TEEN QUEENS AND SWINGIN BLUE JEANS
THE CAST (number of lines – many will be ONE line or even ONE word. Those without lines need to sing along with all of the songs, some in full and some just the chorus. Those without lines are EXPECTED to learn song words and dances OR where is the challenge for them? They are VERY important to the success of the production)
Arty (Paul McCartney)(41) lines- lad at Youth club SINGS
Lenny (John Lennon)(42) as above SINGS
Harry (George Harrison) (16) as above SINGS
Derek (Ringo Starr)(18) as above SINGS
Brian/Briony (Brian/Briony Epstein)(10+) lad/girl at youth club Clever finance.
Christine(29) girl who likes Arty SINGS
Ray(31) Arty’s older brother likes Donna-cheeky guy SINGS
Eloise(20) Likes Lenny -SINGS
Roy/Rose(11) Youth club helper
Donna (14) likes Ray
Driverof coach (5)
Phil(24) Dad to Arty and Denise and in charge of the Youth club
Daisy(3)
Gary(13)
Denise(8) Arty’s sister
Barbara(11+) good announcer
Mr Book(3+) Auditor serious
Mr Ledger (3+)Auditor serious
Caretaker(10) grumpy
Jenny(8)
Judge 1 ( 3+) Competition Judge
Judge 2 (4+) Competition Judge
Man with haircut (3)
Southend Slugger (5) A boxer
Sandra (1)
SONGS-listen to tracks from stage show(+) most are condensed
LET’S DANCE+
THE WANDERER+
MIGHT AS WELL RAIN UNTIL SEPTEMBER
SHAKIN ALL OVER+
TO KNOW HIM IS TO KNOW HIM+
DO YOU WANNA DANCE+
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET SIXTEEN+
DONNA+
TEENAGER IN LOVE+
LET’S TWIST AGAIN+
I SAW HER STANDING THERE.
DA DOO RON RON+
TWIST AND SHOUT
SCENE 1 Youth Club-Auditions for the group
Daisy-What’s happening here?
Phil-Well we’re looking for a singer in the band
Daisy-What does he have to do?
Phil-Well he has to be the next Billy Fury
Daisy-Is he any good?
Phil-He’s not bad but it’s different in front of a crowd.
ARTY sings LET’S DANCE ( everyone sings as well) CAST DANCE
Arty-What do you think?
Derek-Yeah you got a great voice, but you need to loosen up a bit. It’s rock n roll. You could start by taking your school jacket off.
Arty-So, what do you think?
Gary-Not bad
Arty-Oh great
Harry-I still don’t see why we need a singer. Shadows haven’t got a singer.
Christine-I think Arty’s got a lovely voice
Arty-Well if you don’t want me
Derek-Hey we never said that.
Harry-I’m not sure
Gary-I think you should give him a try.
Dennis-Well he’s miles better than that skinny bloke from Dartford with the big lips.(Mick Jagger big lips-elbows in and out) Mick something he really fancied himself he did
Gary-Looks like you’re in
Dennis-Get some decent clobber.
Harry-Yeah we don’t wear school uniform. I think we should wait until we’ve seen all the applicants
Brian-He’s two hours late he’s not coming.
(ENTER LENNY)
Lenny-Are you a bunch of losers looking for a singer.
Christine-They’ve already got a singer.
Derek-What kind of guy turns up 2 hours late and expects to get the job?
Lenny-This one-hit it
LENNY sings THE WANDERER Cast sing as well. CAST DANCE
Gary-That was fantastic
LENNY-I was wasn’t I? Got a recording contract?
Gary-well…..
Dennis-No…….
Brian-We…….
Lenny-thought not, stick with me and we’ll be on Juke Box Jury by Christmas. Anyway what you called?
Harry-Well I’m Harry and he’s Barry
Lenny-No the group dumbo
Derek-We can’t ever agree on a name
Lenny-I like Captain Lenny and the Pirates
Gary-Why does your name come first?
Lenny-Cos it’s my group.Ok?
Arty-Well that was funny while it lasted
Ray-Fancy a game of ping pong?
Arty-Might as well.
Christine-(goes over to Arty)I thought you were just as good as him.
Arty-Oh thanks
Eloise-(to Lenny) You were amazing (group of girls watching).
