When in Doubt, Kiss the Fish — And Other Extremely Wise Advice

by John Kremerand Friends

People will accept your ideas much more readily if you tell them Benjamin Franklin said it first. — David H. Comins

When in doubt, quote Franklin. — anonymous

Copyright © 2007 by John Kremer
All rights reserved.

Illustrations by Phil Frank
Copyright © 1993 by Creative Media Services

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Web: http://www.waybackwords.com

A

The beginning of wisdom is found in doubting; by doubting we come to the question, and by seeking we may come upon the truth. — Pierre Abelard, priest

If you had any doubt about that, Lady Elaine, you might have asked. After all, you have words and that's what words are for, aren't they? — Lady Betty Aberlin

When in doubt, kiss the fish. — Jonathan Adolph

He who believes is strong; he who doubts is weak. Strong convictions precede great actions. — Louisa May Alcott, novelist

Laugh at yourself, but don't ever aim your doubt at yourself. Be bold. When you embark for strange places, don't leave any of yourself safely on shore. Have the nerve to go into unexplored territory. — Alan Alda, actor

When in doubt, don't. — Lamar Alexander, Lamar Alexander's Little Plaid Book

When in doubt, abstain. — Alexei Alexandrovich, character in Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy

When in doubt, close your eyes. Think of England. — Amos, Israeli agent in The Assignment movie

When in doubt, act like a gorilla. — Antoine, director character in Early Edition TV show

When in doubt, make like Donald Trump. — Jennifer Armstrong, Entertainment Weekly

If you doubt yourself, wear something else. — AussieBum magazine advertisement

B

If a man will begin with certainties, he shall end in doubts; but if he will be content to begin with doubts he shall end in certainties. — Francis Bacon, philosopher

Who never doubted, never half believed. Where doubt is, there truth is—it is her shadow. — Philip James Bailey, poet

When in doubt, you can always consult. — Ryan Bakken, journalist

Weary the path that does not challenge. Doubt is an incentive to truth and patient inquiry leadeth the way. — Hosea Ballou, preacher

In necessary things, unity; in doubtful things, liberty; in all things, charity. — Richard Baxter, Puritan

When in doubt, leave it at home. — Michael Becraft

When you’re up to your nose in shit, keep your mouth shut. — Jack Beauregard, character in My Name Is Nobody movie

When in doubt, peel out. — Alex Blagg, blogger, Blogg Blogg

If the Sun and Moon should ever doubt, they’d immediately go out. — William Blake, poet and artist

When in doubt, wear red. — Bill Blass, fashion designer

Guidelines for bureaucrats: 1) When in charge, ponder. 2) When in trouble, delegate. 3) When in doubt, mumble. — James H. Boren

Doubt whom you will, but never yourself. — Christine Bovee

I have a rule that has served me well in life. When in doubt, do nothing. If you're not sure, don't buy it, don't comment, don't commit. Sit tight. — Tempe Brennan, forensic anthropologist in Kathy Reich's Deja Dead

Remember, when in doubt, you should never do what you truly want to do. — Nathan Bronfman, character in Human Nature movie

When in doubt, cut to the skyline. — Jamie Buchman, character in Mad About You TV show (reading a fortune cookie)

There is nothing more dreadful than the habit of doubt. Doubt separates people. It is a poison that disintegrates friendships and breaks up pleasant relations. It is a thorn that irritates and hurts; it is a sword that kills. — Buddha, founder of Buddhism

Never despair, but if you do, work on in despair. — Edmund Burke, British statesman

When in doubt, DO something. If it turns out to be wrong, correct it. But you will never know until you do it. — Ivan Burnell, author

C

When in doubt, end with a quote. — Michael Cader, book producer

When all else fails, read the instructions. — Cahn's Axiom

If you are ever in doubt as to whether to kiss a pretty girl, always give her the benefit of the doubt. — Thomas Carlyle, philosopher

When in doubt, just cook it. — Mary Carmichael

Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy. — Dale Carnegie, motivational author

When in doubt, my dears, take an extreme case. — Lewis Carroll, author

Remember, when in doubt, throw it to Carter! — Chris Carter, football receiver

When in doubt, eat. — Lisa Cates, character in August Fires movie

When in doubt, have somebody enter the room with a gun. — Raymond Chandler, detective novelist

When in doubt, have two guys come through the door with guns. — Raymond Chandler, detective novelist

When in doubt, suggest that a subcommittee be appointed. — Harry Chapman

Whenever you have doubts about something, communicate! Talk, talk, talk until the problem resolves. When you feel stress, disagreement or resistance between you and someone near you, the wrong thing to do is ignore the problem. Instead, start communicating. — Mike Chatelain, author, TipsForSuccess.org

If you listen, one day you might be heard. And when in doubt, use the smell test. — Maurice Chavez, character in Grand Theft Auto: Vice City video game

The men who really believe in themselves are all in lunatic asylums. — Gilbert Keith Chesterton, novelist, Orthodoxy

Great doubts, deep wisdom. Small doubts, little wisdom. — Chinese proverb

When in doubt, buy your man a cordless drill. It does not matter if he already has one. I have a friend who owns 17 and he has yet to complain. As a man, you can never have too many cordless drills. No one knows why. — Christmas Gift Ideas for Men

Nearly all societies have the instinct is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, they finish by loading honors on your head. — Winston Churchill, British prime minister

By doubting we come to truth. — Cicero, philosopher and orator

When in doubt, lie your head off. — Brian Cloughley, journalist, CounterPunch

If all else fails, issue an ultimatum. — married husband with child, Cold Feet TV show

When in doubt, just say, “But how do you feel about that?” — Tess Coleman, character in Freaky Friday movie

When you have nothing to say, say nothing. — Charles Caleb Colton, author

Doubt is the vestibule which all must pass before they can enter the temple of wisdom. When we are in doubt and puzzle out the truth by our own exertions, we have gained something that will stay by us and will serve us again. But if to avoid the trouble of the search we avail ourselves of the superior information of a friend, such knowledge will not remain with us; we have not bought, but borrowed it. — Charles Caleb Colton, author

When in doubt, delete it. — Philip Cosby

When in doubt, check him out. — Joseph Culligan, book title

When in doubt, sling effort at it. — George W. Cummings, Sr.

