A Pastoral
Approach
Towards Persons with a
Homosexual Orientation
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Faith and Life Commission
Virginia Mennonite Conference
901 Parkwood Drive
Harrisonburg, VA 22802
Telephone: 540-434-9727
INTRODUCTION
In 1983, the Council of Faith and Life of the Virginia Mennonite Conference drafted and approved a document, “Homosexuality—A Guide for Concerned Christians.” The Faith and Life Commission of the Virginia Mennonite Conference later reaffirmed that document in 1997. The following six points of reference were made in that statement:
1. We believe that God created human beings as male and female and intended for the expression of sexual intimacies to be fully consummated only within the heterosexual marriage relationships (Genesis 1 & 2).
2. We believe that it is necessary to distinguish between “homosexual orientation” and “homosexual practice.” Persons who experience a consistent conscious awareness of attraction to the same sex have homosexual orientation to varying degrees. This attraction arises from a variety of biological, psychological, social and spiritual factors. These persons choose to yield to or restrain their attractions in homosexual practice just as heterosexual persons choose to yield to or restrain their urges toward persons of the opposite sex.
3. We believe that the practice of homosexuality is rebuked by Scripture (Romans 1, Leviticus 18:22, I Corinthians 6:9) and remains a deviant expression of sexuality.
4. We believe that through prayer, appropriate personal ministry and therapy, some persons will be able to change from homosexual to heterosexual orientation, opening the way for heterosexual marriage. In other cases a life of celibacy is to be advised as the struggle with personal identity and orientation continues.
5. We encourage persons who struggle with varying degrees of homosexual orientation to continue to exercise the power of positive faith; to consult with sensitive pastors or Christian counselors; to make every effort to find wholeness in Jesus Christ.
6. We encourage pastors and congregations to be compassionate in dealing with persons who struggle with homosexual orientation as well as to give clear warnings and to teach against homosexual practice.
To help pastors implement this stance, we present the following pastoral guidance for ministering to persons with a homosexual orientation. The following thirteen points represent an application of the principles of the above document.
Current societal attitudes toward homosexuality are frequently expressed as two extremes. In one societal view, people have emotionally and physically reacted with hateful attitudes and acts of bigotry and violence against persons with a homosexual orientation. Alternatively, another societal view has made homosexual practice an accepted and endorsed lifestyle, thus creating pressure for Christians to ignore the bondage and sin that it represents. We encourage pastors to take a Christ-like approach to the issue of homosexuality by expressing compassion, Biblical integrity, and Christian dignity, even though it may be unpopular. Our approach is based on how we understand the teachings and principles of Scripture on the issue of homosexuality.
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1. PRAY FOR A COMPASSIONATE ATTITUDE THAT REFLECTS THE HEART OF GOD.
In order to view anything in life from God’s perspective, it is of utmost importance that we commune with him deeply and frequently. As pastors, we need to pray that the things that touch God’s heart will touch our heart. The Scriptures call us to a blended position of love and holiness: "since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another" (I John 4:11) and "be holy, because I am holy" (I Peter 1:16). That divine mandate can only experientially affect us in a Christ-like way, when it is bathed in prayers for wisdom, discernment, forgiveness, power, and love.
The example and teachings of Jesus, as revealed in Scripture, model the character and will of His Father. A most notable distinctiveness of Jesus was his compassion toward all those in need. He did not discriminate in His extension of mercy and love. He indeed is to serve as our example as we meet those who struggle with a whole range of needs.
We must confess that as we mistakenly consider ourselves more righteous than others, we judge others harshly while making wide allowance for our own sins. God has judged all as sinful and deserving of punishment. (Romans 3:23; I Corinthians 6:9-11) We do well to abhor sin but not single out certain ones, such as homosexual practice, for particular wrath. Pastoral leaders need to pray earnestly for clear vision regarding sin and righteousness as well as for God's gifting of love and compassion.
Committed pastoral leaders are ready to minister to anyone who needs wholeness in Jesus Christ. As participants in the priesthood of believers, we need to intercede with God for the welfare of all persons in our pastoral care.
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2. BEFRIEND HOMOSEXUAL PERSONS WHILE JOURNEYING TOGETHER TOWARD JESUS.
If pastoral leaders are to be helpful in a redemptive way, they need to be mature and sensitive enough not to be afraid of persons who have a homosexual orientation. Prejudice and misinformation cause fear and avoidance of homosexual persons. The Holy Spirit can empower us to rise above such barriers and make ourselves available as friends.
A friend listens. In a pastoral relationship with homosexual persons we need to engage in a three-fold listening experience. We need to hear the personal stories and understand the pain homosexual persons have experienced in struggling with sexuality and with societal attitudes toward them. We need to listen to the voice of the Spirit, the guide to Christ-centered speaking and thinking. Finally, we need to pay attention to the teaching of Scripture while consistently bringing our experiences into alignment with God's Word.
Our call is to walk with others into spiritual intimacy with Christ. Jesus had an inviting approach and did not shrink from living among those most lonely. His invitation was “Come, follow me…” (Matthew 4:19 NIV). Paul said, “I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible” (1 Corinthians 9:19 NIV). Because of our kind and friendly attitudes, homosexual persons should not fear to make themselves known to us.
