Talkers, non-talkers, and disrupters
Tips for facilitators and trainers
Creating space for everyone to talk. Try some combination of these techniques:
1. Ask for ground rules at the beginning of the session; feel free to suggest a few. One of my favorites is “step up, step back.” Which means: If you’re inclined to be quiet, please speak up. If you’re inclined to talk, make an effort to listen first.
2. Break into small groups. Many people who are uncomfortable talking within the larger group will happily participate in pairs or small groups of five or fewer people.
3. Use go-arounds. “As we discuss this topic, let’s go around the circle and everyone can speak in turn. If you have nothing to say at this point, it’s OK to pass.” Some facilitators ask people to pass an object, like a “talking stick,” with the instruction that you must hold the object in order to speak. This emphasizes the need to wait one’s turn and to listen carefully.
4. Actively create space for the non-talkers. Say to the group, “For the next few minutes, let’s all listen to the people who haven’t spoken yet.”
5. Depending on the topic, it might help to hand out paper, give people time to organize their ideas and write them down before encouraging everyone to speak.
6. If appropriate, add listening exercises to your agenda. A sample is included in this packet.
Managing disrupters. A few techniques, in no particular order:
· Per item 1 above, set ground rules or guideline at the start of the session.
· Be empathetic. Sometimes people just want to be heard and respected, and that solves the problem.
· Invite the disrupter to speak privately with you or your co-facilitator, if you have one. If you’re working alone, give the group a task and pull the person aside for a chat.
· Name what’s happening: “Joe, it feels to me like your goals for this event don’t really match the agenda. What do you need? How can we meet your needs and still honor the agenda?”
· Ask the group for help in addressing the problem. This might be an opportunity for a go-around, as in item 3 above.
· If all else fails, reduce your attention. Look away. Focus your body language on the group, rather than the disrupter. Let everyone know, through your eyes, body, and voice, that you are present to serve the entire group.