rate. Trouble is that this trend rarely seems to be reciprocated by the opposition. A big plus of having somebody umpiring who is also the club treasurer is that annual subscriptions tend to be paid early by both batsman and bowlers alike. Not that it does them any good. Over all our years together I can think of only one opponent who may have an unfair advantage against us due to excessive umpire hospitality. A senior batsman from a Gloucestershire village side who has annually plied Eric with a bottomless supply of whiskey and dry ginger. We annually give his average a good boost, and he uses his pads with the air of a man who knows no fear. I'm sure however, it's all in my imagination, and his time will come eventually.

Another season has passed, a great deal wetter than many, but still enough warm memories to keep us going through the dark months. One game that only lasted twenty minutes perhaps epitomises what is both best and worst about the cricket we play. An emergency fixture over at Worthing on a Sunday as wet as any I can remember. It had been raining since midday Saturday and hadn't let up when twenty-two optimists arrived at the ground with every intention of playing. It only took twenty minutes to realise how ridiculous our combined behaviour was, and we all went home again, with heavy hearts and heavy bags of sodden white clothing. I can still hardly believe that everybody turned up, but there you have in a nutshell the joy of club cricket. Long may it continue.

Richard Ford

October 1992. Brighton.

HAVE YOU PAID YOUR SUBS YET? RICHARD FORD

Also by the same author "Who's Got The Bloody Scorebook?"

The 1991 diary of a somewhat anonymous and unassuming "village cricket club called Brighton & Hove Crescent. As such, only the players and supporters familiar with the club's characters and private jokes will fully appreciate the wit and humour with which the pamphlet has been written. It is a refreshing idea however, which more clubs ought to emulate - it makes a wonderful souvenir of a summer's endeavour. JAMES NICHOLSON "THE CRICKETER" March 1992

This is a diary of the club's 1991 season (the 88th of its history). It consists of a compilation of the captain's match reports which were sent out on a weekly basis, essentially to members who missed games. The reports are detailed and amusing, but obviously of more interest to the participants than a more general readership. The work ends with players' career statistics covering the period from 1973 (excepting 1974, scorebook lost, hence the title!). A very honest account of the thriving world of cricket at the grass roots level, with competition and comradeship combining to explain why so many love the game.

BARRIE WATKINS "THE JOURNAL OF THE CRICKET SOCIETY" Autumn 1992 Volume 16 Number 1

All match reports by Richard Ford unless otherwise stated.

PREPARATION, PRACTICE AND PITFALLS

Goring away 26.4.92

They do not bowl me off my pad, No catches from my glove are had:

The hated "leg-before" is banned

In matches played in Fairyland,

From EBV Christian's "Dream That I Dream in At the Sign of The Wicket (1894).

After some weeks of hard net practice, the Saturday on the eve of the season brought a clear sunny day. Sunday the first day of the Crescent season brought monsoon leaving us washed out for the first time since 1986. Nick Hollands in the role of team secretary has been delighted by the response to team availability lists which is making his job so much easier. June's advance list will follow by the middle of May, please return it to Nick as soon as possible especially if you are a "floating' member. From my limited experience I can only remember one year when the first two games of the season were washed out and that was 1982 so fingers crossed for our trip to Fittleworth. Please also note our home fixture with Aston Ingham 30,6.92 a Tuesday - we owe them some of our own hospitality. I would appreciate a reply from those of you wishing to tour, please come if only for a day or two.

On a sad note we much regret the death in the past few weeks of our very old friend Sam Dumbrell and send our sincere condolences to his widow Emmie. On a happier note congratulations to Simon & Sharon Brown on the birth of a son -Edward.

If you wish to receive a copy of Richard's match reports please write and let him know. Last seasons compilation as reviewed in "The Cricketer" has sold over 60 copies now. Look forward to seeing you all in the season.

WATCHING THE. RAIN AND RINGING ME; Ford, Wood S., Gatford,

Wheatly-Crowe, East, Hollands, Gowers, Howells, Edmondson, Gray, Ayling.

SHREWD METEOROLOGISTS; Gillingham, Ashdown, Whistence-Smith, Wood

N., Cook, Sice, Swann, Rice, Brown, White, Carter, Hudson, Grant.

ABROAD SOON TO RETURN; Tossell.

Report by : SIMON WOOD.

