I KILLED THE CHRIST (Screenplay)
The excerpt of the script may be read for free below. The full script can be purchased for Kindle at amazon.com or as a hard copy directly from Gregory J. Lavelle by calling at (440) 724-4538 or emailing at . Royalties to produce the work are negotiable.
I Killed the Christ - The Last Testament, like The DaVinci Code, is a mystery about alternate theories of the story of the crucifixion of Christ. The story begins with the discovery of a manuscript entitled, I Killed the Christ, in a sealed amphora in a secret chamber under the floor of a home which was buried under a mudslide following the eruption of Mt. Vesuvius in 79 AD. Bernard Columbi, an American archeologist, must determine whether the manuscript is real or fake, while dodging the police and the Department of Antiquities which are intent upon suppressing the manuscript as a hoax. The manuscript was allegedly written by the Centurion in charge of the crucifixion who claims to have witnessed the actual resurrection of Christ. The tale, if true, would solve the question which has puzzled biblical scholars for centuries, why only one gospel reflects the story of the repentant thief, that gospel having been written by Luke the Evangelist who was not present at the crucifixion. The story, written in screenplay format of a little over one hundred pages, combines mystery, faith, fast action and humor as the story of the Centurion, Gaius Lucius, unfolds as read by Columbi. It is a must-read for Christians seeking to reconnect with their faith.
EXT. VARIOUS SCENES IN AND AROUND CLASSIC ROME ENDING WITH A SCENE OF A MARBLE STATUE OF A VIRILE YOUNG ROMAN WHICH BLENDS INTO A FAT UGLY WORKMAN WITH THE SAME POSE.
EXT. HILLSIDE OF MT. VESUVIUS – DAY
WORKMAN sits on the tracks of a bulldozer, drinking a bottle of wine and holding a twinkie. Standing near him is FOREMAN, looking over drawings. CHRIS FARRELL, a handsome looking American about five foot ten and about fifty years old, comes up to FOREMAN angrily.
FERRELL
What the hell is he doing?
FOREMAN
(flip, with a heavy Italian accent) Taking a break. By union rules, men are entitled to a break.
FERRELL
(sarcastic) From dawn to midnight?
FOREMAN
(deadpan) Of course not. They don’t start until nine and they go home at three thirty.
FERRELL
I’m three months and two hundred thousand dollars behind on getting this hotel built.
FOREMAN shrugs and FERRELL throws up his hand and stalks off.
FOREMAN
(in Italian, subtitles) Break’s over.
WORKER shoves the entire twinkie into his mouth and gives a chin flip to FOREMAN who glares and walks away.
FOREMAN
(in Italian, subtitles under his breath) Lazy slob.
WORKER
(in Italian, subtitles under his breath) Fascist bastard
VARIOUS SCENES OF WORKER WITH THE BULLDOZER CUTTING INTO THE HILLSIDE ALTERNATING WITH SCENES OF WORKER TAKING NUMEROUS BREAKS, OGLING WOMEN, AND DRINKING WHILE FERRELL GOES BALLISTIC.
FERRELL STALKS UP TO THE FOREMAN POINTING TO THE WORKER WHO IS TAKING YET ANOTHER BREAK.
FERRELL
(angry, sarcastic) Doesn’t he understand the value of work?
FOREMAN
(flip) Of course he does. That’s why he wants to make sure it lasts as long as possible.
FERRELL rolls his eyes and walks away. FOREMAN motions to worker to start working. WORKER starts up the bulldozer and starts to level the area.
CLOSE UP of blade of bulldozer catching the edge of a large buried building stone, pulling it out of the ground and turning it over.
FOREMAN runs to the front of the bulldozer and motions for the bulldozer to stop.
FERRELL runs up.
FERRELL
(screaming, sarcastic) Another break? Somebody declare a new holiday?
FOREMAN
It is a big break for you. We seem to have found an archeological site.
FERRELL
A what?
FOREMAN
An archeological site. See that large square-looking rock. That is building stone. There was a house here.
FERRELL
How is that a break for me?
FOREMAN
You may become famous. The site, if important may become named for you.
FERRELL
(sarcastic) Great. Wonderful. Can we get on with the work now?
