You Re a Firework

You’re a Firework!

Judaism and Self Esteem

Goals:

USYers will understand each of their own greatness or uniqueness through the Jewish value of bitachon atzmi or self esteem
USYers will explore how each of them can learn to release their own “fireworks” or greatness inside through 10 different paths to self esteem (Wayne Dyer book).
USYers will recognize that each of us is a creation of God, unique in our own ways and it is up to us to let our greatness and uniqueness out.

Preliminary: Youtube “Firework” video:

Materials:

1 copy of “Incredible You! 10 Ways to Let Your Greatness Shine Through” by Wayne Dyer
1 copy of each page of the book as a handout (they will be split into groups so you only need one copy of each page)
Bitachon Atzmi handout (Jewish sources on self esteem) copied back to back with “Firework” lyrics

Step 1: Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Mirror, Mirror Activity from Love Your Neighbor, Love Yourself: Building Healthy Relationships, (USY 2009), pages 63-64

Ask USYers if anyone has seen the movie “Shallow Hal.”

[note to educator: In this movie, Hal, a shallow, “womanizer” only seeks women who are “Hollywood” beautiful. He falls under a spell where he begins to see women for their inner beauty as opposed to their outer selves. Women who he would have considered unattractive, appear attractive to him when he gets to know them. Women who never would have met his standards for physical beauty become attractive to him when he recognizes their inner beauty.]

ASK: Why are so many of us like Shallow Hal? Why do we struggle to see inner beauty and judge, criticize and compliment instantly for outer beauty? Why are we most judgmental and critical of ourselves?

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall:

This is a solitary exercise. Ask USYers to please take it seriously and be honest with themselves. It is for their benefit that they take this seriously.

Instructions: Imagine you have a mirror in front of you. But instead of your outer reflection, this magic mirror, allows you to see your inner self.

What qualities do you see that you wish others could as well? What “fireworks” are whining you, waiting to be ignited for others to see?

Ask to share if they are comfortable, but to keep these inner “fireworks” in mind throughout the pe’ula/kita, if they don’t feel like sharing.

Step 2: Discuss

Why do we struggle to even come up with “inner fireworks?” Why is it so easy to say “I hate my nose or my muscles are too scrawny,” but so difficult to say “I’m funny” or “I’m lucky that I’m such a patient person?” Why do we struggle to release our inner fireworks and let our greatness shine through?

Get responses from USYers.

Step 3: Firework- use song to introduce Jewish concept

----hand out lyrics and Jewish text sheet---

As a group, read or sing the lyrics to the song “Firework.” Ask USYers to focus on the bolded text (and if you watched the video to recall some of the images from the video that reflected the lyrics).
What message does she give according to the bolded text? What is Perry trying to tell her audience members? What does she mean when she says that “you’re a firework?”

Explain:

Perry expresses the Jewish value of Bitachon Atzmi or the importance of self esteem. In Jewish tradition, each of us is made B’tzelem Elohim, in the image of God. Each of us is unique and should value ourselves as a unique creation of God. Bitchon Atzmi is the Jewish way of saying “Baby, you’re a fire work…you just gotta believe it.”

Ask for volunteers to read each text and ask the group for examples of each.

Question for text 1: Being true to yourself. Do you struggle with this sometimes? What is makes you, you? How can you let others see this?

Text 2: We’re all unique- each of us is human, but each human is unique. Think of your best friend. What makes you alike? What makes you distinct from each other? How does this impact upon your friendship?

Text 3: Which do you find more challenging: humility of self esteem? How can we create this balance in our own lives?

Step 4:Let your Greatness Shine Through

Practicing Bitachon Atzmi

Most of us struggle to find that uniqueness expressed in these texts, the special qualities within each of us that makes us each one-of-a-kind. Most of us struggle to let our own greatness shine through, to release our inner fireworks. What makes you unique? What is your “ness?”

Quick warm up activity: Your “NAME-ness”

Adapted from exercise from film “You, Me and Dupree”

Stand in a circle and have everyone come up with “their name-ness”, something that really makes them who they are, makes them unique. Ask them to step forward and say it.

Examples:

“My Amy-ness is that I greet everyone I meet with a smile. My Amy-ness is that I am friendly to everyone I meet. Every deserves a chance when I first meet them.” Or “My Jacob-ness is that I’m a team player in sports. There’s no point in playing a game for yourself. You gotta play as a team.”