When in doubt, mull. — Mario Cuomo, governor

D

Just think of the tragedy of teaching children not to doubt. — Clarence Darrow, attorney

If you would be a real seeker after truth, it is necessary that at least once in your life you doubt, as far as possible, all things. — Rene Descartes, philosopher

The first precept was never to accept a thing as true until I knew it as such without a single doubt. — Rene Descartes

When in doubt, find another sponsor. When in trouble, hire a wrangler. Because there’s never enough time. And there never will be. — Hilary De Vries, entertainment journalist, The Gift Bag Chronicles

When you don't know what to do, walk fast and look worried. — Dilbert's Laws of Work

When in doubt, do as the Romans do. — Hugh D. Dillehay

When in doubt, give a book. — Discount Portland Guide

In my book, if you fail at donuts, you’ve failed at life. — donut manager, character in Madonna: Innocence Lost TV movie

When in doubt, I’ve found retracing your steps a wise place to begin. — Albus Dumbledore, character in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban movie

E

If in doubt, farm it out. — The Economist magazine headline

Two people only hurt each other if they doubt the love they have for one another. — Tom Edison, character in Dogville movie

Real love is more than a physical feeling. If there's even the slightest doubt in your head about a guy, then forget about it. It's not real. — Ethan Embry

Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in, forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day, you shall begin it well and serenely. — Ralph Waldo Emerson, essayist

When in doubt, ask your tailor. — Esquire magazine’s The New Laws of Fashion

Freedom of speech and freedom of action are meaningless without freedom to think. And there is no freedom of thought without doubt. — Bergen Evans, author, The Natural History of Nonsense

F

There is no harm in doubt and skepticism, for it is through these that new discoveries are made. — Richard Feynman, physicist

What every computer consultant needs to know: 1) In case of doubt, make it sound convincing. 2) Do not believe in miracles. Rely on them. — Finagle's Rules

When in doubt, don’t pitch it out. — football option rule

If you don't know what to do with many of the papers piled on your desk, stick a dozen colleagues' initials on 'em, and pass them along. When in doubt, route. — Malcolm Forbes, magazine publisher

When in doubt, duck. — Malcolm Forbes, magazine publisher

When in doubt, make a western. — John Ford, movie director

Lord, make me an instrument of your peace. Where there is hatred, let me sow love. Where there is injury, pardon. Where there is doubt, faith. Where there is despair, home, Where there is darkness, light. Where there is sadness, joy. — Saint Francis of Assisi, Prayer of St. Francis

When in doubt, don’t. — Ben Franklin, inventor, patriot, scientist, author, publisher, statesman

When in doubt, medicate. — Dr. Ian Frechette, character in Cupid TV show

When in doubt, destroy. Even if you go down with your captive. — J. E. Freedman, Above the Law

When in doubt, gallop! — proverb of the French Foreign Legion

When in doubt, just include those four letters we all love
to see in print—FREE. — Albert Fried-Cassorla

G

When in doubt, don’t think too much. Close your eyes, play, and have fun. — Dave Gage, author, Harmonica Lessons.com

When in doubt, get up off the chair and stand up for practicing and jamming to facilitate good breathing habits. Try to stand erect with your head up, back straight, and body relaxed. — Dave Gage, author, Harmonica Lessons.com

When in doubt, lick your lips. — Dave Gage, author, Harmonica Lessons.com

Doubt is the father of invention. — Galileo Galilei, astronomer

When in doubt, call a pro. — Jackie Gallogly, marketing technology officer, Inbox Interactive

If in doubt, always follow your nose. —Gandalf the wizard in The Fellowship of the Ring movie

When in doubt, do without. — Samuel ben Hofni Gaon, rabbi

When in doubt, apply booze. — Luke Garrison, character in novel, Above the Law by J. E. Freedman

When in doubt, don’t. — Saul Gellerman, academic

For the truly faithful, no miracle is necessary. For those who doubt, no miracle is sufficient. — Nancy Gibbs

Believe those who are seeking the truth. Doubt those who find it. — Andre Gidé, novelist and critic

If you must tell me your opinions, tell me what you believe in. I have plenty of doubts of my own. — Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, poet and essayist

We know accurately only when we know little; with knowledge doubt increases. — Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, poet and essayist

When in doubt, peddle disinformation. — Dave Goldberg, football writer

When in doubt, go defense. — Dave Goldberg, football writer

A mind troubled by doubt cannot focus on the course to victory. — Arthur Golden, novelist, Memoirs of a Geisha

It is a great thing to know exactly what to do in an emergency. When in doubt whether to attack or retreat, I never hesitate a moment. I toss a copper. — Gordon Granger, general

When in doubt, do more homework. — Andy Green

When in doubt, trust your instincts. — Andy Green

When in doubt, go with the little voice in your head. — Andy Green

When in doubt, ask what your mom would do. — Andy Green

When in doubt, ask what would a horse do in this situation. — Andy Green