THE Centenary Year OF Rotary
President’s Report
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Greetings Fellows
Last week we were addressed by Rose Lynn an enthusiastic representative of the “Arts for Healing” program at Westmead Children’s Hospital. Rosie told us of the wonderful work that they do for the sick children at the hospital. You will remember a few weeks back a number of our Club Members visited the hospital to witness first hand the wonderful work done by this dedicated group of people to assist in the recovery of these children.
What they do with little funds is amazing. We will continue to look at our funds to see if we can help in some small way.
This week we have two representatives from the Interact club at Meriden school paying us a visit to extend their thanks for supplying chaperones and BBQ staff for their annual dance. Those Members are to be congratulated for their support of this function.
Fellows please don’t forget the upcoming Red Shield Appeal for the Salvation Army. The Salvos. Once again need our help particularly with drivers to assist collectors in doing their most important job.
Please help if you can
Thank you to George Hallworth who is standing in for me tonight as I will be flying to Adelaide for the day and will not be returning until late in the evening. I know that George will do a great job and get some valuable practice for July.
Please don’t forget Fellows to let me know the location of our Club equipment, I have not yet heard from anyone in possession of any equipment to enable me to compile an accurate list. Please ring me!
Enjoy the meeting, I will see you all next week, so until then,
LET’S CELEBRATE ROTARY,
President Keith.
To-Night’s Guest Speaker
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Alan Kelly
Royal Institute for Deaf & Blind Children
"Cochlear Implants"
Congratulations
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Birthdays
18/05/2005Ray Wilson
19/05/2005Tony Lanzafame
20/05/2005Richard Horwood
Anniversaries
NIL
Last Week’s Guest Speaker
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Richard Horwood introduced Rosie Lynne who is the Community Arts Manager at Westmead Children’s Hospital. Rosie runs the Art 4 Healing Project that was inspected by our Rotary Club last March. The Butterfly Effect in the Rotary Ward Block was sponsored by Strathfield Rotary and has been a spectacular success. Rosie’s mentor is Dr. David Bennett from the Adolescent Ward. The Art 4 Healing project is a means to help kids through their time in Hospital.
Rosie has been an artist for fifteen years and certainly demonstrated her enthusiasm with her talk. Last year 8,000 butterflies were gathered over 7 months and were used to convert a foyer area into a butterfly Cave. Rosie managed this feat despite her first encounter with Health Department Bureaucracy.
Rosie outlined the success of the butterfly effect and gave us an insight into future community projects at the Hospital that need the support of Rotary and the community generally.
The Hospital has 35 adolescent inpatients and over 100 outpatients at any one time. This progamme gives these children their own space within a foreign environment.
Euan Watson thanked Rosie for her talk and for her obvious dedication to her work.
Last Week’s Guests
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Chris Hazeldean from Bankstown Rotary Club.
Captain Tom Mc Lachlan from the Salvation Army Red Shield Appeal.
Last Week’s Announcements
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From President Keith Byrn:-
Butterflies for Westmead Children’s Hospital still available @ $10 each.
Commitment Sheet for Red Shield Appeal on Sun 29/05/05 to operate from StrathfieldTown Hall.
From Secretary Tony Lanzafame:-
Thank you letter from Exodus Foundation for donation of foodstuff
Invitation to the annual Meeting of the Ashfield Infants Home at 3pm to 5pm Weds 25/05/05.
Copy of the Rotarian received
Thank you from Tom Cullen for sponsorship of child to Disney Karate championship nest year.
From Captain Tom Mc Lachlan:-
Outline of Red Shield Appeal.
Funds raised to welfare including teenage programmes.
From Director Kevin Beltrame:-
RYPEN to be held from 20th to 22/05/05. Help needed for transportation.
From Brian Hennell:-
Trivia Night on Friday 12th August in the Wallace Hall at MeridenSchool Strathfield. Tables of Eight will be offered.
From Ray Wilson:-
Golf Day at Bowral on 26th May. Transport from Strathfield Golf Club at 8:30am.
From Roy Smidt:-
Moving to Geroa and may open an Ice Creamery in Kiama. Hopes to see Rotarians visit.