FOREMAN
No, that is not possible. The Department of Antiquities must review the site before any additional excavation can be done. They will not allow you to touch even another grain of sand.
FERRELL
They can’t do that.
FOREMAN
Yes, they can. You agreed to it.
FERRELL
No, I didn’t.
FOREMAN
Yes, you did, it’s written into every permit application issued here.
FERRELL
I didn’t see anything like that.
FOREMAN
It’s on the back of the form ---- in small print --- in Italian.
FERRELL
The clerk told me not to worry about it. He said it was just “boilerplate”.
FOREMAN
(toying with Ferrell with a slight chuckle) Yes, I believe that would be the proper term.
FERRELL
(flustered, growling, pointing at the WORKMAN) Well, at least send that guy home and save me some money.
FOREMAN
(mock sympathy) Sorry, he’s worked more than half the day. He will have to be paid for the whole day.
FERRELL
(shock/outrage) Half the day!!! He didn’t “work” fifteen minutes –
FOREMAN
Close enough.
FERRELL glares.
FOREMAN
I believe you Americans have an expression, “Close enough for hand grenades?”
FERRELL glares.
FOREMAN
Maybe I do not quite have that expression quite right?
FERRELL
(through gritted teeth, rolling his eyes, sarcastic, angry) Oh, you got it right. More right than you can possibly imagine.
CUT to WORKMAN, with a mouth overstuffed with food who gives a happy wave of his wine bottle.
CUT TO FERRELL on his cell phone.
FERRELL
Look, I got a problem. The bulldozer ran into a great big rock and the foreman tells me it’s a building stone – that we’ve got some kind of archeological site and that we can’t do anything else until the Department of Antiquities reviews it. ---- I have no idea how long that’ll take. I can’t afford any more delays. What am I supposed to do? --- Bribe somebody!!!? Yeah, right. Are you kidding me? --- Great. Fine.
FOREMAN comes over to FERRELL
FOREMAN
I called the Department of Antiquities. They said they would send somebody over on Monday.
INT LAB - UNIVERSITA DI SIENA - DAY
Professor CAPRINI answers the telephone.
CAPRINI
(in Italian, subtitles) Caprini. Hello, Marcello. ----- What do you need? ----- Do we have someone available? Perhaps. What kind of project? Standard boring stuff, huh? Probably somebody’s forgotten septic tank? We might have somebody. (calls to someone offscreen) (In English) Bernard, you wanted to go on a dig, right?
COLUMBI (OFFSCREEN)
Yes. Where?
CAPRINI
By Mt. Vesuvius. Let me get the information. (into phone in Italian with subtitles) Yes, we have someone available. I can have him there by one on Monday. Now, what are the details?
EXT. EXT. HILLSIDE AT THE BASE OF MT. VESUVIUS – DAY
FERRELL is pacing, angry, talking on his cell phone.
FERRELL
You told me he would be here by one. It’s almost three. --- Oh, wait. This might be him.
A small car pulls in and stops. The driver, BERNARD COLUMBI, about twenty-eight years old, rolls down the window. FERRELL runs up to the car.
FERRELL
Department of Antiquities? No excavo, uh, excavado, no dig. Bribo? Mucho Euros? Uh, capish?
COLUMBI
(with a laugh and a stereotypical fake Italian accent) Being froma Chicago, my Italian, she’s a notta so good.
FERRELL
(surprised) You’re an American.
COLUMBI
Exactamente.
FERRELL
(puzzled) Are you with the Department of Antiquities?
COLUMBI
I’m not “with” them, per se. The university sent me to do a quick review for them. I’m working on my PhD in Archeology at the University of Siena. They have a partnership/exchange with the University of Chicago. I’m Bernard Columbi.
FERRELL
Chris Ferrell. You speak Italian?
COLUMBI
Yeah. My grandpa was born in Rome. I had picked up a lot of words listening to him as a kid and decided to take it in college since I already had a head start. Of course, a lot of the words I picked up as a kid, (chuckles) I couldn’t use in class. --- Where’s our artifact?
FERRELL
Our what?
COLUMBI
The supposed “building stone”.
FERRELL
(points) Over there. I’ll show you. How long is your review going to take?
