Life History Interview Karen Kennedy

I chose to interview my sister-in-laws mother Martha for my life history paper. She grew up on a small family farm in Irapuato, Guanajuato Mexico and came from a very poor and strong catholic family. This way of life is very different from the life I had growing up in a middle class, Mormon family from Sandy, Utah. I thought it would be interesting and meaningful to learn the background of my little brother’s in-laws to gain a better understanding of their culture and traditions.

During my interview with Martha I learned that family is a very important part of the Mexican culture. She grew up in a large immediate family of three brothers, five sisters and her parents. But in Mexican culture the family extends beyond just the immediate family, it also includes Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, and Grandparents. When her family would get together for a celebration it include upwards of fifty people that were considered “family” who would attend. In my life I remember our family celebrations would include my parents, my brothers and sometimes my Grandparents, but rarely would any family members outside the immediate family attend these activities. Every few years my family might have an extended family Christmas party, but that was all. Martha’s family would have celebrations/parties like this on a regular basis. Her Family was the most important thing in her life, so important she dropped out of school in the 6th grade so she could stay on the farm and work to help support her family. Any money made from the farm went to her parents; there was no allowance or receiving money for doing chores like many of the children in the United States receive. Having a child drop out of school at that young of an age to help with the family business is a very rare occurrence here in Utah, looking back at my generation it was unheard of. There are very specific gender roles within the family as well. The men are viewed as the “earners” or “bread winners” of the family and the women are expected to cook, clean, take care of the children and the home. The children in the Mexican culture are taught to respect their elders and do what they say. Martha stated that if she ever talked out of line with one of the adults she would be punished because it is viewed to be very disrespectful and unacceptable. To me this is something that has virtually disappeared in the American Culture, children now show little respect to their parents and elders, many of them are spoiled brats in my eyes. Even looking at the difference of my childhood and my little brothers childhood, he got away with talking back more than I ever did, I remember many instances of soap or cayenne pepper going in my mouth for talking back to my parents.

Food is something else that is at the center of the Mexican culture. Some of the standard Mexican dishes include tacos, burritos, enchiladas, rice and beans. But as you travel to different geographical areas in Mexico the dishes and ingredients will change much like it does throughout the United States. There are some foods that go hand in hand with certain celebrations and holidays. In Martha’s family homemade tamales is the traditional dish for Christmas dinner. Carne Asada is a traditional food for many of the summer holidays; they will turn the feast into what we would look at as a big BBQ picnic. Birria is a traditional dish made of sheep or goat that is generally prepared for weddings. There are not really any taboo foods in the Mexican culture, but many of the Mexican foods that we know of in the United States are Americanized versions of some traditional food. Many of the traditional spices used to season their foods have a dual purpose in medicinal healing; usually taking the form of some type of tea depending on what is ailing the person at the time. There is a tea to help cure whatever you may have ranging from an upset stomach to a hangover. There are no particular customs when it comes to how you eat your food in her culture, some foods are meant to be eaten with your hands, some are not, this is even the case with more formal feast such as weddings or Christmas.

Music and dancing are also a main part of her culture. Anyone is allowed to dance, there are no restrictions on who, where when or how to dance. You can dance with a friend, a family member, a loved one, alone or even in a group of people. It is not unusual for girls or women to dance with other girls or women, but the men and boys generally do not dance with other men or boys, unless they are very young children. There are certain dances that have more of a religious meaning to them and are exhibited more during the religious holidays and festivals. Other festivals you will see more of the traditional Mexican folk dancing. Each of the Mexican states has some form of their own dance that they do using their own style of music. The most common traditional music is the Ranchera type music, which usually involves trumpets, accordions, guitars and maracas. In the summertime I can hear this style of music blaring from the park down the road from my house, prior to living to where I do now I never really had much knowledge of this type of music. The costumes used in the traditional Mexican dances are very colorful and bright. Some of ladies dresses have full long skirts with many layers of ruffles and fabric so they can twist and twirl during the dances with exaggeration and flair. After talking to Martha about the dances I looked some up on the internet to see the performances and they really are breathtaking to me. The costumes are beautiful, the movements are strong, yet graceful and the music is very lively and upbeat. Children are taught religious and traditional folk dancing at younger ages, but it is not until they become quite a bit older that they are taught about some of the more sensual Mexican dances. Salsa and Merengue dancing are both dances that are considered very sexual or sensual dances, the partners are very close to one another and they can get very physical with one another. For Martha and her siblings it was taboo to have a “friendly” relationship with a member of the opposite sex until they were much older, so having the children learn these more sensual dances would conflicting with other beliefs in the culture. When they are older they have more freedom to chose the types of dances they would like to learn and participate in.

Martha stated that when she moved to Utah she wanted to raise her children differently that most Mexican immigrant families tend to. When looking for a home she tried to find neighborhoods that were predominantly Caucasian rather than Hispanic so her children could be raised with a more American influence. She said she always wanted her children to be raised more American with a little Mexican influence than the other way around. People in Utah were more open to her family race wise that religion wise, many of the children in the neighborhood were not allowed to play with Martha’s children due to the difference in religion. This is one of the things about the whole Utah/Mormon culture that infuriates me, for a religion that teaches love and kindness the people can be the complete opposite. Martha’s experience with this situation is not the only time I have heard this happening to people. Moving to the United States has given Martha a sense of freedom that she never had in Mexico. As a woman she can be ambitious and speak her mind without fear of punishment or ridicule. Both Martha and her children have been provided many more opportunities to progress in life through education, business and finance. Today Martha and her husband own their own business, have a beautiful home with automobiles to drive and even luxury items like a boat and ATV’s. None of these things would have been possible for her and her family is she would have stayed in Mexico, her life would pretty much be the same as when she grew up. She told me how grateful that she is to be here in the United States, but she is also grateful for her Mexican heritage and she hopes that it will live on through her children and get passed down through the generations of her own family.