8th of Belsamer
TABLE OF CONTENTS
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3. The Lotus Blossom. Editorial. Kamala Sunyatta, the UC’s prima donna, sounds off.
5. The Stoa- Voice of the People. A free-for-all. The common people express their point of view.
6. Recent Events: What’s happening, and rumors of what’s happening, in Azolin.
8. Tempo: Interview with Nilos Rodis: A venerable sage talks about recent events.
11. The Girls of Uvatha. The results of the first Ms. Uvatha Conservatory beauty and talent contest.
15. Insight: Professor Whelan of Saragun’s Alcheminary is on drugs.
19. Classifieds
Editor: Kamala Sunyatta
Managing Editor: Kamala Sunyatta
Art Director: Karina Subodai
Production Director: Kamala Sunyatta
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The Lotus Blossom
Well, here we are again with another issue of The Scroll- and there is a lot to talk about. First, our readers will notice that we have a new format. I can’t say that we’ve decided which format to stay with on a permanent basis, so expect changes as we move along. The most disturbing and dominating event in the headlines is the turmoil at Glensea. The nobles, mages and merchants are out and the undead are in- at least that’s the rumor. Hillstride soldiers are patrolling the countryside and Veur Minith is Lord of Glensea. What should we make of this? How did this come to pass? Where are our leaders? Where is Marulama? I am told that I met Veur Minith once and that I should be glad that I’m not in Glensea. Some of our readers differ on this matter. Check out the Stoaand the Recent Events for more information.
On the lighter side, we have a wonderful interview with Nilos Rodis. Read on and see what the Elder Sage of the UC says about current events. Prof. Whelan of Saragun’s Alcheminary treats us to drugs.
The results of UC’s beauty and talent competition are in and the GIRLS OF UVATHA are here! Sorry guys, but yours truly declined the opportunity to participate. If I am going to exploit myself (which I used to do), I am certainly going to get paid for it- and handsomely at that. I am not going to pose gratis so a bunch of magically inclined idiot savants can get their bent little wands straightened. Besides, if some of our faculty got a look at this Editor-in-Chief in her hot little silk skiff, we’d need a cadre of clerics to resurrect the old geezers from the dead (Sorry Nilos ).
Well, dig in and let us know how you liked this issue. K.S., Editor-in-Chief
Come on down to Uncle Al-Azibo’s Magic Emporium for our Winter Virgin Sale!!!! You heard right. It’s oursecond sale of virgins this year. All of the early Spring Virgins sold out, but Uncle Al-Azibo has come through for his customers. These virgins are 100% pure magical-gradevirgins. These lassies will meet any of your conjuring needs. They are checked and double-checked and ASScertified (Azolin Sorcerer’s Society). Surprise ole Beelzebub with one of these honeys and he’ll be forever grateful. Don’t accept cheap imitations from disreputable bazaar merchants- your life and soul may depend on the purity of your virgin. Trust Uncle Al-Azibo! Get’em while supplies last.
Refurbished Virgins. Uncle Al-Azibo sells refurbished virgins too. We’ve found a supplier of refurbished virgins from the Eastern Kingdoms that produces a great product. No, you can’t use them in magic rituals, but they can be used for just about anything else a virgin is good for. Most people can’t tell the difference. Uncle Al-Azibo will buy back your used virgins too or give you trade-in value when you purchase a “fresh” model. Uncle Al-Azibo cannot accept virgins who have consorted with demons-there are just some things you cannot fix.
Uncle Al-Azibo’s Magic Emporium, 1122 Dragon Way, Hillstride.
*Disclaimer: the alleged virgins appearing in this advertisement may not represent the quality or appearance of any actual virgins, fresh or refurbished, sold at Uncle Al-Azibo’S Magic Emporium. Come on, there’s a reason why they’re virgins!
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THE
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My Home
The little woman and I are very angry about losing our home outside Glensea. We fled because the countryside is full of zombies and skeleton minions of Veur Minith. Where is justice? When can we go home?
-Lil’ Jack
Envious Worms
I would like to respond to the general negative attitude of the Scroll’s editorial staff towards Veur Minith and the deliberate promulgation of misinformation about Lord Minith by the Scroll. The Scroll is not acting as an objective voice but is the talking piece for Nilos Rodis and his toadies, the faculty at the Uvatha Conservatory. These so-called sages, mages and mystics envy the knowledge and power possessed by Veur Minith. They can’t stand the fact that Veur Minith is Lord of Glensea, and soon to be Lord of all of Averlee, while they are nothing more than bookworms who wish they could be wizards. As the elves say, “Lasta lalaithamin!” The only real magical minds at the Uvatha are Balaam Ku and Trition Kaidon. These wizards should lead the conservatory.
-Lydios the Blind
Whore
Whore!
-Anonymous
[Ed. Note: For those who may not be familiar with my past, I used to be a courtesan- a particularly beautiful and “talented” courtesan, but a courtesan all the same. I have repented and changed my ways, and I am now a nun. I live to serve others and refuse to be exploited or allow others to be exploited. K.S.]