Ask: What did you learn from this? Feel kind of silly, but get the point?

Explain: Like Rabbi Zusya in the text we read, wanted to make sure he stayed true to himself, and hold on to what made him who he was, each of us has a “ness” a unique quality or characteristic that can let that firework out. For those of you who struggled to find your “ness,” there are other ways to let your greatness shine through.

Introduce book:

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is You'er than You.” Dr. Seuss wrote this one, but another great children’s book, “Incredible You” sends a similar message.

Introduce book to USYers. Explain that this children’s book has 10 steps to toward letting our greatness shine through. Although meant for children, there are lessons in here for any age.

Step 5: Let Your Greatness Shine Through

Applying the texts and core concept to their own lives

Break the circle up into pairs.Give each group pages form the book, 1-2 of the 10 examples of how to let your greatness shine through (depending on size of group)

Instructions: Explain that Wayne Dyer outlines different ways for people to think about what makes them special and different strategies for building Bitachon Atzmi. Each pair has 1-2 examples from the book

Instructions: In partners, read the idea (s) from the book and with the Jewish texts on uniqueness and bitachon atzmi in mind, think of different ways someone can actually practice this idea in their own lives. Come up with an example that you can use to apply this idea to your own life in order to build you own sense of worth and reflect what we read about Bitachon Atzmi in Jewish tradition.

In your pair, think about:

What is the challenge to practicing this? Why do you think we struggle to follow this step?
What is something we can DO to follow this advice?
If you could explain to Dyer why this step is difficult for you, what would you say and how would he respond?
Do you think this book applies to adults at all? What can adults learn from this message to children?
Which ones are harder for you to practice than others? Sometimes, it’s easier to help other see their self worth and in turn learn to “practice what you preach.”
If you were presenting this book to a group of younger children, what ideas would you give them to illustrate each step?
Using your favorite one as an example, come up with an activity or exercise that you would use to teach this step to someone who really needed a boost in their Bitachon Atzmi. Use the discussion questions from the book to help you fully understand how to achieve that step.

Share an example to get them thinking: #2: “Do What You Love”- Just because you’re not the best basketball player or you don’t play an instrument, doesn’t mean you’re not “good at anything.” Where does your personality shine through? With what do you have the most fun? An activity I would do to uncover “what you love” is to write or draw on a piece of paper “my happiest day” and analyze your description for what made it happy. Were you with people? Then you’re a “people person.” Were you building or creating something? Then that’s something you love!

Step 6: Present and Discuss

Have each group read the verse on their page and explain their example of how to incorporate this idea in “real life.”

Pose some of the questions above, depending on what they present. Example: Why would this be challenging for someone? Is this “easier said than done?” In what ways can we actually try this on our own? How does this help someone be their best selves?

Step 7: Summarize and Conclude

Repeat concept- Bitachon Atzmi and a recognition of the uniqueness in each of us. Judaism emphasizes the uniqueness of the individual through Bitachon Atzmi. Each of us is a “firework,” each of us has a personali obligation to release that spark and let others see our “NAME-ness.” Try to incorporate at least ONE of the steps we heard about today in your own practice of Bitachon Atzmi because we’re all “FIREWORKS!”

TAKE HOME EXERCISES ON SELF ESTEEM- For anyone who wishes to explore this topic further, try these solitary exercises on your own

Baby, You’re a Firework!

self esteem, confidence.

Read the following 3 texts and explain how each can remind us to embrace ourselves and appreciate that we each have something to give.

How does each text instill in us the Jewish value ofself esteem, confidence?

1. Be You!

1. There is a powerful story told of the great Hasidic Rabbi Zusya. When Rabbi Zusya was about to die, his students gathered around him. They saw Rabbi Zusya's eyes break out into tears. "Our master," they said with deep concern, "Why are you crying? You have lived a good, pious life, and left many students and disciples. Soon you are going on to the next world. Why cry?" Rabbi Zusya responded, "I see what will happen when I enter the next world. Nobody will ask me, why was I not Moses? I am not expected to be Moses. Nobody will ask me, why was I not Rabbi Akiba? I am not expected to be Rabbi Akiba. They will ask me, Why was I not Zusya? That is why I am crying. I am asking, why was I not Zusya?"

