TOSSUPS – BLIND ROUND ACF DETOX 2005 – UT-CHATTANOOGA

Questions by Matt Bruce

1. Miss Weber, your third grade teacher. Gene Hackman--that guy is everywhere. Your friend's dad who says, "Let me tell ya how we did things back in Philly." Your neighbor who claims he's a "poet like Brautigan." Your co-worker who dates an alcoholic bartender and insists, "He's too smart for his own good." FTP, name this diabolical quintet presented by the McSweeneys humor web site to spoof the premise of a certain Mitch Albom work.

Answer: The Five People You Meet In Hell

2. Nancy Sinatra went outdoors to cover this song for a televised performance. Like "MacArthur Park" it was written by Jimmy Webb, who wanted it to be part of a documentary about a radio station promotional device. It won four Grammy Awards and peaked at #7 in 1967 for a group whose other hits include "One Less Bell to Answer" and "Age of Aquarius." FTP, name this Fifth Dimension song about your desire to fly in a beautiful (a beautiful) balloon.

Answer: Up, Up and Away

3. He got to interview Bill Gates while hosting Microsoft's demo at the 2005 International Consumer Electronics Show, where he quipped that "I saw more women at Elton John's bachelor party." Born and raised in Brookline, he graduated from Harvard in 1985 after becoming only the second person ever to serve two years as president of the Lampoon. FTP, name this writer and talk show host, who in 2009 will succeed Jay Leno on "The Tonight Show."

Answer: Conan (Christopher) O'Brien

4. Primary sources that describe this realm include the messages of the Lost Battalion and teachings of Eight-and-a-Half Tails. Foxes, rats, snakes, goblins, and moonfolk are known as Kitsune, Nezumi, Orochibito, Akki, and Soratami. Instead of conflict along color lines, it features a struggle between the spiritual and material worlds. Loosely based on 16th century Japan, this is, FTP, what setting of new Magic the Gathering releases that feature Champions and Betrayal?

Answer: Kamigawa

5. Settings include a Hong Kong factory, where the title character sees such awful conditions that he gains new respect for how his dad ran businesses. Candice Bergen stars as Marcy Bonwit Nash, a recently divorced professional who meets the protagonist while jogging. Budding romance helps the title character get over losing Jenny, whose funeral opens this 1978 sequel. Ryan O'Neal plays a widower in, FTP, what dismal follow-up to Love Story?

Answer: Oliver's Story

6. After two years at Pitt, he was taken in the second round of the 1997 draft by Seattle, only to be waived before playing a game. After three years in the USBL, he resurfaced in Boston, leading the 2001 Celtics with 76 blocks. Despite his position, in a 2005 game he managed to play 22 minutes with no points, rebounds, or blocks. FTP, name the player who Bill Simmons claims will do at least three horrible things within 90 minutes of your turning on a Celtics game.

Answer: Mark Blount

7. In 1987 Dennis Conner, Magic Johnson, Frank Viola, and Phil Simms all claimed it as their upcoming destination. Doug Williams, Joe Montana twice, Ottis Anderson, Mark Rypien, Troy Aikman, and Emmitt Smith all appeared in subsequent Super Bowl themed ads. Tom Brady and various Boston Red Sox were the last people to utter a certain catchphrase in post-championship commercials touting, FTP, what Orlando theme park?

Answer: Disney World (accept "I'm going to Disney World!")

[Disney did not continue the ad campaign for the 2005 Super Bowl but might bring it back later.]

8. Producer Jon Brion compared her songwriting method to a college student cramming for a term paper, and Sony saw no viable singles on her third album, completed in May 2003 but still unreleased nearly two years later. "A Better Version of Me" is a track on Extraordinary Machine, her last album since a sophomore effort with a 90-word title. FTP, name the singer whose debut album, Tidal, featured "Shadowboxer" and "Criminal."

Answer: Fiona Apple (Maggart)


9. One of the title characters almost dates a woman played by Liz Taylor and does speak the line, "Girls are tough; that's why I never had a daughter." Another title character has his premises reorganized by Martha Stewart for his birthday. The final title character is a self-centered Detroit assembly line worker, the subject of a wager between two immortals. FTP, name this short-lived animated series featuring James Garner, Alan Cumming, and French Stewart.

Answer: God, The Devil, and Bob

10. Players included quarterback Steve [not Sean] Salisbury, running back Arnie Asada, and wide receivers Bo Vine and Willie Maykette. With time running out in the opening game, the Cincinnati Ricecakes completed a Hail Mary pass but the cheerleaders distracted the referee as time ran out. The Dallas Corndogs and L.A. Vegans are other rivals of, FTP, what fictional football team seen years ago in ads for Jack in the Box and named after consumers of meat?

Answer: Carnivores (prompt on "Jack in the Box")

11. After 11 years away from the silver screen she made a comeback in 1953, appearing in Treasure of the Golden Condor and Small Town Girl. After starring opposite Erich von Stroheim in The Wedding March, she landed lead roles in Thunderbolt and Master of Men. Horror movies like Doctor X and The Vampire Bat showcased her piercing scream. FTP, name this blonde seductress known for her work with a certain tall, dark leading man, namely King Kong.

Answer: (Vina) Fay Wray

12. He was born in Rostock but studied in Berlin; after the Wall fell he moved to Hamburg with his trainer. After a second-place finish in 1996, he won the yellow jersey as a 23-year-old, but came in second to Marco Pantani in the scandal-ridden 1998 Tour de France. After a knee injury kept him out of the 1999 Tour, he finished second three more times. FTP, name this German biker and archrival of Lance Armstrong.

Answer: Jan Ullrich

13. The second story is about a sports agent and his old flame. The third takes place at a private vacation club called intimacies. The first involves a visit to a newly-opened porn shop, and subsequent bondage between a shy girl and her boss. "Indulge Me," "Naughty by Night," and "And When They Were Bad" are the three novellas contained in, FTP, what best-selling trashy romance anthology whose title describes a first-person affinity for misbehaving men?

Answer: I Love Bad Boys

14. "Well, now. We call this the act of mating. But, there are several other very important differences between human beings and animals that you should know about." After the drums kick in, the lead singer's first words are "I appreciate your input." The first verse begins "Sweat, baby, sweat, baby, love is a Texas drought." FTP, name the Bloodhound Gang song whose chorus suggests that you "Do it like they do on the Discovery Channel."

Answer: The Bad Touch (prompt on "Bloodhound Gang")

15. She's legal as of August 2, 2010. Her last big screen part was in 2003's Jesus, Mary, and Joey, though her TV movie credits include Helen Keller in "The Miracle Worker" and Lucy McFadden in TNT's remake of "The Goodbye Girl." You may know her best from such ad campaigns as "A Little Twist on a Great Thing," where she appears with Barry Bostwick and Halle Berry. FTP, name this Pepsi girl.

Answer: Hallie (Kate) Eisenberg

16. Evidence that they exist was supposedly found by French explorer Henri Baq in the cellars of an Assassin castle. In 1213 a Toranian prince put archers on them. The Queen of Sheba sent a green one to King Solomon, embroidered with gold and silver, so long and wide that the entire king's host could stand on it. Azhar Abidi wrote the literary hoax providing those apocryphal details of, FTP, what mythical Arabic mode of transportation?

Answer: flying carpets (prompt on "carpets")

17. Twin siblings both have repressed memories. The sister shares a house with a gay man played by George Carlin, but attempts suicide and ends up in the care of Dr. Susan Lowenstein. The brother falls in love with Dr. Lowenstein and tries to help her son become a better football player. Blythe Danner, Nick Nolte, and Barbra Streisand star in, FTP, what Streisand-directed movie based on a Pat Conroy novel?

Answer: The Prince of Tides


18. WARNING: TEAM AND POSITION REQUIRED. Gary Scott for parts of 1991 and 1992. Steve Buechele [boo-SHELL] from 1992 to 1995. Vance Law and Luis Salazar in 1989, and Ron Cey [SAY] from 1983 to 1986. Gary Gaetti [guy-ETT-ee] for the 1998 wild card and Aramis Ramirez as a mid-season pickup en route to winning the 2003 NL Central. FTP, name this revolving-door corner infield position of a team from the Friendly Confines.

Answer: third baseman of the Chicago Cubs (prompt on "Chicago")

19. In the first post on his new weblog, he accused the New York Consumer Protection Board of using his name to get cheap publicity for a press release and noted that he'd done nothing wrong. The information he sells is available elsewhere for free but, as he points out, if the government publicized it better then his services wouldn't be necessary. FTP, name this pitchman with question marks on his suits who wants you to get free money from the government.

Answer: Matthew Lesko

20. The protagonist wants to give his girlfriend flowers and other presents including a wedding ring. Tommy sees a sign offering a thousand dollar prize for a stock car race and enters the race, only to have his car overturn in flames. As Tommy's pulled from the twisted wreck, Tommy's final words are a romantic message to his sweetheart. FTP, name this 1960 hit by the recently deceased Ray Peterson, whose title could be the hypothetical last words of our 43rd president.

Answer: Tell Laura I Love Her

21. On top: The Goofball, Princess Kashmir, and Barry White. In the middle: Rainier Wolfcastle, Lurleen Lumpkin, and Troy McClure. We don't see clearly who's on the bottom row but a 50-foot tidal wave destroys the set just before the broadcast shows cryptic ads promoting Gabbo. FTP, name this fictional game show seen at the start of "Krusty Gets Kancelled," a spoof of the real show hosted by Peter Marshall, John Davidson, and Whoopi Goldberg.

Answer: Springfield Squares

22. The archives of this country's National Remembrance Institute supposedly hold a list of over 200,000 names that were secretly copied by journalist Bronislaw Wildstein and posted to the Internet. Prime Minister Marek Belka told intelligence services to do what they could to prevent danger to any active agents on that list of alleged spies. FTP, name this formerly Communist nation in Eastern Europe that George W. Bush once accused John Kerry of forgetting.

Answer: Republic of Poland

BONI – BLIND ROUND ACF DETOX 2005 – UT-CHATTANOOGA

Questions by Matt Bruce

1. For 10 points each, name these supposedly unrelated movies:

A. Michelle Rodriguez plays Diana, a young woman who finds an outlet in the world of boxing.

Answer: Girlfight

B. Sonja Bennett plays Ariel, a young woman who finds an outlet in the world of boxing.

Answer: Punch

C. Hilary Swank plays Maggie, a young woman who finds an outlet in the world of boxing.

Answer: Million Dollar Baby

2. For 10 points each, name these Philadelphia Eagle wide receivers who aren't Terrell Owens or Freddie Mitchell:

A. "Lack of focus" was his excuse for playing poorly in the January 2004 NFC championship game. Later in 2004, he claimed to have lost a ball in the lights when he blatantly pulled up on a deep ball in a Sunday night game.

Answer: Todd Pinkston

B. Now a Redskin, he set career highs with 833 yards and eight touchdowns in 2001, the first of his three years in Philly.

Answer: James Thrash

C. As Ron Jaworski's go-to guy, he had 1,409 receiving yards and 13 touchdowns in 1983, his first full season.

Answer: Mike Quick

3. Harry Potter's had to do some odd things for detention. For 5 points each per answer, given a task, name both the Hogwarts teacher who sentences Potter to detention and the person who supervises Potter during the detention.

A. Repeatedly writing that he will not spread lies--with a pen that uses his own blood as ink.

Answer: Dolores Umbridge, Dolores Umbridge

B. Addressing envelopes for responses to fan mail.

Answer: Minerva McGonagall, Gilderoy Lockhart

C. Finding a wounded unicorn in the forbidden forest.

Answer: Minerva McGonagall, Rubeus Hagrid

[Filch catches Potter in the tower but the detention order comes from McGonagall]

4. For 5 points per answer, given lyrics name both the song and the singer or band who originally recorded it.

A. "Every now and then I know there's no one in the universe as magical and wonderous as you."

Answer: Total Eclipse of the Heart by Bonnie Tyler (accept Gaynor Hopkins)

B. "I'm taken with the notion to love you with the sweetest of devotion."

Answer: Baby Baby by Amy (Lee) Grant

C. "You could sustain, or are you comfortable with the pain?"

Answer: Hold On by Wilson Phillips

[These are all "Cole's Extreme Mix," the mix tape found in the skate punks' truck in Harold and Kumar]

5. For 10 points each, name these fake products featured on season one of "Chappelle's Show":

A. With this service, you'll always be able to catch your spouse or babysitter telling a lie.

Answer: The Home Stenographer

B. Just like the Academy Awards! This button will cut short boring stories, bad sex, even a judge's lecture.