Law, Justice and Order
Wier graytful to Voor Minnith for al that he haz dun for us. He haz drivn oph our opressors and givn us bak our land. Hail Voor Minith.
-Bram the Blacksmith, Glensea
Fools!
While not surprised, I am beside myself at the willingness of the “hoi polloi” to buy into Veur Minith’s propaganda. The very idea that Lord Minith is looking out for the poor and oppressed is nonsense. Yes, he’s expelled the gentry and political leaders from Glensea, with the apparent support of most of the population, and he is reportedly returning land to the peasants and tradesmen. However, this doesn’t make his actions right. He’s a demagogue! He’s evil. We must take back Glensea.
-Fritz Coppersmith
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RECENT EVENTS
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TRAGEDY AT GLENSEA!
(Dateline: Glensea)
Reports are coming in that Veur Minith has taken over Glensea. All of Averlee is in chaos. Never before has such a thing happened to the good people of Averlee. It is unclear just what has happened. One report is that Veur Minith and his legions of undead warriors invaded Glensea in the night and massacred hundreds of innocent people. “That dark evil bastard killed half of the militia, raped the women and sacrificed scores of children to his dark god,” reported Squire Geoffrey, one the displaced merchants and town fathers of Glensea. He added, “This monster must be stopped!”
“This is all stuff and nonsense, propaganda of the ‘town fathers’ and ‘political rapists’, criminals if you ask me,” said Count Milos Sylvani, spokesman for Lord Minith. “Lord Minith was installed by the good and law abiding people of Glensea,” he added, “in a lawful manner.” “The enemies of freedom are spreading lies!” “Show me the violence! Show me where anyone was killed, where anyone was raped!” In a loud cry he added, “Your oppressors have been deposed and they cry for their ill-gotten property!” The crowd of peasants began to chant in praise of Lord Minith. While it appeared that Count Sylvani might have organized the rally, this reporter saw no evidence of violence or dead bodies. The only show of force is the Hillstride patrols in the countryside.
Clearly there are at least two different perspectives on this apparent coup. Can we believe the claims of the dispossessed nobility and landed gentry that Veur Minith took Glensea by force? Or is it true that the people of Glensea have overthrown their feudal masters and are living willingly under the protectorate of Veur Minith?
Brother Williams, the Sage of Religion at the Uvatha Conservatory, stated, “We must look to the source when we weigh the credibility of the reporters and the veracity of their statements.” He added, “I know that this will anger some of my colleagues, but I cannot help but conclude that our lack of restrictions on necromancy have led to this problem. I have opposed the free and unrestricted use of necromancy for years because it presents a number of moral problems. Now we are faced with something beyond our ken- the town of Glensea under the control of an undead lord!” In a lamenting tone, he added, “I wish I knew where the mage, Balaam Ku, stands on this. He is Veur’s protégé. I hoped that he had turned from away from this darkness, but neither he nor his companions are anywhere to be seen. Could it be that such an illustrious mage supports Veur Minith?
Improved weaponry
Aura Shesslytyr – Professor of Dusts, Powders, Chymicals & Compounds at Saragun’s Alcheminary, reports a major new improvement in warfare. Prof. Shesslytyr reports that he has improved uponthe propellant powder used by Dwarves in their explosive siege engines. The Dwarvenpowder is highly hydroscopic, and high humidity or outright rain decreases its reliability. Prof. Shesslytyr’s new method of combining the compounds decreases the compound’s hydroscopic nature thereby making the powder more reliable. No longer will rain delay a Dwarven siege!
Knights of Azolin
(Dateline: Umma Pergammom)
There are unconfirmed reports of the arrival of several Knights of Azolin at Amsha Essafah, Tal Nega and Kah Aziza. No one knows the reason for the arrival, or the ultimate destination, of these noble knights.
Ancient Reliquary Found
(Dateline: Bournegrove)
It is reported that an ancient reliquary has been found in the Bourne-grove Woods. It is described as a small bronze box with steel bands holding the top and bottom together. Several persons have tried to open the box but it seems impregnable. One scholar suggests and that the reliquary pre-dates recorded time. “The engravings and relief consist, in part, of an unknown language, “ said the local bard. Ettencius Gonon of the Uvatha Conservatory has been sent to investigate the find in order to determine its authenticity. Master Gonon gave a brief statement, “These old artifacts can be very dangerous. We often make false assumptions about their function and, in this case, contents.” He added, “This container could contain a long-dead plague, an important historical scroll, a banished demon or just plain dust…you never know.”
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TEMPO
This issue of the Scroll is extra special. Nilos Rodis, Sage of Records at the Uvatha Conservatory, has granted us an interview. Originally, this interview was meant to simply be an exploration of the UC and Prof. Rodis’ vision for the future. About the time of the interview, however, the events at Glensea took place. The portions of the interview addressing the recent events have been excerpted. The full interview may run at a later date.
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K.S.: Professor, would you please comment on the recent events at Glensea?
