Meeting at Grace in the Mountains

We recognize that we are in the presence of the Holy Spirit, and the Holy Spirit “working in us, can do infinitely more than we can ask or imagine.” Ephesians 3:20.
We acknowledge that conflict is a normal part of the life of the Church, and we can work through it with God’s help. Romans 14: 1-8, 17:

Welcome those who are weak in faith, but not for the purpose of quarreling over opinions. Some believe in eating anything, while the weak eat only vegetables. Those who eat must not despise those who abstain, and those who abstain must not pass judgment on those who eat; for God has welcomed them. Who are you to pass judgment on servants of another? It is before their own lord that they stand or fall. And they will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make them stand. Some judge one day to be better than another, while others judge all days to be alike. Let all be fully convinced in their own minds. Those who observe the day, observe it in honor of the Lord. Also those who eat, eat in honor of the Lord, since they give thanks to God; while those who abstain, abstain in honor of the Lord and give thanks to God. We do not live to ourselves, and we do not die to ourselves. If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord; so then, whether we live or whether we die, we are the Lord’s. . . . For the kingdom of God is not food and drink but righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.

We agree that everyone in the room is sincere and cares deeply for the parish. We will assume goodwill and practice forgiveness. Ephesians 4:32: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” Col. 12-13: “Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassion, kindness, loneliness, meekness, and patience, forbearing one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.”
We will speak the truth in love. This means that we will have the courage to say what we believe to be true, but we will abstain from sarcasm, insults, raised voices, etc. See Ephesians 4:15-16, 29, 31: “Speaking the truth in love, we must grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by every ligament with which it is equipped, as each part is working properly, promotes the body’s growth in building itself up in love. . . . Let no evil talk come out of your mouths, but only what is useful for building up, as there is need, so that your words may give grace to those who hear. . . . Put away from you all bitterness and wrath; Proverbs 15:1: “A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
We will recognize the possibility that no one of us has the whole truth and understanding. Romans 2:1: “Therefore you have no excuse, O man, every one of you who judges. For in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, practice the very same things.”
We will demonstrate respect for one another.See the Baptismal Covenant: “Will you strive for justice and peace among all people, and respect the dignity of every human being? I will, with God’s help.”
We will actively, carefully, and respectfully listen to one another, attending to the emotions as well as the substance of what is said. James 1:19: “Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger.” Proverbs 12:15: “The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice.” Proverbs 18:13: “If one gives an answer before he hears, it is his folly and shame.”
We will speak only for ourselves. We will not repeat what others have told us about conversations to which we were not a party. See Proverbs 16:28: “A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends.”
James 3:3-8:

If we put bits into the mouths of horses so that they obey us, we guide their whole bodies as well. Look at the ships also: though they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are guided by a very small rudder wherever the will of the pilot directs. So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell. For every kind of beast and bird, of reptile and sea creature, can be tamed and has been tamed by mankind, but no human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.

Matthew 18:15-17:

If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over. But if he will not listen, take one or two others along, so that 'every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.' If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, treat him as you would a pagan or a tax collector. [And remember how Jesus treated pagans and tax collectors in Matthew’s Gospel!]

We will be willing to be vulnerable (showing weakness and the other person’s ability to hurt us) and to make sacrifices (such as being willing to admit when we need to change and being willing to change). Luke 6:31: “And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.” (See also, Mt. 7:12.) Matthew 22:39: “And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
We will be responsible for our own actions, regardless of how others might have related to us or treated us. We will not mirror behavior we find objectionable. Rom. 12:14, 17: “Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse them. . . . Repay no one evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of all.” Mt. 5:43-45: “Jesus says,“But I say to you, love your enemy andpray for those who persecute you, so that you may be likeyour Father in heaven, since he causes the sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.”
We don’t have to agree on everything we discuss in order to be able to work, play, and pray together for the good of the church.John 13:35: “By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
We will strive to get to a place where we can encourage one another for the good of our Church and the Kingdom of God. Each of us is empowered to gently, lovingly encourage others follow these norms. 1 Thess. 5:10-12: “He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him. Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” Hebrews 10:23-25:“Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds. Let us not
give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another. . . .”