Lenny-I barely got out of second gear babe
Eloise- My names Eloise by the way.
Lenny-Thanks for the info ‘Eloise by the way’
Eloise-Are you gonna stick around?
Lenny-Could do (he walks away)
Donna-Don’t chuck yourself at him
Eloise-You’re jealous
Jenny-He’s not interested
(Enter Phil or Phyllis YOUTH CLUB organiser with Roy)
Phil/Phyllis-Sorry to interrupt your youth club. Club announcements. Here are the results of the table tennis competition. In first place for the second year in succession Arty.
Arty-Thanks Dad (or Mum)(Give him a trophy)
Sandra-You only won cos your Dad(Mum) is club secretary.
Phil/Phyllis-This year’s summer outing is going to Southend (Cheers)
Roy-Get your names down
Phil/Phyllis-And finally the National Association of Youth Clubs is running a competition for the best concert put on by a youth club.
Roy-The prize will be £100but some of the songs have to be written by members of the youth club
Lenny-Any of you lot write songs?
Harry-You ever written a song before?
Lenny-well a bit
Harry-Did you hear weneed songs we’ve written and chart songs
(Enter the Caretaker)
Caretaker-So where’s the fuse box?
Denise-What do you want that for?
Caretaker-It’s my cribbage night tonight down the Nags Head me and the wife were just going out.
Barbara-What?
Caretaker-Someone phoned the wife to say all the lights had fused (looking up at the lights, which are on, confused scratching his head)
Barbara-What these lights? They’re still on.
Dennis-Got him (cheers)
Caretaker-Kids haha ha very funny
Ray-(to Arty)You should be in that concert. The song you wrote for Roy Orbison was really good. Did he write back?
Arty-(sarcastically) Yea he phoned me from Nashville the next day and asked me to fly over. I couldn’t cos I’d got double chemistry.
Christine-I’m going for it
Ray- You don’t even like pop music.
Christine-Well I do so. Have you heard of Carole King?
Ray-Who?
Christine-She wrote a song about the weather
Dennis-That must be very depressing
Christine-Well it’s not
CHRISTINE sings MIGHT AS WELL RAIN UNTIL SEPTEMBER (Backing and harmonies from all girls)
ARTY-I don’t suppose you fancy a dance
Eloise-I do as it happens but there’s no one here I fancy dancing with.
Lenny-(to Christine) That was pretty good
Christine-thanks
Arty-Do you fancy showing me how a song is put together?
Christine-might do
Arty-Shall we go back to your house?
Christine-Ok
Donna-(who likes Ray) Ray your sister really likes Arty
Ray-Does she
Donna-It’s incredible how boys miss things sometimes
Jenny-He’s got no idea she likes him
Ray-If some girl liked me I’d get it straight away.
Donna-Would you?
Jenny-Obviously (sarcastically)
SCENE 2 Christine and Ray’s house
Arty-For a minute I was a pop star and now I’m a has-been
Christine-Look I think you got a really good voice so don’t give up so easily
Arty-How do you write a song?
Christine-Keep the chords simple and the lyrics. C Aminor F and G and it just goes round and round.
Arty-so that’s how Carole King wrote that song
Christine-Yea and you can use it for your own words
(Ray enters)
Ray-I’ve arrived and to prove it I’m here
Arty-Christine is brilliant
Ray-Is she. Come on we’re off to the Odeon for a flick called “The Return of the Mummy”
Arty-Who’s mother is back?
Ray-Not Mummy like that stupid. Creepy scary old mummies.
Arty-Oh its about our mum?
Ray-I bet you daren’t say that to her. Anyway lets go
Christine- can I go?
Ray-you have to be !8
Christine-Well I’m 16 now and 17 next week
Ray-Yea but you look 14
(They leave)
SCENE 3 Back at Youth Club -Auditors
Brian-These are the auditors Phil they want to have a word about the missing £100 quid
Phil-What? He’s only joking ha ha ha (auditors don’t smile) yea nice to meet you.
Mr/Mrs Ledger-Joking? Losing money is no joke Mr/Mrs Croft
Mr/Mrs Book-In fact it’s very serious
Phil-No I haven’t really lost £100 he was….oh never mind
Brian-Oh course the depreciation pertaining to the asset is not paying out dividends.