2. What makes you special, unique:

If a person molds several coins from the same die, they all resemble one another. But, although God fashioned every man in the stamp of the first man [Adam], not a single one is exactly like his fellow. Therefore every person is obliged to say, the world was created for me”. (Mishnah, Sanhedrin 37a).

3. Balancing Bitachon Atzmi and Anavah (humility)

A Hassidic Story:

Rabbi Simcha Bunam used to say, "Every person should have two pockets. In one, [there should be a note that says] bishvili nivra ha'olam, 'for my sake was the world created.' In the second, [there should be a note that says] anokhi afar va'efer, 'I am dust and ashes.'"

On days when you’re feeling down, like you have nothing to give, reach into your pocket and remind yourself that the world was created for you! There is a special place in this world for all of God’s creatures.

Firework

Lyrics and Music by Katy Perry

[focus on bolded words]

Do you ever feel like a plastic bag
Drifting through the wind, wanting to start again?
Do you ever feel, feel so paper thin
Like a house of cards, one blow from caving in?
Do you ever feel already buried deep?
Six feet under screams but no one seems to hear a thing
Do you know that there's still a chance for you
'Cause there's a spark in you?
You just gotta ignite the light and let it shine
Just own the night like the 4th of July
'Cause baby, you're a firework
Come on, show 'em what you're worth
Make 'em go, oh
As you shoot across the sky
Baby, you're a firework
Come on, let your colors burst
Make 'em go, oh
You're gonna leave 'em falling down
You don't have to feel like a waste of space
You're original, cannot be replaced
If you only knew what the future holds
After a hurricane comes a rainbow
Maybe you’re reason why all the doors are closed
So you could open one that leads you to the perfect road
Like a lightning bolt, your heart will blowAnd when it's time, you'll know
[chorus]

Boom, boom, boom
Even brighter than the moon, moon, moon

It's always been inside of you, you, you
And now it's time to let it through

Bitachon Atzmi Self Exploration Exercises

Be who you want, but also beyou!

2. What makes you special, unique:

Exercises:

“Baby, you’re a…”- Katy Perry uses a firework as a metaphor to explain that everyone has the potential within them and have to learn to let it out. Think of a metaphor for what/who you are. ExaMPLE: Sometimes, I feel like I’m a football player. I know the rules of the game, I try to keep the play going, but sometimes I fumble the ball, sometimes I toss the ball hoping I’ll score and I don’t. Sometimes I just get tackled by others and end up face down. But I always get back up.”
Draw out the shape of a human body. Draw arrows from different parts of the body where you feel is the source of your uniqueness. Example- an arrow from the heart because you are a kind person with a big heart or an arrow from the hands because you’re uniqueness comes from your artistic talents.
Put sticky notes on your mirror that indicate your inner qualities so that when you try to beat yourself up when you look in the mirror with critical comments, you can see the positive Post-Its that show your greatness
Draw a picture of yourself at school, home and at an extra-curricular activity. What does each person look like? How does each person combine to make one incredible you. Example: you may not be strong academically, but maybe that “after school sports” you is a superstar! Look at the complete picture and who you are in each role you play.
Write a Horoscope for yourself for 5, 10, 20 years from now. Give the 5 year one close to you and make sure you’re on that path today. Hide the other ones for the future and make sure you’re able to stick to your goals.
Imagine you overheard people talking about you. Write out what you hope they would say. Next, write out how you will behave to ensure that this is what others would say about you.
Imagine your perfect life. Describe it on paper. Is it realistic? Cross out the words that are unattainable or unrealistic. Circle the words that can help lead you to who/where you want to be. Hang this up in your locker or room to remind yourself of those circled words. You can lead your life to where you want it to be…it all comes down to the choices you make.
Make a list of 10 things that are most important to you (included people and values). How do you make sure you prioritize these ten things and give time to each? Beside each one, list ways you can make sure each item becomes a part of your life. Example: if your parents are important to you, make sure you spend 5 minutes a day just schmoozing with your mom/dad.
Find one object in your house that makes you proud to be Jewish. Ask your parent if you can keep that object in your room as a constant reminder of why you appreciate your Jewish self.