It All Started Because He Had Gotten Drunk

Loneliness and Love

It all started because he had gotten drunk.

Getting Aldric to the point of supreme intoxication was a feat in and of itself. To get him so drunk that he talked without stopping and wallowed in emotions he usually kept in check was even more so amazing.

The night was still young and his drinking partners had long since turned in. Aldric found himself alone for the first time in a very long time. He had been drinking with some of the Guild boys who were visiting Vanecia on work. Brexton had disappeared before the night had even begun to spend some time with Dessa. The two were spending more and more time together and Aldric was attempting to keep himself from being a third wheel. He felt, somewhere deep in his heart, that perhaps Brexton was ready to settle down. That maybe their years and years of being on the run while trusting only each other were coming to an end.

As he stood on the bridge that spanned the massive river that flowed through Vanecia Aldric stared at his reflection in the water. The moon was full and high in the sky above him casting him in an odd light. The waters were still but his vision had been blurred by the drink. He couldn’t recognize himself. He leaned over the edge of the bridge and tried to squint his eyes to get a better look. He reached up a searching hand to confirm that his glasses were still perched on his nose and felt a fleeting sense of comfort upon touching their metal frame.

Still, a clear image of himself was far from being obtained. Aldric groaned loudly and squatted on his haunches at the edge of the bridge. The couples who flocked to that bridge for a bit of romance stared at him with disgust in their eyes.

“Who is he?” whispered one man to his date.

“Is he going to kill himself?” whispered another.

“It’s not high enough for that,” another scoffed.

Aldric was far from deaf and could hear every condescending word. He giggled to himself (or thought it was just to himself) and pulled himself upright. As he straightened he felt himself waver a little. Catching the rail for support he snorted at the couples around him.

“All this love. All this love and none of it for me,” he murmured.

Stumbling slightly Aldric made his way through what seemed to be throngs of lovers and down the bridge. He melded into the darkness of the night and felt a sense of calm as it enveloped him.

Without a purpose or direction he wandered. The longer he walked the more sober he became. He passed by buildings and people without paying them much mind. As always the glasses he wore blurred his vision just enough so that the things he saw were not overly crisp or clear. His head began to pound as the withdrawal from the alcohol and the dehydration that accompanied it reared its ugly head.

He vigorously shook his head and that almost caused him to fall over. Catching himself on the side of a building he decided on a destination and continued walking.

It wasn’t long until the lights of Vanecia were behind him and he found himself in the gentle hills that surrounded the area. It was the beginning of summer so the grass was still green and the bugs slightly scarce. Aldric made his way up the hills until he reached the top of the tallest. It flattened out at the peak and made the perfect spot of him to lie on his back while staring up at the moon.

He did not have a timepiece so he could only guess at the time. But it didn’t really matter. Closing his eyes he breathed in the air. It had the smell of sunshine with an aftertaste of rain. The breeze that rustled the tall green grasses around him was warm and soothing. He breathed deeply and allowed himself some time to become one with the nature that surrounded him. It was one of his favourite pastimes; coming to a place where nature had the illusion of being untouched and clean. It was a place where he could find calm in his heart and his mind.

But the calm he realized he was so desperately seeking wasn’t coming to him.

Abruptly he sat up and rubbed his eyes. He stretched. He yawned. He decided to do some squats. With his arms stretched out in front of him he went about his exercise until he realized how ridiculous he must seem performing squats in the moonlight.

Throwing his arms up in defeat he fell back again until he laid out flat on his back. He looked up at the moon again but this time, he removed his glasses.

The scenery around him changed. The sounds heightened; his vision sharpened. He felt his heart begin to throb as his hands automatically reached for the daggers that hung at his hips.

Using all of his willpower, which was quite a difficult task since he had so much of it, Aldric forced his fingers to twinetogether and his breathing to steady.

For as long as he could remember if he could see with his naturally sharp eyes he had an urge to kill. To destroy. To maim. It was a product of his upbringing, of course, but it made things difficult in everyday life. He rarely took his glasses off and he never allowed himself to be in the presence of a normal human being without them on. He even wore them when he showered or bathed. The only times he took them off were for battle. For war. It was times like that he allowed himself to give in to his urges and his programming. He had trained himself to keep his eyes closed upon waking and reaching out for his glasses so that they would be on his face when he opened them. He had learned this at a young age. He had tried to sleep in his glasses before but he twisted and turned so much in his sleep he ended up bending them so much he almost had to get new ones.