N.R.: Well, I am hesitant to say too much. A great deal has been said about the UC and me in the press lately, and I’m afraid that anything I say may cause more of a problem. We’re being painted as enemies of Veur Minith, and that may be an overstatement.
K.S.: Surely, Professor, you must be opposed to the rise of Veur Minith to the lordship of Glensea?
N.R.: Of course, I…well…
K.S.: Professor…?
N.R.: I am partially to blame for this mess. I didn’t listen to my colleagues when they
tried to restrict the practice of necromancy. Brother Williams appears to have been right.
K.S: What do you mean, Professor? You can’t believe that the exploration of necromancy and the teaching of necrology at the UC contributed to Veur Minith’s rise to power- do you?
N.R.: My dear, Kamala, the UC is not a fortified island. What we do there affects a great number of people. While we certainly did not assist Veur Minith in achieving power, our tacit approval of necromancy lent an air of legitimacy to his sphere of practice. This is so hard for me to say. I trusted Balaam Ku. He assured me that necromancy did not deserve its dark reputation. I was, alas, naïve.
K.S.: Professor, you don’t believe that Balaam Ku has assisted Veur Minith in his rise to power, do you?
N.R.: Well, I don’t believe Balaam intentionally assisted Lord Minith. Early on, yes, Balaam was enamored with his mentor and sought the full dark knowledge that Lord Minith possessed. Balaam was convinced that necromancy could be used for good, and I do not doubt there is some truth in this position. As I understood it, Balaam repudiated many of the practices of his old mentor and terminated their relationship. Be that as it may, Balaam’s early assistance of Veur Minith contributed to his rise to power, and it is known that Veur obtained the dark necromantic tome in his possession with Balaam’s help.
K.S.: Professor, many are saying the Veur has done nothing wrong at all. He’s being held up as a champion of the people and only the greedy and formerly powerful oppose him. What do you make of this?
N.R.: It is probably true that the lords of Glensea were not always the most benign of overlords. Veur has apparently capitalized on the social unrest and used his power and influence to move the majority of the population of Glensea over to him. This is, at least, as appearances would have it.
K.S. If this is true, what can be done?
N.R.: If true, very little can be done. Veur is powerful. His only real weakness was his lack of acceptance by the commoner because he’s a vampire and because of his necromancy. If he has overcome these obstacles, he might be untouchable. If efforts are made to depose Veur, and the will of the people of Glensea are against the would-be-freedom-fighters, then there is no telling how much more powerful such a venture, if failed, could make Veur. If, on the other hand, what we hear is merely Lord Minith’s propaganda, them immediate action must be taken.
K.S.: Why?
N.R.: Veur is obviously up to something and the dark Tome in his possession magnifies his powers greatly. If he has indeed slaughtered hundreds or thousands of the inhabitants of Glensea, he could, in theory, raise an undead army that would be capable of dominating all of Averlee within a relatively short period of time. While we sit, murders continue. While we tarry, darkness becomes ever so darker and the fate of Averlee, perhaps even Azolin, becomes more uncertain. A preemptive strike is required for our safety.
K.S.: In summary then, Professor, a misstep in either direction could lead to disaster.
N.R.: Exactly. There are but a few men, ahem…and women, with the capabilities and courage to face Veur Minith. The group I’m thinking of is courageous and capable. Alas, however, there is a hitch. Balaam Ku is part of the group. What if Veur’s successes have convinced Balaam that his old master was right and it leads him to join Lord Minith? If this should happen, we are doomed.
K.S.: Thank you, Professor. I think that is all the time we have for today.
N.R: Thank you, Kamala.
K.S.: Hey! Professor, don’t touch my leg like that!
N.R.: Why? It’s a very nice leg.
K.S.: Well for one, you’re newly married, and your “latest” wife appears in the Scroll as one of the Girls of Uvatha. What would she think?
N.R.: Well, we have an open marriage, like I had with the “old bat” before my current wife.
K.S.: Old bat?! How can you talk about your deceased wife like that? You ought to be ashamed!
N.R.: No, no, no…you misunderstand me. She was a bat. A magical experiment went horribly wrong and she was turned into a bat. She never got better. Well, that takes care of your first objection. What other concern do you have?
K.S.: Well, even if you have an “open relationship”, I would recommend keeping your lecherous little hands to yourself, unless you want a private demonstration of just what a properly cast Bigsby’s Bitch Slap spell can do.
N.R.: Oh my… I should be going.
K.S.: Thank you, Professor.
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It is time for the results of the Ms. Uvatha competition. This was a competition to determine which female represents the values of the UC. Contestants were examined for magical talent, arcane knowledge and appearance. Since there are so few females at the UC, we allowed both students and faculty to participate. We also allowed participants who are members of registered covens even though they are not directly affiliated with the UC. Sit back and review the finalist and then we’ll disclose the identity of Ms. Uvatha.
Meet our fourth runner up, Nahemah. She’s a succubus from the hoary netherworlds. She’s a graduate student at the UC and studies illusions and song magic.