Phil-He wants to be a business man him he’s showing off and being funny.
Mr Ledger-We wouldn’t want to see young people taken advantage of would we.
Phil-Cor you must be joking my lad takes advantage of me all the time.
Mr Book-Just a first visit
Mr/Mrs Croft as long as everything is accounted for you’ve no need to worry.
Mr Ledger-If it isn’t we’ll have to close the club.
Mr Book-Close the club? We haven’t had one of those for a long time.
(they go off muttering ‘close the club’)
Paul-You OK Phil
Phil-Those people give me the creeps
(Enter Ray and Arty)
Ray- ee ee ee
Dennis-What you doing?
Ray-When the Scorpion King jumped out of the sand dune it was scarier than when my Grandma stood on a jellyfish at Southend.
Arty-I dropped me Butterkist
Ray-Took him 5 mins to find it.
Eloise-If Lenny doesn’t get here soon I’m gonna burst how do I look?
Jenny-Like a right one
Donna-How is it every time you like a lad you go over the top like formica on a kitchen table
Eloise- Well I like him
Donna-Never
Jenny-Could have fooled me.
(Enter Lenny)
Derek-Hi Lenny
Lenny-Hi
Eloise-Hi Lenny
Lenny-Hi Eloise ‘by the way’ how could I forget
Eloise-How about a dance
Lenny-Well let’s see how good you are.
LENNY Sings SHAKIN ALL OVER - CAST DANCE
(Ray and Arty watch)
Ray-Shut your mouth the flies will get in.
Arty-How does she dance like that
Ray-She wasn’t doing it for your benefit
Christine-Hi Arty I’ve been working on another song
Arty-Oh really great. (then he ignores her) what a dancer.
Christine. Shall I play it for you?
Arty-What? No maybe some other time.
(Enter Caretaker)
Caretaker-Where is it ?
Derek-Where’s what?
Caretaker-The Wasp’s nest
Phil-I’m sorry mate I think you’ve been stung!
Gary-Got him (everyone cheers)
SCENE 4 Arty’s house
Denise-I’m sick of Arty moping about. You know he wants to leave school don’t you.
Phil-Girl trouble Denise that’s all
Denise-I know but it’s getting on my nerves.
Phil-He’s your brother that’s what brothers are like
Denise-He says Ray is earning £5 a week as trainee hairdresser and he only gets 5 bob pocket money. He wants an electric guitar, you know that don’t you.
Phil-What’s the matter with that Spanish guitar your aunt brought back from Rome.
Denise-Rome is in Italy dad and he says it’s rubbish.
Phil-you two cost us a fortune and me and your mother won’t go on the never never. Anyway why does he need a guitar when he’s got his table tennis.
Denise-Table Tennis isn’t Rock n Roll dad.
SCENE 5 Youth Club- Lenny’s songs
Lenny-Right gather round
Harry-How many songs have you written?
Lenny-Couple of dozen
Gary-Let’s hear ‘em then
Lenny-I listened to Christine this is about the weather
Harry-why?
Lenny-that’s how you write hits, listen
(sung to the tune “What do you want” by Adam Faith- This track will be on YOUTUBE)
“I got wet in the rain since I saw you baby
It went down my neck with a great big drip”
Dennis-Whoa stop
Derek-‘Great big drip’? You can say that again
Lenny-good innit
Harry-No! And it’s exactly the same tune as “What do you want” by Adam Faith
Lenny-I thought it sounded familiar. What about this one
(same tune as Take Good Care of my Baby by Bobby Vee-YOUTUBE again)
“Just admit that you love her
Just admit that you do
And if you should go tell her
That you’ve broke her best umbrella”
Gary-Stop stop “Take Good Care of My Baby” by Bobby Vee
Lenny-These tunes pop into my head
Harry-That’s because you’ve heard them before
Derek-song words aren’t all about the weather.
Lenny-look I got one more I know you’ll love this one
Derek-Ok last chance
Lenny-(sung badly-no real tune-make it funny)
“When you look as cool as me, life can be so hard
All the girls want a piece of me,like a slab of lard”
Derek-No no
Lenny-Don’t tell me someone’s done that before
Dennis-No I’m sure that’s completely original
Lenny-Really?
