Culture Club
Am I a traitor—or open minded?
TAIRYS CAMACHO
I never knew the stereotypes associated with Dominicans until I started junior high school in New York. When I actually lived in the Dominican Republic, up to the age of 10, Dominicans were just people. Some enjoyed playing dominos with their friends every afternoon; there were others who loved to go to the baseball field and have a good time, or to sit on their porch and gossip with their friends. But here I realized that we are all categorized as loud party animals, crazy and careless.
I noticed that a lot of the Dominican kids in school did fit the stereotype. They were free spirits, saying what they wanted out loud, dancing to any musical rhythm anytime, anywhere. I don’t know if they were trying to live up to the popular image of Dominicans, or whether they were truly born this way. But it bothered me that I was expected to behave like this. The image people have of Dominicans is totally not who I am; I would describe myself as passive, quiet, and reserved.
When I realized I didn’t fit the Dominican stereotype, I felt happy that I was different, but also sad to be an outsider. I didn’t want to be the outcast among my Dominican friends. I began to search for my identity in other cultures.
Outsiders
Dominican stereotypes made me feel out of place, so I tried to find my place somewhere else. Since a lot of Dominican kids fit the Dominican stereotype, I wondered if a lot of Asian kids would fit the Asian stereotype of being smart and quiet. I wished I could get to know more Asians and find out.
Around the same time, I became fascinated with Asian culture after getting to know my aunt’s foster child, who was of Chinese background. Her name was Grace, and she was disabled: she could not talk clearly or walk on her own. I fell in love with her and every time I visited my aunt I would buy Grace her favorite chocolate-covered cookies and take her for a walk.
I loved Grace partly because I could see myself in her. She would get mad if anyone called her Chinese; she would say she was Dominican, not Chinese. I knew she felt like an outsider in our family, just like I felt like an outsider among my friends.
My search for identity was going in the opposite direction from Grace’s. I began to study Asian cultures, languages, and ways of life, and I liked them all. I loved the bright clothing and amazing history of so many Asian cultures. The culture I mainly concentrated on was Japanese. I loved how colorful their modern world is, especially their fashion and paintings. I loved their amazing traditional values, their holidays, stories, foods, and beliefs.
Asian High?
In my middle school, there was only one Asian student. I never got to know her because she was a few years ahead of me. But when it came time to choose a high school, I made sure that I chose schools with significant populations of Asian students. I didn’t want just to read about Asians; I wanted to hear their personal stories and get closer to experiencing their culture myself.
The school that caught my attention was Brooklyn Tech, which had many Asian students. It didn’t have a lot of Hispanic students, but that was fine with me: I wanted to be in a school with fewer Spanish-speaking kids because I wanted to explore much more than where I come from.
Unfortunately, I wasn’t accepted to Brooklyn Tech. But I did get in to my second choice, Brooklyn International, and there were quite a few Asian students there, too. BIHS is a non-traditional high school for students who were not born or raised in the United States. There are students from almost every part of the world; at BIHS we are encouraged to learn English while not forgetting our native languages.
The school’s way of encouraging both cultural identity and cultural exchange turned out to be great. It made me feel proud of being Dominican. Just as I learned from other students’ cultures and countries, I wanted them to know about my country and culture.
Crossing Barriers
image by YC-Art Dept
In the first weeks of school they encouraged us to learn about our classmates, so we had to do a lot of work with partners. I remember a day in English class where the assignment was to go around the room and find a student with a certain characteristic—for example, you had to find person with the longest hair or the person with the greatest number of siblings.
That was my first interaction with students from all over the world. At first I talked only to Spanish-speaking people. True, I was eager to mix with people from different cultures, but dreaming of something is different from actually having the chance to do it. I was hesitant because of the language barrier; I was afraid others would prefer to talk to people who spoke the same language as them.
But later I gained enough courage to approach non-Spanish-speaking people. The first step I took was to sit at a table where there were no Hispanic kids. From there I began talking to students from Africa, Egypt, Tibet, and China, working together with them on group projects, and hanging out during lunch.
At BIHS I found diversity. Gradually I realized that I could be in any group; I didn’t have to belong to or fit into one. I made friends with Africans, Arab students, Tibetans, and other Spanish-speaking students. I loved learning from other cultures and I got along with everyone very well. The bonds of culture are still strong at my school; most times, kids sit with people from their own background during lunch, and even I sometimes ended up doing this, despite my interest in other cultures. But luckily I had other non-Spanish-speaking friends who sat with us too.
In class I made sure to sit with the non-Spanish students, and there I learned a lot, like how to say “Hello” in many different languages. I also learned about Muslim religious traditions, including their religious book, called the Quran, and their one-month period of fasting, called Ramadan. But learning about the Far East remained my favorite. I’ve learned, for example, that at New Year’s Chinese children receive red envelopes with money from adults; how Tibetans do not consider themselves part of China; and about the Dalai Lama.
‘Vende Patria’
Even now, people—Hispanic and non-Hispanic—sometimes ask me why I’m so different from other Dominicans, and why I like hanging out with Asians. They ask this with curiosity because they have never seen a Hispanic girl like me. I never know how to answer so I always say that I don’t know. Generally this does not bother me; instead it makes me happy because people are noticing that I’m different from other Dominicans.
But occasionally people have said hurtful things. One day before class, some of my friends and I were sitting in a classroom talking. I don’t remember what we were discussing, but I sure remember what one of my friends said: “Tueresunavende patria,” he told me in a joking tone.
“Oh,” I said, laughing. I laughed to brush it off. I did not even know what “vende patria” meant, and I was afraid to ask because I sensed it was a word I was supposed to know as a “real Dominican.” My other friends ignored the bizarre comment and kept talking, but I kept wondering about it. I knew “vende” means to sell and “patria” means your nationality. The phrase didn’t make sense to me, but I had my suspicions that it wasn’t something nice.
When I got home that day I searched for the phrase on Google. I found the definition: It meant a traitor to one’s country. I haven’t done anything treacherous. I think my friend said it because he has a strong pride in being Dominican, while he doesn’t see me having the same pride.
My Own Unique Culture
It bothered me to see how closed-minded people can be, only wanting to see what’s inside their culture and country instead of wanting to explore the world, to find or do something new. But I let it go because I do want to be separated from Dominican stereotypes. I want people to see me as me, not as just another Dominican girl.
I don’t feel like a traitor. I’m just following my interests, which are different from those of highly nationalistic people. There are still plenty of things I love about being Dominican, like the Carnivals in celebration of independence, and eatinghabichuela con dulce, a traditional Dominican dessert of sweet creamed beans, at Easter. Loving another culture does not mean you love your own culture any less; instead it makes you appreciate your own culture more, because you understand what makes it unique.
Sometimes when I feel a love for Asian cultures that I don’t have for my own, I feel guilty. But I still respect and appreciate my culture and national history.
I want to create my own culture, one that is made up of flavors and colors from all around the world—all the things I love and am interested in. There may be disadvantages to not fitting in with a large group, but the big advantage is getting along with so many different people and enjoying parts of different cultures every day.