BOTH PARENTS HAVE EQUAL RESPONSIBILITY IN RAISING A CHILD1

Running Head: BOTH PARENTS HAVE EQUAL RESPONSIBILITY IN RAISING A CHILD

Both Parents Have Equal Responsibility in Raising a Child – Assignment 5

Janet L Jefferson

Strayer University

PHI 210 – Critical Thinking

Professor Erin Chrisman

February 28, 2013

Both Parents have Equal Responsibility in Raising a Child

Historically the responsibility of housework and childcare were primary responsibilities of the mother. Decades ago the mother’s role was to stay home and take care of the house and children as fathers were the breadwinners of the family. Times have changed tremendously, and in modern societies both parents have to work outside of the house. This creates a dilemma for most couples as to whose responsibility it is to raise a child. The answer is straightforward: both.

It is necessary for a child’s development that both parents be involved in their child’s development. “Studies show that children raised in intact families, i.e., with two continuously married parents, tend to fare better on a number of cognitive, emotional, and behavioral outcomes than children living in other family forms”(Kim, 2008). Children need the nurturing experience of being raised by both parents.As such, both parents should assume the responsibility together. Children deserve to have the involvement of both parents in their lives. After all in the majority of the cases parenthood is decided by both parents in despite of the family composition.(Why do children deserve to have both parents around? It is not that you are wrong but rather that this is a statement that you do not justify. Also, I think more should be said about how children fare better in each category. Listing it is rather general. Be more specific. How do children do better—or worse? Make this a more concrete issue. Last, your last sentence introduces another new thought. I have seen you do this in other papers. If it is a new thought, then it should be a new paragraph. Regardless, this thought needs more explanation.)

It is inexcusable that many parents avoid the responsibility of being parents and choose to leave all those obligations on the other parent. The situation is even worse when parents divorce and one, or both, party interprets the divorce as a freeing of responsibilities.They consider that the amount due for child support will make up for their absences. Such is not the case a parent that goes to visit their children every two weeks if they go are missing so much on the lives of their children and are affecting them psychologically.

Parents have different roles in the life of a child. A mother plays a relevant role in the first few months of a baby, but fathers are equally indispensable for the baby and the mother as the father is to support the mother. Parenthood is a serious responsibility that should not be assumed as an easy task.(You start by talking about assumptions some people make but then switch to talk about roles. These are two separate issues and should be in two separate paragraphs. Also, regarding roles: what roles exactly? What is it that each needs to do? This is too general a discussion. Regarding assumptions, you need to do more work here. How does this further your argument? How does this back up your thesis?)

Sadly, these days children are being raised in one-parent households, which creates some emotional challenges for those children. A study from Schaffer, Clark, Jeglic (2009) on the role of empathy and parenting style in the development of antisocial behaviors concluded that maternal permissive parenting contributes directly and indirectly to antisocial behavior as it has effects in the cognitive and emotional empathy development. Other studies have also determined that, in single parent’s households, discipline plans are weaker, and demands from the children are lower when compared to families in which both parents contribute to the raising of children.(Are you actually just discussing single mother households? If so, then state that at the start. If not, much of what you say when you get more specific focuses on households where only the mother is present. You may want to balance that a little more. More importantly, this paragraph needs more explanation. Discuss the emotional challenges in greater detail.)

Another issue is that single parents cannot transmit to their children the same affection patterns that a couple could transmit. Being a single parent causes some resentment against living as a couple and that resentment can be captured by the children and effect the emotional development of the child. The love between a mother and a father plays a significant role in their children, assuming that children learn from their environment then one can state that children learn to be affectionate from their parents. (What role exactly? Is it that a loving example creates a child who in turn is better able to love others? If so then state that. Again, be more specific—what exactly do you have in mind?)

Consequently, if both are not present in the life of a child the demonstrations of love and affection the child will receive will be different. It is obvious that single parents are affectionate with their children, but when children cannot experience the demonstrations of love between both parents love can be taught to children from the single approach of living at home. Children from single parent families miss the experience of learning affection from the experience of having both parents at home. (This should be connected to the paragraph immediately above.)

One can consider, however that parents should stay together for the welfare of their children; however, it is also necessary to consider that the children of divorce parents that have lived in a harsh environment in which disrespect and domestic abuse take place in the end benefit more from one side love that the parent who is caring for them can provide.(What is the purpose of this thought? This would seem to be a possible other side? But why stick it here in the middle?)

