GPP3O – EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION

Categories of Nonverbal Communications

Body Language

Personal Space: This category refers to the distance which people feel comfortable approaching others or having others approach them. People from certain countries, such as parts of Latin America or the Middle East often feel comfortable standing closer to each other, while persons of Northern European descent tend to prefer a relatively greater distance. Different distances are also intuitively assigned for situations involving intimate relations, ordinary personal relationships (e.g., friends), social relations (e.g., co-workers or salespeople), or in public places (e.g., in parks, restaurants, or on the street. (Keltner, 1970).

Eye Contact: This rich dimension speaks volumes. Western culture values a fair degree of eye contact in interpersonal relations, and looking away is sensed as avoidance or even deviousness. However, some cultures raise children to minimize eye contact, especially with authority figures, lest one be perceived as arrogant or "uppity." When cultures interact, this inhibition of gaze may be misinterpreted as "passive aggressive" or worse.

Posture: A person's bodily stance communicates a rich variety of messages. Consider the following postures and the emotional effect they seem to suggest: slouching, stiff, arms crossed

Facial Expression: The face is more highly developed as an organ of expression in humans than any other animal. Some expressions often reveal feelings that a person is not intending to communicate or even aware of. Try to imagine what expressions would reflect the following: interest vs. boredom; surprise; confusion

Gesture: There are many kinds of gestures: shaking a hand, pointing, rubbing a chin, waving, narrowing eyes.

These, too, have many different meanings in different cultures, and what may be friendly in one country or region can be an insult in another (Morris et al, 1979, Maginnis, 1958).

Voice Tone

This category includes a number of sub-categories:

Inflection (rising, falling, flat...)
Pacing (rapid, slow, measured, changing...)
Intensity (loud, soft... )
Pitch (high, medium, low, changes...)

Think of the number of ways the word “NO” can be taken depending on your tone of voice…..

ACTIVE LISTENING

The Technique. Active listening is really an extension of the Golden Rule. To know how to listen to someone else, think about how you would want to be listened to. While the ideas are largely intuitive, it might take some practice to develop (or re-develop) the skills. Here's what good listeners know -- and you should, too:

  1. Face the speaker. Sit up straight or lean forward slightly to show your attentiveness through body language.
  2. Maintain eye contact, to the degree that you all remain comfortable.
  3. Minimize external distractions. Turn off the TV. Put down your book or magazine, and ask the speaker and other listeners to do the same.
  4. Respond appropriately to show that you understand. Murmur ("uh-huh" and "um-hmm") and nod. Raise your eyebrows. Say words such as "Really," "Interesting," as well as more direct prompts: "What did you do then?" and "What did she say?"
  1. Ask good questions to accomplish one of the following:

·  Clarify meanings: "I hear you saying you are frustrated with Johnny, is that right?"

·  Learn about others thoughts, feelings, and wants: "Tell me more about your ideas for the project."

·  Encourage elaboration: "What happened next?" or "How did that make you feel?"

·  Encourage discovery: "What do you feel your options are at this point?"

·  Gather more facts and details: "What happened before this fight took place?"

  1. Keep an open mind. Wait until the speaker is finished before deciding that you disagree. Try not to make assumptions about what the speaker is thinking.
  2. Even if the speaker is launching a complaint against you, wait until they finish to defend yourself. The speaker will feel as though their point had been made. They won't feel the need to repeat it, and you'll know the whole argument before you respond. Research shows that, on average, we can hear four times faster than we can talk, so we have the ability to sort ideas as they come in…and be ready for more.
  3. Engage yourself. After you ask questions, paraphrase their point to make sure you didn't misunderstand. It also helps the speaker because it gives them an opportunity to hear the interpretation of what they said, and therefore a chance to add to their statement. When paraphrasing, you restate the main idea of the statement and leave out the angry or accusatory words. Start with: "So you're saying…"
  4. Avoid letting the speaker know how you handled a similar situation. Unless they specifically ask for advice, assume they just need to talk it out.

Effective Communication Assignment

After reading about effective communication, reflect* on your communication style in your GPP30 placement.

(*Note in your reflection you should discuss what you do and how you could/should improve.)

In your reflection:

a.  discuss your body language – and the 5 sub-categories

b.  discuss your voice tone – and the 4 sub-categories

c.  discuss active listening and the 9 sub-categories