COLUMBI
(chuckles) It’ll probably be over in about five seconds. You see, most people have no idea what they’re looking at, so everybody digging is told, “If you dig something up in certain areas, call the Department of Antiquities.” Most of the time, what we end up looking at is the wall of an old cistern or some part of a World War II bunker. There’s a 99% chance its nothing. As far as anyone knows, there was never anything this high on the mountain before the 79AD eruption.
FERRELL
Really? So, all I have to worry about is that other one percent?
COLUMBI
(chuckles) Trust me, if the Department of Antiquities thought that it was anything at all, they’d have sent somebody other than me.
COLUMBI stops walking and points ahead.
COLUMBI
Is that it, sticking out of the ground?
FERRELL
Yep, that’s it.
COLUMBI walks over to the stone and kneels down and runs his hand over the stone.
COLUMBI
Interesting. It has graffiti on it.
FERRELL
(hopeful) So, its new stuff.
COLUMBI
No, I’m afraid not, Mr. Ferrell. “Graffiti” has been around for thousands of years. I don’t know what it says. Somebody else will have to translate it.
COLUMBI steps back and takes a picture of the graffiti with his cell phone.
COLUMBI
I think we have here part of that one percent you had to worry about. See this side of the stone. See how dark it is. Carbon. From cooking or lanterns. This is the inside of a wall. Can you help me turn this over?
FERRELL
Sure.
COLUMBI and FERRELL struggle and turn the stone over. COLUMBI brushes the dirt off the stone to reveal Stars of David and a cross.
COLUMBI
Wow. These are Signs of Solomon, symbols written by Jews designed to ward off evil. Like the lambs blood over a doorway. And this is a Christian cross.
COLUMBI steps back and takes a picture with his cell phone.
FERRELL
Both Jew and Christian?
COLUMBI
You forget, the early Christians were Jews. They split off when some didn’t want to buy the second set of books. (with a fake Yiddish accent) Why but a New Testament when the old one it still good?
FERRELL
What does this mean?
COLUMBI
It probably means that this was an early Christian household, buried under –
FERRELL
No, what does it mean for me? --- In terms of getting back to construction.
COLUMBI
(a nervous laugh) I don’t think you are going to have to worry about that.
COLUMBI steps back and takes a picture with his cell phone and FERRELL sighs with relief until COLUMBI continues.
COLUMBI
Archeological sites belong to the government. (a bit facetious) They’ll give you a fair price for it, maybe as much as forty percent of what you paid for it.
FERRELL grabs his head and starts walking in circles.
FERRELL
All because of that stupid rock!!!
COLUMBI
It’s a major find, Mr. Ferrell, likely a capstone over the entrance of a Christian home just before the eruption of Mt. Vesuvius.
FERRELL
(angry, challenging) If that’s the capstone to a house, where’s the rest of the house?
COLUMBI points up the mountain.
COLUMBI
Probably somewhere up there. This appears to have been brought down by a mudslide. After lava flows there are often mudslides because there is no vegetation to hold the earth together and stop the rainwater.
FERRELL points up the mountain.
FERRELL
How far “up there”?
COLUMBI
There’s really no way of telling. A few hundred yards? A mile?
FERRELL points to stakes about fifty yards away.
FERRELL
Certainly beyond the property line?
COLUMBI
I would think that’s probably true.
FERRELL
And the only thing that makes this an archeological site is that rock, right?
COLUMBI nods and gives a wan smile, knowing where FERRELL is headed. FERRELL walks about fifty feet past the stakes.
FERRELL
(slyly) So, if we “said” we found it over here?
COLUMBI
(joking) “Bribo?” No, Mr. Ferrell, we can’t do that. Chances are that there are no other artifacts on the property, but, we’d still have to “sound” it.
FERRELL
“Sound” it?
COLUMBI
We use a type of sonar that would give us some clues as to what might lie underneath the ground; very dense things, like marble and stone or hollow spaces which might indicate a buried room. If we find nothing else, then the property would probably be released for your project.
FERRELL
How long would the “sounding” take?
COLUMBI
A couple of days.
FERRELL
That’s not too bad.
COLUMBI
The “sounding” would take two days, Mr. Ferrell, but, a lot has to happen before the sounding. The site has to be certified as a “Site of Interest”. A plan has to be developed, a budget established, a team assembled ---. If expedited, many a year or so.