From Rod McDougall:-
Call for Photographs for the Change-over Bulletin.
The club now has many photographers and here is an opportunity to have that great shot published! Planning for the change-over bulletin, to be published next month, is underway and Rod McDougall would be delighted to receive photographs to be considered for inclusion in the centre page spread. Anything that is Strathfield Rotary related qualifies. With some computer magic that shot that you thought was too dark or blurry, may actually be OK. Digital or paper images are both acceptable. Rod will look after any originals that you submit and to return them promptly.
Raffle
The raffle raised $263.00.
1st prize Joe Saad-Golf Jumper
2nd prize Allan Petersen-Bottle of bubbly
3rd prize Kevin Beltrame-Dinner next meeting
Statistics
$107raised by the Sergeant.
13 apologies
1 non apology
Coming Events
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Trivia Night
Fri. 12th August at MeridenSchool. Organised by Brian Hennell.
Club Xmas Party 2005
Fri. 9th Dec. 2005 at the Golf Club as a transfer meeting. Partners Night.
District 9690 Conference 2006
7th – 9th April 2006 at the Panthers Convention Centre, Port Macquarie. Ted Ingall is conference Chairman again.
Next Rotary Meeting
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25 May 2005Barbara Banfield &"Ellie"
Guide Dogs for the Blind
Future Club Meetings
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1st JunePaul McKeon
"Seachange Guide"
Rotary Down Under
8th JunePaddy Kenneally
“East Timor History”
Partners Night
15th JuneWayne "Gus" Erickson
International Rugby Referee
22nd JuneChris Hohnen
Federal Law Reform
29th JuneCLUB CHANGEOVER
President George Hallworth's
Rotary Year 2005-2006
6th July ClubAssembly Dinner
13th JulyFather Columba McBeth-Green
Police Chaplin
Sydney OuterMetro Region
20th JulyJohn O'Grady
Sydney Skywriting
27th JulyDG’s visit at the Golf Club.
Partners Night. 6:30pm for 7:00pm
24th AugustTri-District Meeting at the Strathfield Golf Club.
Rotary Information Night.
Humour from Our Members
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Wisdom of Youth
From Joe Campisi
A teacher asked her class, "What do you want out of life?"
A little girl in the back row raised her hand and said, "All I want out of life is four little animals."
The teacher asked, "Really and what four little animals would that be sugar?"
The little girl said, "A mink on my back, a jaguar in the garage, a tiger in the bed, and a jackass to pay for all of it."
The teacher fainted.
Eight Special Words
From Steve Taylor
1.0THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female Any part under a car's hood.
Male The strap fastener on a woman's bra.
2.0.VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male Playing football without a cup.
3.0.COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female The open sharing of thoughts and feelingswith one's partner.
Male Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with theboys.
4.0COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.
5.0ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male Anything that can be done while drinking beer.
6.0FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
Male A source of entertainment, self-expression, male bonding.
7.0.MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.
8.0REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.
World's Easiest Quiz
From Steve Taylor
(Passing requires 4 correct answers)
- How long did the Hundred Years War last?
- Which country makes Panama hats?
- From which animal do we get catgut?
- In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
- What is a camel's hair brush made of?
- The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?
- What was King George VI's first name?
- What color is a purple finch?
- Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
- What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?
All done? Check your answers over the page!
- How long did the Hundred Years War last?
116 years
- Which country makes Panama hats?
Ecuador
- From which animal do we get catgut?
Sheep and Horses
- In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution?
November
- What is a camel's hair brush made of?
Squirrel fur
- The Canary Islands in the Pacific are named after what animal?
Dogs
- What was King George VI's first name?
Albert
- What color is a purple finch?
Crimson
- Where are Chinese gooseberries from?
New Zealand
- What is the color of the black box in a commercial airplane?
Orange, of course.
What do you mean you failed?
Disorder in the American Courts
From Steve Taylor
These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts,and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken downand now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calmwhile these exchanges were actually taking place.
Q: Are you sexually active?
A: No, I just lie there.
Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something thatyou've forgotten?
Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.
Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.
Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.
Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
A: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?
Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?
Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere