Name______Per______
Adult Roles and Responsibilities Study Guide
Unit 3 Dating
III. Students will list the functions and purpose of responsible dating.A. Identify and discuss the Functions, Purposes, and Stages of dating
1. Dating is about getting to know each other and getting to know______.
2. Identify the Purposes of Dating
SocializationRecreation
Mate Selection
wASSIGNMENT: GO ON A DATE ä
Plan and go on a date that costs $5.00 or less. The person you take out can be a friend, relative, parent, or brother/sister.
Complete the form for your date and have your date sign the paper. Have fun and follow the purposes of dating.
4. Dating can be misleading because ______.
5. The most stable and meaningful relationships are between people who ______each other well.
______alone is not enough for a relationship to be based on.
6. What problems can occur when the relationship physically progresses without the stability of knowing each other?
7. Name and Explain the 4 areas that we get to know a person (Over the course of 4 SEASONS):
S / CE / P
8. An important function of dating is to be able to compare ______and ______of your dates in different setting to discover the real person. You can learn something about ______too.
9. List 5 characteristics for each stage of dating.
GushyPlaying Games
Goal directed
11. What are the dangers when dating characteristics do not support your personal goals and values?
12. Questions to ask yourself about your dating experiences:
a. Am I in ______with this person or with the ______
b. Could I have just as much ______--doing the same thing with someone else or is it because
of this person?
c. Are mundane daily ______just as much fun to do together?
B. Identify the characteristics of Infatuation and Love1. Characteristics of Love
a. Love is vital to the ______of a person.
b. Love is based on and best expressed by ______.
c. There are many kinds of love that we need to receive ______
d. Before you can love anyone else, you must first love ______.
e. Kinds of Love
– Unconditional love asks for ______in return
– Companionship Love - a love typically found in good ______
– Platonic Love is based upon ______– not physical attraction
– Manic Love - ______kind of love.
– Romantic Love - ______
– Altruistic Love - ______or concern for the spouse.
2. Is it love?
Define Infatuation / Define Love3. Lasting Love or Infatuation? Put an “I” if the behavior is infatuation and an “L” if it is associated with love.
______Lauren admires Steve because of his honesty and sense of humor. She feels that she can discuss any issue with him.______Becky has fallen in love with a boy in her English class. She thinks he is good-looking and has a cute smile. She gets so excited about
going to English that sometimes she can’t eat lunch.
______Vernon and Esther talk openly with each other. They seem to really understand their feelings and emotional needs.
______Melinda feels that Trent enjoys dating her only because she helps him with his math homework. She ignores these
feelings when Trent tells her that he loves her beautiful brown eyes.
______Ricky was attracted to Claudia because she is a cheerleader. They have been dating 6 months and are strongly attracted physically.
______Terry does not want to risk hurting Scott so she avoids discussing issues that might hurt his feelings.
______The day Hal received news that he did not get the job, Jenna provided support and understanding and felt like it had happened to her.
______Ricki loves Howard so much that she never allows him out when another attractive female is around.
______Max helps Marilyn study and encourages her to get high grades and to go to class. He wants her to succeed.
______Dominick respects Shelley’s needs so he organizes his plans around her. Her well-being and happiness seem as important as his own.
4. Explain and diagram the Web of Love and Infatuation
INFATUATION LOVE
6. What is the danger of having a relationship based on Infatuation vs. Love?.
C. Assess dating behaviors that support personal values and identify personal responsibilities associated with dating.1. Alcohol and going steady are 2 factors that impact the chance of unintended or increased ______
2. A clear set of ______have the greatest impact on teens remaining sexually abstinent.
Dating Guidelines are designed to ______teens from situations they may not be able to handle.
HOW Do they do this?3. Sexual activity at your age is a big ______, and once you get involved in it you have a lot more to ______than you have to gain.
What do you have to lose / consequences?What are benefits of abstinence? (Mutual respect, not contracting STD, no chance of pregnancy)
A. Relationship Funnel Fill in the Word for each definition:
ACTIONS / INTIMACY COMMITMENT
Arm around shoulder / waist, Holding Hands, Kissing:______ / Casually dating a person, the relationship may be very casual and a friends only basis. Those involved in this type of relationship are most likely dating other people.
______
Heavy kissing and close physical contact.
______ / A progression of a relationship to the point that the couple is dating each other exclusively. ______
Exploring each other's bodies up to but not including intercourse.
______ / Dating one person only with the intention or agreement that you will marry—this agreement is usually accompanied by some token such as a ring. ______
Physical sexual contact between the individuals involving genitalia of both. (includes oral, anal, digital)
______ / Men and women are joined in a special kind of social and legal dependence for the purpose of founding and maintaining a family unit. ______
1. In the ______, most of us want to belong to someone and have someone belong to us. The excitement and thrill of the relationship moves us further and further into the ______.
2. Just as gravity would naturally pull you down a funnel, making it hard to stay near the top and not slip all the way through, our natural desires urge us through each level making it more ______ to pull ourselves out of it until we find ourselves at the bottom of the funnel.
3. Guys are generally aroused ______ than girls and it takes girls take a good deal of sexual contact to create arousal ______ to the guys.
4. Guys get outspoken ______ from friends and society that it is pressure that they make sexual passes. Guys feel they have to "live up" to the masculine stereotypes of sexual aggressiveness. Girls more often get the ______.
5. Girls send out signals to guys. Sometimes they don't even realize the kind of signals they are sending when they ______ the way they do.
