The leg-liftin’, butt-sniffin’ TrailDawgs proudly present
Stumpy's XI
our 11th annual 26.2 mile run for pack supremacy
7AM Sunday, September 9, 2012
Newark, DE /

It’s hard to believe that another year has passed since our 2011 sorry display of athletic mediocrity. The participants of Stumpy’s X left the parking lot displaying the full effects of their endorphin high by screaming, “Let’s do that again!” Like a new mother leaving the delivery room, they completely sublimated the recent agonies of a trail marathon (analogously described as pulling your lower lip out and over your head), and added, “See you next year!”

An equally enthused and brain damaged RD failed to note the implicit threat contained in that last statement, so once again Stumpy is hosting his patented leg-lifting, tail-thumping, crotch-sniffing TrailDawgs Marathon.

The "course" (that’s what we call it) is an “easy” (we call it that, too), overland ramble that is guaranteed to be a minimum of 26.2 miles, and seldom exceeds 28 miles. It will be vaguely the same as last year's “course”, except those portions that we forgot and those trail sections that our crack volunteers mis-marked, and the start/finish locations have changed. It spans 3 parks and 2 states, including gently undulating hills, several creek crossings, educational historic markers, single track trail, dirt/gravel roads, and a few level stretches where you can open up that dawgie stride. For those who like to run pavement, the trail crosses a few actual roads.

In the past a few runners have mentioned minor inconveniences such as getting stung by swarms of angry yellow jackets; getting chased by rabid foxes; and finding fully-engorged ticks on their ticklish parts. We were hoping the state parks people would address these inconveniences, but since Stumpy’s runs beneath the radar, they couldn’t know that. The best we can suggest is that you picture yourself in a happy place with bright, breezy meadows, shaded pathways through primevil forests, and pretty wood bridges over icy-spray producing brooks. You’re on your own with tick removal.

Race amenities include: a scenic racecourse with several directional markings, a place to start, and a clearly defined finish where you can record your finish time, if you know it. Many finishers will receive a handshake from Stumpy himself. All participants who complete the event, or claim to have finished it, will receive an authentic and much sought after TrailDawgs Finisher’s Rock (accept no substitutes). Cash awards have never been distributed, but hope springs eternal. Numerous water stations have been designated, and we hope to actually have water at some of them. However, you should carry at least 20+ oz. of your preferred beverage in a refillable container, since the maximum distance between water stations may range anywhere from 5 to 26.2 miles. In prior years we had a trained masseuse giving free post-race massages, and she may be at the finish again this year. (Whatever he tells you, do NOT let Stumpy try to give you a massage!) No race amenities are guaranteed, but you will get more than you paid for.

Our motto is, “It’s not a trail race if nobody gets lost.” You enter this race at your own risk, and are solely responsible for your own welfare and safety at ALL times. Don’t blame any race volunteer or organizer if you wander off trail, can’t find a porta-potty in time, run into trees, trip over rocks or roots, fall down, get bitten by God knows what, get run over crossing a road, drown in the creek, or otherwise injure your body or self esteem. The race course may include: dirt, bugs, water, dirty bugs, dirty water, mud, rocks, roots, fallen trees, muddy squirrels, dirty snakes, the toothless guys from Deliverance suggesting you make a noise like a piggie, and other low-down nasty stuff. Think of it this way: If even one runner completes the course without injury, then you could have done it too. If anything goes wrong, IT IS YOUR OWN DAMN FAULT. The act of starting this race, implies your complete agreement with the foregoing statement.

Last year’s race was, once again, a huge disappointment for the organizers, because the weather was okay, runners could actually see most of the trail marks if they looked closely, aid stations had actual people handing out stuff, the rangers weren’t needed to “put down” any injured runners, and all the people who came out looking for a spouse or whatever went home with somebody, even if it wasn't who they arrived with. But this year we are anticipating overnight rain to wash away trail marks, followed by humid, 100+ temps; way more ticks, poison ivy and other fun stuff; aid station volunteers who'll get bored ridiculing exhausted runners and quit early; armed and hostile property-owners who will be ready for us this year; and various other screw-ups to make this year’s event way funner than last year's.

Registration is free, simply visit raceit.com at this address: https://www.raceit.com/register/?event=12596

It would be really swell if folks would actually let us know they're coming, like before they show up on Saturday morning. PLEASE REGISTER!
Stumpy has been making regular deposits into the Bank of Marital Bliss so that Mrs. Stumpy may feel inclined to host yet another pre-race pasta feed chez Stumpy the night before. But you aren't invited if you don't pre-register.

Here is a candid shot from Stumpy’s of a typical TrailDawg who unfortunately forgot the necessary paperwork before beginning the race, and had to eat fast food instead of the pasta feed.