The only person who had ever been able to survive an encounter with Aldric when he had his glasses off was Brexton.

“Brexton.”

The name escaped his lips with a twinge of sadness.

They had been together since before they could remember. For years they had been nothing without the other and now Brexton was beginning a life away from that. Away from the battlefield and away from Aldric.

He chuckled to himself, this time not caring how loud he was. No one would be out that late at night in the open fields around Vanecia. The threat of Byrnanian soldiers was too great for the average person to risk gallivanting in fields at night.

Soon I’ll be like this all the time, Aldric thought to himself.

He felt his stomach drop and his pulse quickened. He couldn’t remember a time when he was without Brexton. They had been together for so long that Aldric wondered if he could even identify himself as a person without Brexton being there.

For his entire life he had been with Brexton. They had been together in the war camp, they had escaped together, and they had battled together, lived together, eaten together. There were very few days in his memory where Brexton was not there. But those days had been growing in number lately.

They had known Dessa for the last six years and they had worked with her on many occasions. She had come to Vanecia before they had and was instrumental in their amalgamation into the underworld. She knew more about the mercenary bands that operated out of Vanecia and had connections in The Guild. She was quick with her words and her sword. That made her a valuable companion. In the last year or so Aldric had noticed the way she looked at Brexton. He knew they had slept together on many occasions previously, but this was different. This was more than just sex. He had noticed the same look in Brexton’s eyes whenever he talked about her, which was often. Never before had he seen such a glimmer when Brexton talked about a woman. Brexton had been hiring himself out as a gigolo ever since they had escaped the camp and was the one who brought the most money in. Aldric had never slept with a woman of his own choice. He hadn’t slept with a man of his own choice for that matter. To him sex was nothing to be proud of. It was a tool used for hurting others. Upon their escape he couldn’t bring himself to lay down with a woman out of joy. As he got older he had tried, but at the last minute he would panic and his instincts would kick in. So he never tried again.

There were many women in his past who tried to get close to him. They would bat their eyelashes at him and touch him lightly. They would whisper words of sweetness in his ears and though his body would react, his heart and his mind couldn’t agree. He kept a guard up around women since then. There had been a man once who had also tried to get Aldric to go to bed with him but he was able to carefully reject him. He had learned that he was not attracted to men so it was easier for him to reject their advances.

After they had escaped Brexton had used sex as a tool, a trade. He sold himself to men, women, young and old alike. If they paid, he would sell himself. Aldric had felt a pang of envy at that. He was jealous that Brexton was able to take something that had been forced upon them as children and turn it into an instrument to make money and survive.

But in the last year Brexton had stopped selling himself. He would sell his body in a different fashion and contract out through The Guild with mercenary bands and other jobs which were things Aldric had always done. Aldric had no qualms against cutting someone down. He took many assassination jobs because it allowed him to kill from afar. He preferred not to see the look in someone’s eyes as he took their life. Such a scene was unavoidable during battle and he had seen the look of terror in many men when they realized who he was.

Aldric had earned himself a reputation during his years contracting out through The Guild. They called him the “Blind Reaper” and he couldn’t help but chuckle at the title. In truth he was proud of himself for being able to create an identity that didn’t depend on Brexton. But that identity was not who he was all the time. The majority of his days were spent included with Brexton. They were a package deal and many times the two would refuse work if it was not to be completed together. They had once been approached by rival groups looking to hire one to destroy the other. Many times they had laughed over such turn of events.

Aldric looked up at the clear blue moon as it hung in the darkness. It was alone, high up there. Sure, it was surrounded by stars but none of those stars could come close to the moon. It was destined to be alone. Much like the sun, who was more alone. There were no stars that shone in the day.

“I am the sun, Brexton is the moon,” Aldric said softly to himself.

Indeed, Aldric was isolated and alone. He was like the sun in that respect. Brexton was alone, but he was not isolated. He was surrounded by others that couldn’t help but bask in his glow.