Derek-yea but maybe needs a bit of work
Lenny-So how are we going to write songs for the contest?
Eloise-I thought it was good Lenny
Lenny-thanks(turning away from her)
Eloise-What have I got to do to get noticed
Donna-Don’t be a prune Ellie of course he’s noticed you
Jenny-That’s why he’s pushing you off cos you’re so desperate
Donna-You’ve got to play ‘hard to get’ for a change
Eloise-But I’m not hard to get as far as he’s concerned
Donna-Pretend you are
Barbara-make him jealous, sing a song in the competition
Jenny-yea he wouldn’t expect that
Donna-Flirt with another bloke
Eloise-Like who? They’re all kids in this club
Barbara-Well it’s a youth club what do you expect
Donna-You know Arty fancies you
Eloise-He’s got more pimples than his ping pong bat.
Barbara-I think he’s cute
Eloise-look if we get something to sing in the concert maybe it’ll get his attention
Eloise sings TO KNOW HIM IS TO LOVE HIM-harmonies from cast
Arty-Eloise is thinking about going to Southend with me
Ray-Good for you mate
Christine-What do you mean ‘good for you’? She’s obviously using him, all the time she was watching Lenny to see if he was jealous.
Ray-so are you jealous
Christine-No that’s not it. Us girls are just as good as these boys. Let’s see what we can do.
SCENE 6 Getting on the coach to Southend
Driver-Hello mate is this your group?
Roy-Yes that’s us for Southend
Driver-Did you see that new programme on the tele last night?
Roy-What’s that?
Driver-Coronation Street
Roy-Yea who was that old battleaxe with the hairnet?
Driver-Ena Sharples
Roy-I couldn’t make head nor tail of it.
Driver-Nor me I’m sure it won’t last.
Phil-Right everybody here? Get on the bus
Roy-Stop pushing, calm down, sit down. Sit down so we can count you in
Phil-Right listen listen come on. we’ll be in Southend in about an hour so let me remind you of a few do’s and don’ts. No rowdy behaviour, don’t let the club down,
Roy-stick with your mates and remember
Phil-I want everyone to meet at the Big Dipper at 1 o’clock for something special
Sing DO YOU WANNA DANCE-Whole cast and dance
Ray-You ok sis?
Christine-I’m going to get a toffee apple
Ray-I’ll come with you
Christine-I wish you’d stop following me around I’m a big girl now I’m 17
Ray-That’s why mum told me to look after you
Eloise-You got any plans Arty?
Arty-Yeah I’m gonna work really hard at school, pass all my exams and get a job in a bank.
Eloise-I meant tonight actually nevermind.
Arty-I would have got you a goldfish if the coconuts weren’t glued on.
Lenny-How about the rifle range
Eloise-I want you to get me some candy floss
Arty-I’ll have a go on the rifle range. Come on I’ll beat you.
Eloise- So much for romance.
Christine-Come on we don’t need them we can go on the waltzer
Southend Slugger (Boxing gloves on)-roll up roll up win 20 shillings one whole poundif you can last 3 rounds with the Southend Slugger. Come on lads fancy your chances?
Gary-I could knock him out
Jenny-You couldn’t knock the skin off a rice pudding
Dennis-( to one of the girls)You got more of a chance than him. Hit him with your Hair do
Phil-I want everyone back on the coach on time tonight.But we are here now because it’s a special day for someone.
Roy-We want to say to Christine Happy 17th Birthday (cheers) we haven’t got an exact song for 17 but here we go.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET SIXTEEN all sing
Lenny-Happy Birthday (hands present) ( say it wrong as in Channel) it’s Channel number 5, I couldn’t find 1,2,3 and 4
Christine- Oh thanks it’s French you say it Chanel Number 5 (She says it correctly )
Lenny-thanks for giving me all those weather tips
Christine-(she looks confused)
Arty-I got you something (passes small tube) It’s Max Factor lipstick
Christine-Oh thanks
SCENE 7 SOUTHEND AMUSEMENTS AND SOUTEND SLUGGER
LENNY AND CHRISTINE GO OFF TOGETHER
Ray-Why are you so cheesed off.
Arty-Lenny and Christine
Ray-He’s not so bad he took me for a ride in his Vauxhall Velox last week. It’s got a heater…..and a radio!