On April 17, 1945, my mother gave birth to her first-born son, Harold Paul Phillips. Harold was the third of nine children born to Marjorie Phillips and the late Rev. Felie Phillips of Empire. Harold grew up to marry his sweetheart Brenda Manasco of Cordova, Alabama and they had four children. Now I am the eighth child of our family and Harold was 16 years old when I was born. My memories of Harold are from later on his life when his children came along. I am only five years older than his oldest daughter.
My older sisters have told me stories about him when they were growing up together. He was a typical boy, always harassing his sisters and being mean to them, like most brothers are at some point and time. Just typical sibling rivalry. My older sister Linda told me that one time they were having an Easter Egg Hunt with some of my older cousins and Harold found the most eggs. I don’t know how most people did when they had egg hunts at Easter, but this is how we did it. After all the eggs were found, we would count them and then divide them among all of the children there so everyone would have an equal amount. But Harold had another plan this year. He grabbed his basket of eggs and took off across the yard and jumped the fence with his eggs. He wasn’t going to share his eggs with anyone. He found them and they belonged to him. I think after my Daddy finally caught up with him, he changed his mind.
My mother told me that Harold was a good student. He always made A’s and B’s and never opened a book. He didn’t go to college after he graduated High School. He got a job, got married and started his family. Hard work is all he ever knew. He grew up watching our Daddy work hard and that is what he did. Years down the road, Harold started singing in Gospel Quartets in the 70’s and would continue to sing for several years. After several years, the group split up and they all went their separate ways.
In 1978, tragedy struck Harold and Brenda and our whole family. Their third child and second son, Dennis drown while on vacation in Gulf Shores, Alabama. He was 8 years old. Their live as they knew it was over. It was so hard on them and the other children as well. They had lost a brother whom they were so close to. Harold and his wife Brenda would never be the same again. Dennis’ death was so tragic. Then in 1980, two years to the day that his son died, our Daddy passed away suddenly from an apparent heart attack at the age of 64. The good Lord says that he won’t put no more on us than we can bear, but He definitely gave us our share when this happened. Harold was the oldest boy and he was right there for us all. I was engaged to be married in August and my daddy died in June. I think God has a way of preparing Christian people for their deaths and I honestly think that my daddy knew he was going to die. The day before he died, he came to my bedroom and told me that I was to get Harold to give me away at my wedding. I was so upset because I didn’t think that my daddy was going to be there for me. He told me that he wasn’t going to be here and that Harold was the oldest and he wanted me to ask him to give me away. That night, my daddy died. Harold stepped up and fulfilled my daddy’s wishes. He walked me down the isle and gave me away. It was a very emotional time for me since I was the youngest girl and every girl dreams of her daddy giving her away. Harold was always there for us and our Mother after daddy passed away.
Harold was a huge Alabama Football Fan. He wore Alabama shirts and hats everywhere he went and he never missed a game, whether it was on television or he went to the game. He had a collection of Alabama memorabilia. Harold, his son Paul and my brother’s use to watch the games together and they would always have a great time.
In early May, 1993, Harold started having some health problems. He was hospitalized several times from May until October. The doctors couldn’t find out what was wrong with him. They decided that after months of being sick and not really getting any better, they sent him to see a doctor at Carraway Hospital in Birmingham where he was diagnosed with a kidney disease. Harold passed away a few days later at the age of 48.
Harold loved his wife, children, and grandchildren more than life itself. His family was everything to him. He was married to his sweetheart Brenda for only 29 short years. I know that they were the best years of his life and hers too. His children and grandchildren were the apples of his eyes. He didn’t live to see two of his grandchildren who were born after he died, but I think he was right there when they came into this world. Not physically, but spiritually.
Harold set an example for us in the life he lived. He didn’t go to college, get a degree, or become very well known for anything, but he was a son, a brother, a husband, a father and a grandfather. He was the most loving man I have ever known. I will never forget his smile. Our family hasn’t been the same since he died, but we are all blessed to have had Harold in our lives.
Today, October 16, 2003, marks the 10th anniversary of his death. I’m not celebrating his death today, just his life and how he lived it. Harold was a remarkable man to me and my brothers and sisters and all who knew him. I miss him so much. I know if he could talk to us now, he’d say, “Wish you were here, it’s such a beautiful place. Wish you were here, nothing but clear sunny days. It never rains and no one complains and we haven’t seen a tear. Daddy, Dennis and I are having a great time and we wish you were here”.
I love you brother and I can’t wait to see you, daddy and Dennis again.
Your sister,
Rebecca Phillips Wade
(Class of 79)