Absent-mindedly Aldric twisted the metal cuffs that covered his wrists. It was something he did without thinking whenever he was lost in thought.

He breathed out again and slipped his glasses onto the bridge of his nose. His surroundings took on a familiar fuzz and he felt his heart calm slightly. His breathing became steady again and he felt himself begin to feel drowsy.

He closed his eyes and breathed in the faint traces of summer. There was no one waiting for him that night. He wouldn’t be missed.

His thoughts drifted off into the darkness as slumber devoured him.

“Think he’s dead?”

“No no. He’s breathing, look.”

“Should we just take his stuff?”

“Are you an idiot? If we take his stuff we’ll have to kill him.”

“Ah, but that might be fun.”

Aldric was awake but as usual, kept his eyes closed. He knew his glasses were on but at the moment feigning sleep seemed to be key to his survival. He could identify four different voices. Male. They surrounded him. The sun shone on his face and lead him to believe that he had well overslept.

“Don’t you know who that is? If you think you can take his stuff and run, you’re kidding yourself. That’s the Blind Reaper, you idiots.”

The most recent voice was different from the other four, but familiar.

“Oh! Let’s kill him then. We’ll be able to rise up in the ranks if we do. We’ll get better jobs in The Guild if we do,” replied the sharpest of the voices.

“Hahahaha! Are you mad? You think you can kill him, do you? Even after I’ve told you who he is? None of you would stand a chance against him, even in his sleep,” the newest voice scoffed.

Ah, Aldric thought, perhaps I will be saved the trouble if I just pretend to sleep some more.

“What, and you do?” shot another.

“Of course I do. I’m higher in the ranks than you idiots are.”

By this time Aldric began weighing his options. He could bolt up, surprise them, and run off to Vanecia. He was confident in his speed and his stamina. It didn’t bother him in the slightest that people were plotting his death while he lay right there. It wasn’t the first time and it most likely wouldn’t be the last. There was a time when Brexton and Aldric had accepted a job to work with a mercenary group they had never heard of before only to have it turn into a sting operation. The people who hired them were actually comprised of those who had a grudge against them for various reasons. Neither Brexton nor Aldric had known this because the names and faces of most people weren’t important to them. Brexton was able to name them all, of course, as his mind was just built that way. But he had labeled them all as unimportant so he didn’t realize they were targeting them. His memory was second to none but his sense of danger was at the bottom of the barrel. They had been attacked in their sleep but it made no difference. Brexton and Aldric were able to wound or mortally injure all of the fifteen men who attacked them. They had laughed and drank a lot that evening.

Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to die, Aldric found himself thinking.

If he were to die, he wouldn’t have to deal with the impending loneliness that was creeping up on him. He wanted nothing more than for Brexton to be happy and he respected Dessa and enjoyed her company. He had known for a long time that the two of them were falling deeper and deeper in love. He felt that his existence was becoming more and more of a burden. He wasn’t confident that he could survive on his own. Could he live in a house on his own? Would he return to The Guild in Lenwood? Would he be able to stay away from the happiness that Brexton and Dessa were crafting together? He felt that if he stayed close to them he would end up hurting them. He didn’t want that. He didn’t want to hurt anyone, especially those two. He loved them more than he had ever loved a human being in his entire life.

He knew they had been holding back on his behalf. Sometimes when Brexton and Aldric would be at the public bath together and Brexton would start talking about Dessa he would quickly change the subject. Dessa didn’t come to their rooms in Vanecia as often as Aldric knew she wanted to. Brexton also tried not to be gone overnight more than twice a week.

Aldric felt pathetic. That was why when Brexton and Dessa had gone out for their evening Aldric had found some of the boys in the tavern and started drinking. He was self-medicating. He was attempting to drown the sorrow he felt as such a pathetic existence that his friends had to tiptoe their relationship around him.

It’s not like he would have gotten upset if they spent more time together. Or would he have? He didn’t know. His emotions were all a jumble. He felt as though he was losing a piece of himself as Brexton and Dessa became closer and closer. That foundation he had was crumbling away. How desperate was he to keep things the way they had always been? He supposed if he really wanted to, all he had to do was kill Dessa. If she was gone, Brexton would be alone and they would be back together again.