CRESCENT AT FITTLEWORTH

3.5.92

After the disappointment of last week it was a joy indeed to sup an ale at the Swan at Fittleworth, sitting in the sun and grateful that the new season was underway. Nick Hollands is selecting from an unusually large squad at the moment, and the lucky ones all found the ground in time for a prompt start, eager to be seen to be keen. The changing room at Fittleworth is rather small, and didn't do justice to the array of startling clean white clean kit and new cricketing accessories that always come with the first game of the year. I won the toss and made the first wrong decision of the season, electing to bat. That well-oiled machine that is Crescent top-order moved smoothly into gear and we cruised to 175-2 by tea. John Gillingham (21) and Rick Carter (69) put on 72 for the first wicket, and Chris Gray (53*) and Mark Edmondson (23*) continued the good work. While there was little in the wicket for any kind of bowler, batting was never easy as it was so slow and low. light-years from indoor nets.

After a wonderfully eccentric tea of sausage and chips, with salads, sandwiches, cakes and various beverages we enthusiastically set about the batsman of Fittleworth. In a side packed with flighted filth the skipper couldn't even get on, and despite testing spells from Gatford, Wood, Gowers, Rice and Gray, the opposition batted sensibly enough to save the game. Despite soft cold hands the fielding was encouragingly sharp and tidy, Nick Hollands managing to keep the new wicket-keeper's equipment reasonably clean as well as doing the job efficiently. Eric umpired throughout in his normal good humoured way, keeping hands firmly in the warmth of his pockets. It was an extra-strong mint day rather than a boiled sweet day. Despite excessive encouragement Fittleworth managed only 107-7.

Please keep your availability's flooding in to Nick and Judy Hollands and bear with them as they try to juggle 20 balls at once. Hoping to see you soon.

RUNNERS ; Gillingham, Carter, Gray, Edmondson, Sice, Hollands, Ford, Wood S., Gowers, Gatford, Rice.

WITHDRAWN NOT UNDER ORDERS; Ashdown, Howells, Ayling, Cook, Hudson,

Brown, East, Grant, W-Crowe, W-Smith, Wood N., Swarm, Tossell.

HOT RICE LEAVES CHEFS COLD IN HORSDEAN THRILLER Worthing Chippendale at Horsdean 10,5,92

A freezing cold day, which started badly when we had to clear the pavilion of broken glass for our home debut, ended by providing two sides with one of the most exciting finishes of all time. The morning rain had been strong enough, to encourage B.T. shareholders to enjoy their lunch, but Horsdean was not too wet and the large bag of sawdust appearing from Simon's boot bode well for a prompt start. The opposition were inserted to save us from having to field in Arctic half-light five hours later. Bowling was the best way of maintaining circulation, and John Gatford and Peter W-Crowe bowled well enough to keep the ball for over an hour, taking two wickets each. Kevin Rice took over from the Vale Avenue end and increased our stranglehold with nagging flight and accuracy. Distant memories of low-scoring games on similar cold and wet Horsdean afternoons persuaded the skipper not to enter the attack, and "Chipps" were finally cooked by 4.45pm for only 78. Due to unknown reasons well beyond our control, tea was taken without tea as it were, there being no electricity. A splendid tea was enjoyed however, provided under very testing conditions,

The Crescent reply did not start well. Rick cracked Ms first half-volley straight into the chest of mid-off, who clung to it for warmth despite being knocked off his feet. The top order collapsed alarmingly to good tight bowling, though Nick Hollands was very unlucky to watch a ball trickle agonisingly slowly on to his off stump and dislodge a bail. A captains innings was called for but went unanswered, and at 21-6 morale was at a low ebb. There then followed a gritty stand from "Stonewall" Wood and a man in form - Chris Gray. They took us slowly but surely towards victory and at 74-6 Chipps conceded defeat and introduced Keith "Beefy Abdul" Horton to the attack to end the game quickly. He of course, like any good leg-spinner, saw things differently and immediately took the wickets of Chris and Peter. 75-8 and tottering. A fast shooter in fading light did for John Gatford in the next over and enter Kevin Rice (5-24).

Simon at the non-strikers end was showing signs of nervous agitation, as Crescent once again threatened to grab defeat from the jaws of victory. But cometh the hour, cometh the hero, and Kevin deftly drove his first delivery through a small hole between wicket-keeper and first slip for four winning runs, A thoroughly apt end to an exciting afternoons cricket. In the hope of playing cricket in the sun, I'm off to Majorca for a week with cap and box, leaving the side in the capable hands of PWC.

NEEDING MORE SWEATERS; dowers, Carter, Sice, East, Hollands, Ford, Wood, Gray, W-Crowe, Gatford, Rice,

IN THE WARM; Gillingham, Edmondson, Ashdowrt, Howells, Ayling, Cook, Hudson, Brown, Grant, W-Smith, Wood N., Swann, Tossell

CRESCENT V SOUTH NUTFIELD (NEAR REDHILL.)

17.5.92

Before starting the match report I must offer two sets of thanks. First, one to Goring & to Simon Wood, to Goring, for cancelling the scheduled match and to our honourable fixture secretary for arranging what turned out to be an excellent alternative fixture. The second vote of thanks goes to whatever deity that controls the weather, for producing a day that was designed for nothing but cricket, However, to the game. With Richard "divestiendo se en Espana", I filled the gap. I knew it was going to be a good day when our team compliment was complete by 2.20pm. South Nutfield's ground reminded one of Mayfield's, the only differences being: too early for the swallows, and the ambient rural noise being disturbed by the occasional train, biplane and distant throb of the M23/M25 junction.

As always, in a new fixture, the captain spends his thinking time in somewhat of a quandary - even more so when we won the toss. After consulting the senior professional - you know, the one who is always willing to offer comment insight and the useful barb - we batted, The Crescent innings closed at 4.56pm at 161 all out. This was mainly due to excellent contributions from Ric Carter (56), Nick Hollands (46*) and extras 24. The wicket played well, if somewhat low. Unfortunately, none of the other batsman managed to stay very long. Two points of interest; Steve Swann's debut showed great promise in all aspects for the future; and the acting skip recorded his second "golden" in consecutive games!

After a pleasant, but not stunning tea (polystyrene cups and plates) we took to the field. We soon knew we had a game on our hands, with their early order living dangerously, going for their shots. Eddie W-S bowled particularly well (3-26), However, the very short, straight boundaries at both ends ensured their score hurried along. All the Crescent bowlers bowled well, but as it turned out we were 20 runs short of our ideal total. In a do or die attempt to win the match Jon Gowers was invited to bowl his flighted bait. An interesting strategy, that I'm sure will come off some day. As it was, Sunday was not to be one of those days. South Nutfield hit the winning runs with three overs to spare for the loss of 8 wickets. A very pleasant evening followed in their small but very cosy clubhouse. Hopefully we behaved ourselves and impressed enough to be invited back next year. Alternative highlights of the day were : -

1)John Gillingham retracting his dubious comments about their senior umpire after he turned down a number of strenuous LBW shouts against us.

2)Ric Carter casually enquiring after the game if there was any room in their Saturday squads! (He liked the wicket)

Undoubtedly the B&H Crescent C.C, "Mcvities Dark Chocolate Digestive Biscuit" Man of the Match award went to Nick Hollands 46* and 3 catches behind the stumps - one a screamer, one handed in front of first slip. Anyway here's to this glorious weather continuing see you all soon.

P.S. Advice on how to cure a batting confidence crisis should NOT be sent to me! SURREY BASED; Gowers, Carter, Sice, Gillingham, Hollands, East, Ashdown, Swann, Gatford, Whistence-Smith, Wheatly-Crowe. STAYING IN SUSSEX; Hudson, Gray, Cook, Ayhng, Pratt. OUTSIDE SUSSEX; Wood S., Wood N., Ford, Rice, Flowelk, Edmondson.

Report by Peter Wheatly-Crowe.

COULD DO BETTER. THE CRESCENT AT FINDON

24.5.92

No finer way to guarantee good cricket weather than to hear that the skipper is off to Majorca. The surprising thing was to find it is still here on our return, and Sunday was another example of fine cricket weather - unless of course the opposition start finding you in the field. Whatever the tactical implications, the weather was hot enough to make winning the toss and fielding a reckless decision, so we batted first. Apart, from a watchful 30 from Nick Wood and a diligent 24 later by John Gatford, we did so without distinction. On a day when batting was not easy, too many of us failed to summon up the necessary concentration to survive for any length of time. Peter Sice wag unfortunate to be run-out by Nick, badly misjudging the pace of his partner, and Simon and Mark joined the list of Eric victims. Have their subs been paid I wonder? With John Gatford guiding the lower order carefully, we edged to 151 all out by tea.

It may sound churlish, but Findon's opening batsman seemed to have bigger and heavier bats than we do. They certainly hit the ball extreme distances and very hard whenever invited to do so. Their opening stand, until, broken by the persevering John Gatford, was possibly the games crucial contribution. Once broken, Findon never looked comfortable and lost wickets at regular intervals to the varied attack thrown at them. The experienced arm of Eddie was too good for a youngish middle order, facing bowling of a kind they may not have seen before in their limited years. Similarly Simon caused the younger batsmen many problems, and will bowl worse for greater reward on many occasions. But at the end of the day our batting had let us down and Findon made the target we set them with 3 wickets and 3 overs to spare.