Stumpy's Marathon--Participant Waiver: I know that running a trail race is a potentially dangerous activity. I certify that I am medically fit and properly trained for this event. I acknowledge that the course will include dangerous footing, traffic at road crossings and other hazards, and I assume full responsibility for all risks I incur in running on it. I understand that such risks include, but are not limited to: injuries from falls, collisions with people and/or objects, heat, humidity, dehydration, getting lost, ticks, insect bites, poison ivy, physical exhaustion. Knowing these facts, and in consideration for being allowed to participate in this event, I hereby for myself, my heirs, executors, administrators and other claimants on my behalf, agree to hold harmless, waive my right to sue and exempt from all liability any member of the TrailDawgs, any county or state park agency or employee, the race director, any course official, volunteer, sponsor, or anyone else associated with this event, for any personal injury, death, damage or loss of property or other harm that I may suffer from this event. In plain English, if I get injured in any way by participating in this run, it’s entirely my own damn fault and I’m not going to blame or sue anyone else for it. BY MY SIGNATURE BELOW OR MY PRESENCE AT THE EVENT, I ATTEST THAT I HAVE READ, UNDERSTAND AND AGREE TO THIS WAIVER:
Name: ______
Signature:______
Date: ______

Race Start/Finish Location: Main parking lot of New Castle County’s PaperMill Park, at the intersection of Polly Drummond Hill Road and paper Mill Road (Newark, DE 19711). See:

http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=582+Polly+Drummond+Hill+Road,+Pike+Creek,+DE&aq=0&oq=582+polly&sll=37.0625,-95.677068&sspn=32.939885,56.337891&vpsrc=0&t=h&ie=UTF8&hq=&hnear=582+Polly+Drummond+Hill+Rd,+Pike+Creek,+New+Castle,+Delaware+19711&ll=39.739716,-75.721636&spn=0.007805,0.013754&z=16&iwloc=A

Directions From MD, VA on I-95N: Take Newark/Elkton exit (last MD exit before DE toll) east into Newark. After ~3 miles, Elkton Rd. narrows and merges onto Delaware Avenue. Go through UD campus, then left at Burger King onto Chapel Street. Go straight through and out of town, Chapel St. becomes Paper Mill Rd., go ~2 miles up long hill past Shell Station then another 2 miles to soccer fields on right. Make right onto Polly Drummond Hill Rd and immediate right into park. Follow driveway to the pavillion, park and run.

Directions From NJ & PA on I-95S: Take DE I-95 exit 4 onto Route 7 NORTH. Go ~3 miles on Rt. 7 through any turns & traffic lights, straight through huge, Rt. 2 (Kirkwood Hwy) intersection. Go ~3 more miles, turn left 2nd light past K-Mart onto Paper Mill Road. Turn left at 2nd light onto Polly Drummond Hill Rd (soccer fields visible) and immediate right in to park. About 1/2 mile in turn left onto long dirt/gravel driveway into Middle Run Natural Area. Follow driveway to the pavillion, park and run.


Local Accommodations (as of Sept, 2001):

Best Western Delaware Inn
260 Chapman Road (I-95&273)
Newark (302) 738-3400
1-800-780-7234 reservations / Red Roof Inn
415 Stanton-Christiana Road (I-95&7N)
Newark (302) 292-2870
1-800-THE ROOF reservations / Fairfield Inn Newark/Christiana
65 Geoffrey Drive
Newark (302) 292-1500
1-800-228-2800 reservations
Courtyard Suites by Marriott
48 Geoffrey Drive
Newark (302) 456-3800
1-800-321-2211 reservations / Comfort Suites
56 Old Baltimore Pike
Newark (302) 266-6600
1-800-228-5150 reservations / McIntosh Inn of Newark
I-95 & Route 273
Newark (302) 453-9100
1-800-444-APPLE reservations
Embassy Suites
654 S. College Avenue
Newark (302) 368-1000
1-800-EMBASSY reservations / Comfort Inn
1120 S College Avenue
Newark (302) 368-8715
1-800-441-7564 reservations / Christiana Hilton Inn
100 Continental Drive
Newark (302) 454-1500
1-800-HILTONS reservations
Sleep Inn
630 S. College Avenue
Newark (302) 453-1700
1-800-SLEEP INN reservations / Howard Johnson Hotel & Suites
1119 South College Ave. (896&I-95)
Newark (302) 368-8521
1-800-I GO HOJO reservations

Be aware that several of these motels/hotels/inns may no longer exist. Things change in 10 years. I don’t even know why I have included this list, yet again, in this document. They have this new thing now called the interweb or some such. Use it. If you call me, that is what I will do while you wait endlessly. And then I will put you up at Ed’s Beds (hourly rates!) just to teach you a lesson.

This is an organized “fun run” with our friends--no fee, no prizes, no wimps, no whining.
This is an authentic, deep-fried, certified and sanctified Trail Dawgs event (accept no substitutes!)...
basically what we do every weekend with our Dawg friends. http://www.traildawgs.org/

/ Stumpy’s Marathon
c/o Stewart Dotts
812 Branch Road
Newark, DE 19711

STUMPY'S MARATHON:
...because we can!