B. SLIPPING THROUGH THE FUNNEL OF SEXUAL INTIMACY
1. In the funnel of intimacy, the body has many signals that urge us to go on from step to step. Only the brain signals "let's stop", but nerves in the mouth and tongue during a simple kiss, get us thinking about ______. Normal embracing during kissing touches nerves that get us thinking about exploring other parts of the body. Each step ______ you on to the next step.
2. Normal embracing during kissing touches nerves that get us thinking about exploring other parts of the body. Each step urges you on to the next step.
3. Both guys and girls will move down the funnel until they reach a "point of urgent need" where ______is lost, and physical need takes over (usually more quickly for guys). It takes two to keep in ______ of the situation.
C. COMPARE THE TWO FUNNELS: ----- The speed down each funnel varies
1. It can take years, or it can happen in ______. (sex happens in one night more often than marriage in one night)
2. Girls are usually more interested in pushing down the Commitment Funnel . Guys control ______ (guys ask, girls accept). Guys are usually more interested in pushing down the sexual Intimacy Funnel . Girls control ______ (she decides how far to let him go).
3. Girls and guys will use one funnel to bargain for the other: Girls give sex to get ______and Guys give ______to get sex!!
4. The earlier in age one enters the funnels, the longer one is faced with the problem of ______ down the funnel.
5. The more you date one person, the ______ the funnel becomes.
6. It is easier to break off a relationship than it is to ______the funnel.
7. Once you have gone down the funnel, future funnels are more ______.
8. Going down the ______ gives girls a different reputation than guys ("slut" versus "stud").
9. For any relationship to grow, there needs to be a ______between intimacy and commitment. If this balance gets too far out of line, then it will ______ the relationship.
Is Today’s ______More Important than my Future?
STATE #4 Write 5 of YOUR Personal Dating Rules and Responsibilities related to dating behaviors that will keep you safe and out of trouble. Identify which of your value(s) each rule or responsibility supports.These dating rules will:
1. Help me be responsible when dating.
2. Help me make decisions before a situation arises so I will not compromise my values.
3. If I choose to follow my rules then I will be confident and feel good about myself
1.
VALUE:
2.
VALUE:
3.
VALUE:
4.
VALUE:
5.
VALUE:
Complete the Parent and Student Survey and then discuss the answers and the family’s stand on dating and intimacy. Remember to get this signed.
D. Identify the dangers of physical intimacy during dating.
1. The media most often portrays the ______side of sexual activity.
What do they not show you?
2. Every time you have Sexual contact with another person you run the risk of getting an ______.
§ Over ______% of all STDs are contracted through sexual intercourse.
3. Mutual lifetime ______is the most effective way to prevent getting STDs
§ Birth control pills ______prevent STD’s from being contracted.
4. Most STDs can be ______.
§ Even if the symptoms of the STD disappears, the disease may still be doing ______to the body.
§ Once you are ______- of an STD, you can still be reinfected
5. Chlamydia is the most ______STD.
§ There is ______known cure for AIDS and Herpes
6. HIV can be transmitted through ______, vaginal secretions, and semen
§ The HIV/AIDS virus must pass from one person’s body fluids in to another ______.
§ A positive HIV antibody test means that the person has been infected by HIV and can ______
§ AIDS is contracted through intravenous drug use and/or ______
§ Aids is characterized by a reduction in white blood cell count and it can cause ______
7. What are some community resources and support groups available for assistance with STIs?
TAKE NOTES on the types and characteristics of various STI’s.Results / Risks from
TEEN PREGNANCY / FEMALE / MALE
Physical
Emotional
Educational
Financial
Societal
SEXUALITY RESPONSIBILITY CASE STUDY
1. Tom is a normal healthy 17 year old who has never had a serious girlfriend and has never had sexual intercourse. He met a girl at a party and one thing led to another and they ended up having sex. About two weeks later, Tom noticed a few sores on his penis (syphilis). He didn’t think that they were anything serious because they did not hurt very much. After a week the sores went a way.
Considering the consequences of Tom’s choice, what should Tom do? :
Who should Tom talk to and what should he say to them?:
2. Karen has a crush on Jim. She was excited when Jim asked her out on a date. On their first date, they went to a party. They were having a good time until Jim started drinking. He started touching her in ways that made her uncomfortable. Because she did not want to make a scene, she would quietly move Jim’s hands a way from her body. Jim did not seem to notice that she did not really like his touches and he continued his behavior. Karen did not know what to do and she really liked Jim so she let him just continue. Later, Jim suggested that they go to his car.
What is the problem?
Identify Karen’s choices.:
Consider the consequences of each choice.:
Make a decision – what should Karen do?:
3. Lisa was on a date with her boyfriend mark. They went to a movie and, as usual, they parked for a while in the foothills before he took her home. They often petted, but Lisa had been very clear about how far she would go and Mark had always respected her limits. One night, Mark became upset when she set down the limits and before she knew it, Mark was forcing himself on her. She did not know what to do, but when she struggled, her clothes ripped. Mark apologized quietly and took her home. She left the car quickly without saying goodbye.
Identify the problem:
Identify Lisa’s choices:
Consider the consequences of each choice.:
Make a decision – what should Lisa do?:
ASSIGNMENT - WRITE A LETTER TO A FRIEND
You have a friend (fictional or real), that is thinking of becoming sexually active or already is. Knowing what you know now, write a letter to them expressing your concern for the choices they are making and the possible consequences that could result from it. Begin your letter with DEAR and end it with your name. This will be handed in to me.
E. Define violence, abuse, and various sexual violations and abuse including sexual harassment.
CHARACTERITICS OF AN ABUSER / CHARACTERISTICS OF A VICTIM
1. Violence Cycle : Explain each stage and give examples that would be seen in each stage of the cycle: