Notes from “Creating an Above-the-Line Classroom”

Presentations by Corwin Kronenberg 8/2007

Brain Research: From infancy, we are hard-wired . . .

  1. To seek out social connections with others.
  2. To seek approval and avoid disapproval (we don’t want to disappoint).
  3. To seek pleasure and avoid pain (This is important because every choice you offer children has to have something to gain or lose, “so you have something you can use.”)
  4. For flight or fight responses under stress. The only way to avoid this is to keep children in their “thinking” brain instead of their emotional-response areas. You do this by
  5. Asking Questions—at least 50% of your dialogue with a child (when disciplining) should involve asking questions.
  6. Keeping Calm—be calm, kind, caring, and gentle while disciplining. Be aware of your body language; the “mirror neurons” in our brains cause us to unconsciously mimic levels of voice, anxiety, etc. of people with whom we are dealing. Kids will test you—that is a fact. The only thing you can control is how you respond to that testing. “Their job is to challenge us. Our job is to teach responsibility” –Kronenberg.

From William Glasser’s Choice Theory:

Main idea: The only person you can control is you, but you can manage and teach others. In order to do so effectively, you need to understand all human beings’ 4 basic needs:

  1. Belonging: Fitting in with a group, feeling welcome, sensing membership. How do we bond with kids?
  2. Eye contact
  3. Smiling (“Give ‘em teeth!”)
  4. Physical Contact (Handshakes and other appropriate contact—not high-fives)
  5. Time(Time spent with a child increases the bond)
  6. Listening
  7. Power:
  8. Give them power over their behavior with responsibility
  9. Instead of “You will have to . . .” describe yourself—it’s best if you can do it in a question. “What do you think I’ll have to do about those missing assignments?”
  10. Set Limits (See Lessons to Start the Year With—create a mission, link rules to the mission)
  11. Freedom:
  12. Give freedom over choice for fixing a problem / mistake
  13. Non-choice scenarios:
  14. Safety concerns
  15. Law-breaking (including classroom rules and above-the-line beliefs)
  16. Immoral acts
  17. Fun

Stephen Covey: Relationships are Like Bank Accounts

  • You can make deposits or withdrawals, but you cannot overdraw your account.
  • Make pre-emptive deposits, because you’ll use a withdrawal each time you discipline. See above (Glasser’s 4 Human Needs) for ways to make deposits.

Consequences

  • They must be Related, Reasonable, and Respectful.
  • Are adult-driven (usually), compared to student-driven Fix-Its.
  • Once a student chooses a consequence, they keep it. They cannot then choose to have a fix-it plan, or they will try to play the system.

If a student asks, “What’s the consequence?”, try one of these . . .

--“It’s a good one. If I share it, you have to keep it.”

--“I don’t know. What do you think it should be?”

--“I’ll get back to you later—try not to worry about it.”

--“I don’t know. I thought I’d call your mom or dad and see if they have any good ideas.”

--“I don’t know. Maybe I’ll ask the principal. She always has good ideas. She thinks really big.”

Brain / Heart / Gut Discipiners

Brain: empower students; teach responsibility; engage “thinking” brain by using questions; they think before they act or talk; they discipline and NEVER punish

Heart: enable students; give in to behaviors; are driven by sympathy; they remind, warn, warn again, give second chances. Under stress, they rant, rave, and rescue (or ball out and bail out).

Gut: punish students; fight for power (get in “peeing contests”); are driven by anger; they command, demand, order, threaten, shame, blame, and punish.

Discipline vs. Punishment

Discipline is done out of love, FOR the kid. The kid learns respect and responsibility.

Punishment is done out of anger, TO the kid. The inevitable results are resentment, revenge, rebellion, retreat

  • Like a rock in water, punishments send ripples through a community—you run the risk of damaging a relationship with other students (even those you are not punishing) when you punish one.

Fix-Its

  • Kids need to own behavior before they can fix it.
  • Imagine the girl who was caught cheating on a test, but denies it; “I didn’t do it.”
  • A quality response: “The way you see it, that’s probably true. But what are we going to do about this cheating; do you want to fix it or do you want a consequence?”
  • If they are guilty beyond a reasonable doubt, and you have given them ample opportunity to own it, give them the consequence (“You’ve shown me that you aren’t ready to accept responsibility for this yet, so I’ll have to give you the consequence.”)
  • If there is reasonable doubt at all—let it go! Chances are, they’ll do it again and you’ll catch them!
  • “Sorry” DOESN’T FIX IT! You are simply admitting that you made a mistake!
  • Imagine ordering a Big Mac, fries, and a coke. When the order comes up, there are no fries. You complain and the cashier says, “Sorry!” Does that fix it? No!
  • Having students practice the appropriate behavior is a good way to learn responsibility;
  • “Pretend I’m Julia—how are you going to apologize to me?”
  • “That didn’t sound very convincing—try to look me in the eyes and stop fidgeting.”
  • “Maybe you could practice being nice to Precious first, then try it with Julia.”
  • Imagine a boy who held the bathroom door closed; he has decided to hold the door open for others as they enter the lunch room. That’s related, reasonable, and respectful—but, if needed, he could “practice” holding the door for people as they go to recess.
  • Fix-Its are fundamentally driven by students. As such, you (as an adult) do not know where the process will end up. Release that power to the kids as long as it meets the standard of related, reasonable, and respectful.
  • During Fix-It conversations . . .
  • “So what will I see or hear as you’re . . . . (being “nice” to Johnny)?”

Bottom-Line Behaviors

  • “If you’re bottom line, you’re not mine”
  • Behaviors (usually dictated by board policy) which are serious / dangerous—fighting, drugs / alcohol, sexual assault, etc.
  • They go to the principal and should be agreed upon in advance of the year with the principal

Skunk Skinning Rules

  1. Never skin a skunk when the skunk is upset *
  2. Never skin a skunk when you are upset *
  3. * These are important—call the discipline referral team to cover your class so you can preemptively address a growing behavior concern. If the behavior has already reached a certain level of seriousness, the student will need time to cool down before dealing with the problem.
  4. Never get into a peeing contest with a skunk
  5. Many students want to engage you in power struggles. Don’t let it happen. Remember, you cannot control another person’s behavior.
  6. Use “I will . . .” statements. For example, a student refuses to re-locate in the classroom saying, “You can’t make me!” “You’re right. You’re right. I will call for help.”
  7. Kicking things over on the way is OK. (Yikes!) You are getting compliance with defiance. You have controlled their actions, but they are having the ‘last word.’ That’s OK—remember, she needs to belong—and that includes belonging to the peer group. Get the key behavior first, the rest will come.

Great questions to prompt thinking / teach responsibility / offer choices . . .

  1. What do we believe here at Thoreau about . . . (a behavior related to the mission of Learn, Make Friends, Have Fun)? Everything you do has to fit with what we believe. If it doesn’t, you can’t do it.
  2. Is that going to help you learn?
  3. Will budging in line help you make friends?
  4. Do you want to fix it or a consequence?
  5. We’ve got a mess to clean up—would you like to help me now or during the break?
  6. Wow, you have 5 missing assignments. What do you think I’ll have to / should do about that?
  7. What do you want to have happen here? What choice could you make that has the greatest chance of working out well for you?

Think of kids as a piece of paper—what kind of mark are you going to leave on them?

Lessons to Start the Year With:

Key idea: Engage kids in establishing rules (sharing power)

  1. Create a MISSION / Purpose / Set of Beliefs for classroom
  2. What is the purpose of school?
  3. Answers generally fit this mission: Learn, Make Friends, Have Fun
  4. “Everything you (as a student) do has to help us Learn, Make Friends, or Have Fun—if it doesn’t, you can’t do it.”
  5. Make RULES linked to the Mission
  6. Draw a line on the board (title “Behaviors”)—“If I was going to divide student behavior into two groups, what would they be?”
  7. Likely responses include good/bad, acceptable/unacceptable, etc.
  8. Brainstorm a list of “good” behaviors
  9. As behaviors are listed, write Respectful, Responsible, Safe
  10. All good behaviors should fit into one or more of these categories—process that with students as they brainstorm behaviors
  11. Eventually, behaviors can be described as Above or Below the line.
  12. The rules for the class then become, Be Respectful, Responsible, and Safe
  13. It’s important to keep rules positive because kids picture nouns and verbs. If you say, “Don’t run,” they picture someone running. Try, “Walk” or “Stop.”

* You’ll need to teach many of the behaviors—especially to younger students. See the Kronenberg resources (in the teachers’ resource room) for ideas.

  1. We all need to WORK to make it happen
  2. What does work look like / sound like?
  3. If the mission is to learn, make friends, and have fun—what would the work be?
  4. My Job Is / Your Job Is: List what the students’ / teachers’ jobs are
  5. Work is doing what you’re supposed to be doing and bringing the materials needed to do it.
  6. Maybe add a dialogue about what a parent’s job is . . .

Early Interventions;

  • Call discipline referral team proactively to cover class in order to privately address growing behavior issue
  • Send a student with a delivery: “Ms. Windels wanted to borrow this book. Could you please take it to her?”
  • You could move their things (if needed) when they’re gone, and explain; “Oh, I moved your things over here because I might have another mission for you soon.”
  • Change location and you change behavior (most of the time)
  • “Wow, it’s hot in here. I’m thirsty, but I can’t leave . . . Why don’t you go get a drink for me?”
  • Get used to pulling kids aside and having conversations—make them light. “Hear any owls last night?” “It’s been raining a lot, huh?” That helps reduce the stress of the disciplinary private conversations.

As a Staff:

  • Are most kid behaviors acceptable or unacceptable?
  • What happens if one person thinks a behavior is acceptable and another does not? (Wearing hats?)
  • “The faculty is only as strong as its weakest link” –Kronenberg
  • What happens when there is a “gray area?” (Kronenberg’s bedtime story)