When the teacher says “Good Morning”, stand up and say, “My name is Alvin”.
When someone stands up and says “My name is Alvin”, stand up and say, “No, it’s not.”
When someone stands up and says, “No it’s not”, cough 3 times.
When someone coughs 3 times, go to the board and write the word SWAYS on the board.
When someone writes the word SWAYS on the board, get up and walk around your desk 3 times.
When someone gets up and walks around their desk 3 times, say “Please sit down”.
When someone says “Please sit down”, get up and turn off the lights.
When someone turns off the lights, go to the board and write the word STOP under the word SWAY.
When someone writes the word STOP on the board, turn the lights on.
When someone turns the lights on, clap your hands twice.
When someone claps their hands twice, say, “We need to open a window in here.”
When someone says “We need to open a window in here”, go open a window.
When someone shuts the window, go to the board and write the word GONE under the word STOP.
When someone writes the word GONE on the board, say “It’s awfully cold in here.”
When someone says “It’s awfully cold in here”, go shut the window.
When someone shuts the window, go to the board, and erase all of the S’s from all of the words on the board.
When someone erases all of the S’s on the board, stand up and say, “We forgot to pledge the Flag!”
When someone stands and says, “We forgot to pledge the flag”, go to the phone, pick it up, look at the class, and say “I’m sorry, there’s no one here.”
When someone says, “I’m sorry, there’s no one here”, go to the board and erase the E from the word GONE.
When someone erases the E from the word GONE on the board, stand up and snap your fingers 3 times.
When someone stands and snaps their fingers 3 times, go to the window blinds and raise one, then lower it again.
When someone raises and lowers the blind, stand and say, “Will you please make up your mind?”
When someone says “Will you please make up your mind” say, “Okay, I’ll have a cheeseburger.”
When someone says, “Okay, I’ll have a cheeseburger”, say, “Would you like fries and a shake with that?”
When someone says, “Would you like fries and a shake with that?”, walk over to the teacher and skip around her twice.
When someone skips around the teacher twice, bark like a dog.
When someone barks like a dog, stand up and say, “I’m the King of the World!”
When someone stands and says, “I’m the King of the World!”, stand up and say, “Iceberg, dead ahead!”
When someone stands and says, “Iceberg, dead ahead!”, make a sound like a car horn honking.
When someone makes a sound like a car horn honking, stand up and stomp your feet.
When someone stands up and stomps their feet, go to the classroom library, pick a book from the shelf and begin to read silently.
When someone goes to the classroom library and begins to read a book, say, “You’re holding that book upside down.”
When someone says, “You’re holding that book upside down”, go back and lead the reader back to h is/her seat.
When someone leads a student back to their seat, stand up and say, “Aren’t we done yet?”
When someone says, “Aren’t we done yet?” go to the board and erase the P and the N, add an exclamation point after the last word, and bow to the class.