COACHING: ACTIVITIES
Introduction
Coaching, or coaching leadership is a container term. Some managers think that coaching is a form of therapy, in which the personal history of the employee should be at the centre. Others think that you are a good coach if you hand out assignments in a friendly tone of voice.
Below, coaching leadership is interpreted as a communication technique used by a manager/senior/colleague to help a colleague achieve a number of set goals. This set of goals has been chosen or adopted by the person being coached. The problem holder is the coached person. The focus can be on the content of the issues (i.e. the coach must, above all, clarify the problems and supply information/expert knowledge with respect to content), and on the problem holder themself (i.e. they must help the coach to clear their inner (psychological) blocks).
The coach must prepare themselves on the specific character of a coaching conversation. Initially, the possible solutions for issues should not come from the coach. They should be prepared to let the conversation take unexpected turns, and should not use their own possibly higher hierarchical position in the organisation; or try to use it as little as possible.
Time plays an important facilitating role. At the beginning, the amount of time that is reserved for the conversation should be indicated. If necessary, make a new appointment, and possibly a 'homework assignment' for the coached person as well. Two half-hour conversations are more valuable than one of an hour and a half, since the coached person mainly works between the appointments and not during the appointment.
Preparation
The coaching manager should adopt an open and receptive attitude. Since it is likely that the coach and coached person have been working together for quite some time, perceptions of one another have undoubtedly arisen. The items below can help dispose these perceptions of their caricatural properties, in order to make open communication possible.
- Make a ‘core quadrant’ of the relevant employee, weigh the possible allergic reactions between their own core quadrant and that of the employee. Possible conclusion with respect to the pitfalls to be avoided, etc.
- Global determining of the most frequently used style of influence in the communication with the employee, and the effects that spring from it. Possible conclusion concerning the styles to be used.
- Assessment of the competence and involvement of the employee, emphatically focussed on the task(s) that the coaching is meant for. Possible conclusions.
Communication technique
Investigation shows that a variation in the questions that are asked helps the other person to put the issue or problem into a different perspective, so that new directions for solutions can be formulated. Four main categories are defined
Exploratory questions along different lines of approach (´probing´). Do not try to complete the questions by category, but alternate the questions between the different fields. For that matter, experience shows that the order below produces the least resistance at the beginning of a coaching conversation.
- procedural: asking for the past and the processes
-Since when has this played…?
-How did this come about?
-What previous steps have you taken?
-Where exactly did you get stuck?
-How frequently does this occur?
-Have you beed through this in previous working environments?
-At which moments does this occur?
Near the end of the conversation: procedural towards the future:
-What will be your next step?
-When will you come back to this?
- concerning content: what exactly is the problem?
-Can you define it in further detail?
-What is your problem actually?
-Have you got a description?
-Can you compare it to anything?
-Are you in fact describing the symptoms or the causes?
-What exactly are the impeding factors?
-Which factors play an indirect role?
-Which solutions have you thought up already?
-What would be the solution from the bottom of your heart?
-What are the critical moments?
-What can you undertake by yourself?
- psychological: how do you experience it?
-which feelings play a role?
-How do you physically experience it?
-Does it disturb your sleep?
-Do you take it with you when you go home?
-Are there any personal circumstances that play a role?
-Have you felt like this before, possibly: what did you do in that case?
-Do you currently react different than usual?
-Do you experience stress?
-Are you worried about your health?
-How long will you be able to go on like this?
- social: who is involved?
-Who are you dealing with in this?
-Who do you feel is pressurizing you most?
-Do other people have the same problem as you? What are they doing about it?
-What is your effect on others?
-Who else do you talk to about this?
-What are the effects on your private situation?
-Can it be discussed with the other people involved?
-What do you require from me?
Drama triangle
Avoid:
- solving the problems of / for the other person
- reproaching the other person with regard to the problems
- feeling powerless yourself
accusingly (angry) ´helping´ (taking over)
Victim (helpless)
This game can be played by 1, 2, 3 or more players. Endlessly. It will take a huge amount of effort and only knows losers.
Standard series of coaching questions
- formulate your problem in one sentence
- what do you want to have achieved by the end of this conversation?
- what are your long-term objectives?
- what is the sting of the current situation?
- who else is involved in this matter?
- who has the final responsibility for what happens?
- what have you done so far?
- the effects of that?
- which obstacles are still present?
- which aids are at your disposal?
- which question would be uncomfortable for you at this moment?
- why don’t you name a few possibilities that may solve the issue?
- which of these possibilities is the easiest one?
- which one is the hardest?
- which one will requires the most time?
- which one gives the most satisfaction?
- which one will bring you closest to your ultimate goal?
- what are you going to do next? When?
- what could sabotage your actions?
- how do you prevent that sabotage?
- what is your chance of success? (number between 0 and 10)