In terms of gender, child-raising may have some differences as there are situations in which a child may need to talk to the parent of the same sex about touchy personal matters. For instance, a girl may feel more comfortable asking her mother about her period, and a boy may feel more comfortable talking to his father about contraception. Furthermore, a girl may feel more support from her father when it comes to sports participation, and a boy may feel more relaxed about asking his mother about academic issues. These are just some examples that I have notices in my life experience, in the family.(Ok, but now connect this to your thesis. Your point is that a child needs to have both available for these discussions? Even if the parents were separated, why would the child not be able to go to either? Connect the dots here, so to speak.)

In addition, children whose parents develop a relationship with them will serve as a role model for the children on how to develop their relationships, as they will be able to understand the difference in dealing with both genders as they have experience a relationship with both a male and female role model. Consequently, by being involved in raising their children, parents are also investing in the future wellbeing of their children; most children will imitate their parents when it comes to raise their own families.(Again, connect this back to the prompt. How does this relate? How does this fit into the paper as a whole?)

Relationships are crucial for everyone, particularly for children to feel wanted and loved. Couples relationships are affected by parenthood for instance fathers are more involve in school activities than social activities (Papalia, Olds, & Feldman, 2007, p.536). Children benefit from having a strong relationship between themselves and their parents. Single parent children by being separated from one parent are missing the possibility of establishing a solid relationship with their parents as when they see the absent parent the relationship is more one of playing catch up with the parent than of nurturing as they do not get to spend an equal amount of time with the other parent. Children that grow up developing a secured relationship with their parents are more likely to learn to respect others and accept authority more easily than children who develop a relationship with one parent.(Your first two sentences are really awkward. Also, it seems that now you are making points that have already been discussed in the paper. If that is the case, then you need to go back and look at your organization. If a point has already been covered and you are not adding anything new, then you need to get rid of repetition.)

Children whom both parents are involved in their lives do not suffer the anxiety of having to separate from one parent or the other one. Those children feel that their parents care for their well-being. In addition, they feel supported by their parents as given that they are at home, and a problem arises they have a parent at home they can talk to about their issues. Furthermore, being raised in a single parent household also affects children's health in particular those who suffer from chronic conditions. The study from Thompson, Auslander & White (2001) suggests that children from single-mother families have more challenges to face when raising a child with a chronic illness.

I also like to recognize the effort some single parents put into raising their children by themselves. That being said, it is necessary however considering that some single parents punish the other parent by not letting him or her being present in the lives of their children. In turn, since they are the only caregivers for the children, they would be and feel they are the only ones who have a saying in the lives of the children. Such actions hurt no one but the children and when time comes those children will rebel and request to see the other parents, as it is a right that should not be denied unless the other person may endanger the life of those children.

Conclusion

In concluding, one can state that counting with both parents for the experience of raising a child is the best option to develop healthy emotional children. Therefore, both parents should assume the responsibility of raising their children to pursue a better outcome for their children. No child should go through the experience of missing a parent event after a separation they are ways for parents to be part of the lives of their children. Having both parents assume the responsibility of raising their children increase the possibilities of raising an individual with a more positive approach towards the child, the parents and society.

I think that the most important thing you can do to strengthen this paper is to sit down and make an outline. Put your thesis at the very top. Then write, in one sentence, the point that each of your paragraphs is arguing for. Ask yourself how that point backs up your overall thesis as well as whether you have already made that point.

You have a lot of thoughts here. I suggest that you cut the content down to, at most, three key issues and then spend time really explaining each issue, making sure to be specific, and really arguing for your thesis.

I am more than happy to discuss this more.
References

KIm, C.(2008) Academic Success Begins at Home: How Children Can Succeed in School. Retrieved February 27, 2013 from

how-children-can-succeed-in-school

Papalia, D., Olds, S. & Feldman, R. (2007) Human Development Tenth Edition. New York, NY: Mc Graw Hill

Schaffer, M., Clark, S., & Jeglic, E., (2009). The role of empathy and parenting Style in the Development of Antisocial Behaviors.Crime and Delinquency, 55, 586-599.

Thompson, S., Auslander, W., White, N. (2001)Comparison of Single-Mother and Two-Parent Families on Metabolic Control of Children With Diabetes .Diabetes Care February 2001 vol. 24 no. 2 234-238. Retrieved February 27, 2013