Your Window on the World’

(An extract from the Briefing Notes, ‘Got the Message?’)

We have now examined some of the principles and processes involved in communicating. Certainly in terms of ‘face-to-face’ communication, the most influential factor is simply that we are human beings, with all the benefits and shortcomings in communicating, which it implies.

Because we are ‘just human’, we do not always judge what we say or hear, in a logical way. It is as if we are looking out at the World through our own personal ‘window’. It is through this ‘window’ that we both send and receive messages. Not literally a window, of course, but a view developed over many years, based on our personality and attitudes, which directly influences all that our senses perceive. The four key factors that create the function on our view of the World are our Experience, Education, Beliefs and Environment.

Experience

Our experiences, acquired over many years, influence both the messages that we send and those that we receive. The assurance, by a prospective employer, that the job that you have just been offered is very secure means very little if you have been made redundant in the past. Perhaps, a salesman has once said to you, “I can assure you that this product will last you a lifetime”. Eighteen months later, the product failed. What’s likely to be your reaction and opinion if you are given such an assurance in the future? By the same token, if you have had good service from a supplier in the past, your interpretation of such a message is likely to trust what you hear. Both positive and negative experiences cause us to place relevant judgements on what we see and hear.

We must also guard against making immediate judgements of people that we have just met, based on other people, who we know or have known in the past. Appearance, voice, manner etc – something triggers the most unreliable perceptions. It is as if we are looking for a convenient shortcut to ‘pigeon-hole’ people and, in so doing, run the risk of expecting the same attributes and shortcomings from any new contact.

Education

The next component of our ‘Window on the World’ is Education. Obviously, this is, initially, defined by the formal education that we receive at school and university. However, our Education must also be seen in the wider context of specialist job training undertaken; any personal development that directs us into a particular type of job, trade, profession or vocation, eg. Engineering apprenticeships, MBAs, specific ‘on-the-job’ training etc. It is everything that informs our knowledge and skills.

This is one of the key considerations in every ‘face-to-face’ encounter. We must establish the Receiver’s general level of education and knowledge of the message’s subject matter, if we are to achieve understanding. Your job is not to act the Lexicographer (profession of writing dictionaries – see what I mean!). Using long or unfamiliar words might demonstrate your word power but, certainly, won’t help you to achieve your communication goals.

The problem can worsen. Many people are not prepared to show their own lack of education and training by admitting that they don’t understand. They decide to do some research after the encounter, hoping that they can make some sense of the message later. Rarely works.

We have already established that it is the Sender’s responsibility to ensure understanding. Make your assessment of the Receiver’s education and training standards and tailor your message, accordingly.

Beliefs

The belief systems that we establish for ourselves directly affect how we send and receive messages.

Our Beliefs set very clear standards of behaviour and lifestyle. They strongly influence the way that we communicate and the interpretation of messages that we receive. Messages are judged by those standards. Behaviours are pursued that are appropriate to those Beliefs. Such behaviours might be considered correct in some social contexts but unacceptable in others.

We all have a view of what we believe is proper, which varies one to the next. This has a particular resonance in matters of business. What represents good business skills in one organization might be perceived as sharp practice in another. It is a question of the standards against which it is measured.

Environment

We are all better able to send and receive messages in a familiar environment. It can be characterized in two ways.

  • There are the physical environments in which we exist. We have a home environment and usually a work environment in which we feel comfortable and in which we are used to communicating. It gives us a clear communication advantage over anyone entering our environment(s).
  • Our familiar Environments are inhabited by people with whom we have no difficulty in communicating. We feel more at ease dealing with people that come from the same social, professional, employment and geographic backgrounds as ourselves. We share similar educational, work and family experiences, the verbal ‘shortcuts’ of a common technical language, accents and dialects and so on. The closer the match of these characteristics, the easier, effective communication is achieved.

These four perspectives of our ‘Window on the World’ make up our Frame of Reference. We all have our own Frame of Reference, based on our Experience, Education, Beliefs and Environment. To improve our Communication skills, indeed, to improve our people skills, across the board, we must:

  • Be aware of our own Frame of Reference and its potential impact in any communication transaction.
  • Learn more about the Frames of Reference of the people with whom we have regular contact, so that we can improve the sending and receiving of messages.

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