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3. WELCOME PERSONS WITH HOMOSEXUAL ORIENTATION INTO SMALL GROUP SETTINGS, AS WELL AS TO GATHERINGS OF THE LARGER CONGREGATION.
Christian communities should commit themselves to making their fellowship a safe place, a haven, where God's love is experienced, forgiveness is offered and trust is kept. Welcoming persons with homosexual orientation into these settings frees the Holy Spirit to minister in powerful ways at every point of need.
Pastoral leaders have the privilege of helping those who are a part of the family of God to become this welcoming community for homosexual persons. Elements of a welcoming Christian community include mutual acceptance, love, confession, forgiveness, encouragement, and discipline. Small groups, Sunday school classes as well as the entire congregation should be encouraged to put their prayers and hospitality into action. God's people come together in order to experience healing, acceptance, and encouragement for their day-by-day walk with Jesus. As they experience such grace, they can experience the blessing of providing for others what they themselves have received.
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4. ENGAGE IN CAREFUL BIBLE STUDY.
Before beginning Bible study, prepare your heart ahead of time with much prayer for yourself and the one(s) with whom you will share. Keep in mind that God has dealt lovingly and patiently with you. He loves us as persons and at the same time hates the wrong things we do. Pray that the Holy Spirit will be free to minister in an effective way.
The Bible has been given to us as a map, light, and guide to lead us in a faithful walk with God. The pastoral leader should thus use it diligently, but not as a weapon. We depend upon the Holy Spirit to provide conviction when necessary. The Holy Spirit will guide us into all truth (John 14:26; 16:13). Realizing that different interpretations of Scripture do exist, we share our insights respectfully. With those who differ we maintain friendship, while both upholding our conviction on Biblical truth and continuing further constructive conversation.
The pastoral leader must recognize the wisdom of involving the entire congregation in the study of the Scriptures, so that the community of faith becomes a discerning one. Therefore the pastor should not only encourage Bible study among the believers, but also minister by teaching and preaching the truth of Scripture to those under pastoral care.
The following selected Scriptures are presented with a commentary following each quoted passage:
ö “Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable.” (Leviticus 18:23 NIV)
ö “If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads.” (Leviticus 20:13 NIV)
While the practice of homosexuality is seldom mentioned in Scripture the few texts that mention it unanimously condemn the practice. Supporters of homosexuality often claim this passage refers only to incest, but in so doing they limit the context. The context of the entire chapter deals with the acts of child sacrifice, adultery, incest, bestiality, and homosexuality. The holiness code in Leviticus lists the act of homosexuality, along with adultery and incest, as punishable by death. The harshness of the penalty illustrates the seriousness of the transgression in the eyes of God. Motives for homosexuality are not considered in the condemnation.
ö “The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of men who suppress the truth by their wickedness…Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another. They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshipped and served created things rather than the Creator---who is forever praised. Amen. Because of this God gave them over to shameful lusts. Even their women exchanged natural relations for unnatural ones. In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men, and received in themselves the due penalty for their perversion. Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind to do what ought not to be done.” (Romans 1:18, 24-28 NIV)
Paul depicts in this passage a picture of humankind in rebellion against God. The paragraph describes the rebellious pagan who is the subject of God’s anger. The passage reminds us that the described sins bring the anger of God. Three times in this passage the writer indicates that “God gave them over…” The increasing entanglement of the depravity and degradation is symptomatic of the pagan’s continued rebellion and the increasing development of evil character. The progression is illustrated with the sin of same-sex physical practices—both male and female homosexuality is condemned. The linkage between lust and the commitment of physical acts illustrates the progressive nature of the downward spiral. The climax of the downward progression is found in the catalog of sins listed in verses 29-31.
The first chapter of Romans contains God’s evaluation of male and female homosexuality. Homosexual sin is amplified in the passage more than the sins of envy and murder. The passage helps us understand the mind of God that homosexuality is a violation of the natural relationship between a man and a woman established by the Creator.
ö “Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God” (1 Corinthians 6:9-11 NIV).
In the list of the condemned before God, Paul includes the adulterers (moichoi), male prostitutes (malakoi), and homosexuals (arsenokoitai). Yet Paul affirms that in the past some of you were such, but now, more recently, you have experienced God’s three-fold redemptive process: 1) “washed,” spiritually cleansed by God through the Word of truth; 2) “sanctified,” set apart from the former practices and now subordinated to God’s way, and 3) “justified,” because of Jesus’ death for the sinner, God’s judgment declares the sinner is clean and transformed by the grace of Christ. That is the message of hope we bring to those in homosexual bondage.
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5. RECOGNIZE THE COMPLEXITY OF A HOMOSEXUAL ORIENTATION.
A person who experiences sexual attraction toward another person of the same gender has a homosexual orientation. The extent to which this attraction is acted out reflects the degree of homosexual practice. When the same-sex attraction becomes a compelling fantasy (exemplified by such things as indulging in pornography, erotic conversations, or sexual touching and caressing), the person has moved to lustful, hurtful, and sinful practice. This practice frequently includes oral, anal, or genital intercourse.