Our Agreement Schedule

We are the parents of:

______(child’s name) ______(date of birth)

We respect each other as parents and understand the equal significance we hold in our children’s lives.

We have drawn up this Agreement Schedule to support us during and after our separation/divorce in providing a loving, stable and nurturing environment for our children, consistent with their developmental needs and our social and financial circumstances.

We recognise our children’s right to:

•emotional and physical care and stability;

•feel loved by both of us and by other significant family members;

•develop independent and meaningful relationships with each of us;

•feel supported and protected by both of us as they develop their lives within and beyond their family.

As parents we accept responsibility for:

•our children’s physical and emotional well-being;

•meeting our children’s changing needs as they grow and mature;

•protecting our children from exposure to harmful parental conflict;

•cooperating with each other to make decisions in our children’s best interests.

Signed: ______(Parent) ______(Print name)

Signed: ______(Witness) ______(Print name)

Date: ______20 ______

A. QUALITY OF COMMUNICATION

These are the agreements we’ve reached over the following issues:

1. How we speak about each other to the children or when the children are within earshot:

2. Which methods or media we will use to keep in contact with each other about the children:

3. How we’ll encourage our children to feel relaxed about talking to each of us about their life in their other home:

4. How we’ll let our children know that we talk to each other about them:

5. How we’ll maintain contact with members of each other’s extended families:

6. How we’ll encourage our children to maintain contact with members of each of our sides of the family:

7. How we’ll schedule reviews of this Agreement Schedule and how we’ll negotiate and record changes we wish to make in it:

8. Who else apart from us will hold a copy of this Agreement Schedule:

B. SHARED CARE - THE PRACTICAL ARRANGEMENTS

These are the agreements we’ve reached over the following issues.

9. The nature and location of the two homes we are providing for our children:

10. The regular weekly/fortnightly/monthly schedule of shared care:

11. Variations in the shared care schedule during holidays:

12. Variations in the shared care schedule for special family/social/ceremonial occasions:

13. Variations in the shared care schedule for days during term-time when schools are closed:

14. Arrangements for how our children travel from one home to the other, including how any costs incurred by this will be met:

15. Measures we will take to protect our children from witnessing possible conflict between us at handover times:

16. Arrangements for when one of us is unavoidably prevented from taking over care at the appointed time:

17. Arrangements for how we communicate with each other if/when emergencies occur during our period of care:

18. Measures we will take to ensure our children are able to keep themselves confidently informed about shared care dates, changes to the schedule, forthcoming breaks or holidays etc:

19. Measures we will take to minimise stress for our children in moving between homes:

20. Measures we will take to ensure that we don’t intrude inappropriately on the other parent’s care time:

21. Arrangements for maintaining contact with the children when they are in the care of the other parent:

22. Measures we will take to ensure our children’s regular commitments - social, academic, sporting, Saturday jobs - can be successfully upheld and maintained while in both homes:

C. HOLIDAYS

These are the agreements we’ve reached over the following issues.

23. The number of weeks per year each of us will have in which to take the children away on holiday:

24. How we will schedule holiday time for ourselves as individuals without the children:

25. How we will negotiate between us when our holidays with and without the children will be:

26. How much notice we commit to providing each other if either of us wishes to change or renegotiate a holiday arrangement:

27. Our children being taken abroad on holiday by either of us:

28. Where our children’s passports will generally be kept:

D. HEALTH

These are the agreements we’ve reached over the following issues.

29. How our children’s routine health appointments are managed:

30. How we will arrange to keep each other informed about our children’s health matters:

31. Our arrangements for care of our children if one of us is ill and unable to maintain the shared care schedule:

E. EDUCATION

These are the agreements we’ve reached over the following issues.

32. Arrangements for communicating our changed family circumstances to our children’s schools:

33. Ongoing arrangements for how each of us maintains contact with the children’s schools and the schools maintain contact with each of us:

34. Our protocol for attendance at school functions:

35. Arrangements for how we will negotiate choices of schools for our children if the need arises:

36. How we will offer joint support to our children when they are needing advice and consultation over choices and options:

F. MONEY

These are the agreements we’ve reached over the following issues:

37. Our children’s pocket money:

38. How funds will be allocated to cover our children’s clothing, academic, sporting, artistic and recreational needs:

39. How funds will be allocated for the purchase of high-cost items for our children:

40. How our children’s driving lessons will be paid for:

41. How our children’s further/higher education or professional training fees will be funded:

42. Our arrangements for funding high-cost birthday or festive presents:

G. VALUES, BELIEFS AND BEHAVIOUR

These are the agreements we’ve reached over the following issues:

43. Particular house rules to be maintained in both homes:

44. Measures we will take to support each other in maintaining these:

45. Arrangements for maintaining/promoting our children’s faith and/or cultural tradition(s) in both homes:

46. Other significant people whose influence/support we wish to enlist in upholding our children’s faith and/or cultural tradition(s):

H. THE FUTURE: CHANGES TO THE FAMILY SHAPE

These are the agreements we’ve reached over the following issues.

47. How/when we will inform each other about significant new relationships in either of our lives:

48. How we will introduce our children to new partners and to new partners’ children:

THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO DIVORCED PARENTING - AGREEMENT SCHEDULE 1