Write a Brief Psychological Autobiography:

We often joke about how therapy begins with “so tell me about your mother”. We don’t like to believe that what happened in our childhood somehow holds us captive today. And it doesn’t. Yet there is a lot of research and clinical evidence to suggest that our early and ongoing relationships with significant people in our lives affects the current interpersonal neurobiology of our relationships. In addition, the climate in our home in terms of how our parents treated one another and our siblings, significant transitions that occurred during our formative years (e.g., divorce, big moves, job loss), our peer group, our career choices, and many other factors affect this development.

When we feel sufficiently bonded to one another in our intimate relationships and are effective enough at managing interpersonal behavior between each other without allowing what goes on within each other to create conflict, we start to uncover some currents that stir the waters underneath our psychological surfaces

To begin to understand how our underlying current affects our contemporary relationships, write a brief autobiography with emphasis on the psychology of your life:

  • Discuss your individual temperament, worldview, personality.
  • Describe your parents each individually. Include step-parents or other major caretakers.
  • Describe how your parents each treated you, and what you came to believe about yourself based on that.
  • Describe the nature of the relationship between your parents.
  • Talk about the relationship you have with siblings and any notable experiences with them.
  • List and describe any significant emotional experiences that shaped you. This might include major transitions such as divorce of your parents, major moves, financial or health hardships, etc. It might include positive or negative experiences or contexts that shaped you such as sports or music.
  • Talk about your occupational choices and motivations.
  • List any major health, social, or mental difficulties you have had in your life and how they affect you.
  • What are your most prominent positive attributes?
  • What are your biggest struggles and weaknesses?
  • What do you want most?
  • What do you fear most?

Take as little or as long as you want on this. Try to at least provide 1-3 sentences for each of the bullets above.

© 2017 Paul Birch